MARCH UPDATE

POSTED ON Jun 3, 2021 10:36:48 GMT

[attr="class","beck"]"not to me, no."

how does one convince a person of something that goes against years of conditioning? he of all people should know, but he doesn't. his lips thin into a line, settling as he thinks.

he lands on a thought.

"do you love your parents, raziel?"

[attr="class","noodles"]Raziel Beckett

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POSTED ON Jun 3, 2021 15:17:13 GMT

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[attr="class","razzboxbl"]

The boy will tilt his head at that. If not at him then why have a problem? Though he find the question almost just a confusing [break][break]

”Of course I do,” there isn’t even the slightest bit of hesitation there despite things. His parents were just strict is all. ”But why ask that?

[break][break]

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[attr="class","pokeclass"]

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POSTED ON Jun 3, 2021 16:31:21 GMT

[attr="class","beck"]"why?"

he stabs a fork into what little remains of the french toast, cuts it little with a knife. he makes sure to slide it over syrup, coating it.

"do you love them just because you're supposed to?"

[attr="class","noodles"]Raziel Beckett

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POSTED ON Jun 3, 2021 17:31:02 GMT

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[attr="class","razzboxbl"]

That left like a loaded question. One he isn't entirely sure how to answer, "Umm no? Yes? I don't know?" he's still confused, "But they care too, dad does a lot for me from teaching me, and playing games, and he protects me. [break][break]

Why do that that if he didn't care?" he doesn't mention his mother, but that was more because most his time was with his father.

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POSTED ON Jun 4, 2021 15:25:50 GMT

[attr="class","beck"]"because it's his responsibility as a parent. nothing more."

anything he says to raziel, he says to pryde, that much he knows. but the words continue to slip out easy, unhindered, because what would pryde do? what could he do? nothing, if he values his life.

"they don't love you."

[attr="class","noodles"]Raziel Beckett

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POSTED ON Jun 4, 2021 18:27:33 GMT

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[attr="class","razzboxbl"]

He doesn’t know what to say to that, he doesn’t know what he can say to that. He really didn’t like this mission anymore. [break][break]

”You’re wrong,... they do.... dad does” its all he could really say as he clenches his fist on his knees visibly upset.

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POSTED ON Jun 4, 2021 18:35:09 GMT

[attr="class","beck"]"does he really?"

he speaks as casually as when they had first entered the building, voice still against the venom that poisons his words. he places the knife and fork down, then reaches for the napkin.

"you don't hurt the people you love, raziel. and he's hurt you before, hasn't he"

[attr="class","noodles"]Raziel Beckett

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POSTED ON Jun 4, 2021 18:52:33 GMT

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[attr="class","razzboxbl"]

”Of course he does, I.. he... you don’t know what you’re talking about,” he’s defensive, he wants to leave, but he’s been told he can’t leave until Theo said otherwise so he’s trapped. All he can do is look down to avoid the other. [break][break]

”Those were my fault, you do bad you get punished,” it was a fact of life that was deeply ingrained, ”Like when you took Merlino away, people thought him dead but you punished him, it’s no different,” not to him

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POSTED ON Jun 4, 2021 19:36:28 GMT

[attr="class","beck"]"but that's not love, raziel."

he tenses at the mention of merlino, involuntary, and he also finds his gaze retreating elsewhere. it settles on a table not too far away from them and its occupants.

"that's different. merlino isn't my son and i don't love him."

[attr="class","noodles"]Raziel Beckett

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POSTED ON Jun 4, 2021 19:56:21 GMT

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[attr="class","razzboxbl"]

”Just because my dad’s style is different to yours doesn’t mean he loves any less than you love your daughter,” is that going too far? He doesn’t know, all he knows is that he came here expecting a real mission, all to have Theo trying to break his reality. [break][break]

”Its not different, I do something bad I get corrected so no one else has to,” because he’s always been told that the rest of Rocket won’t be as forgiving as him.

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POSTED ON Jun 4, 2021 20:01:16 GMT

[attr="class","beck"]"it's different."

he says, convincing himself. he's long realized this conversation will likely lead nowhere. it's only out of pure stubbornness that he's yet to concede. but he does compromise a little, sighing as he continues.

"i have no use for you in the field. you're better off in the labs, where you'll be safe."

[attr="class","noodles"]Raziel Beckett

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POSTED ON Jun 4, 2021 20:15:17 GMT

][nospaces]

[attr="class","razzboxbl"]

Raziel continues to look down, not wanting the other to see as his eyes water, especially now that fear hits him. He tries not to show himself as being weak, but he knows in the end he is. Especially when he’s told he’s useless and he feels his stomach drop. ”No please,” he’s terrified, ”Please I’m not useless I’ve been working hard... I’m getting better... I’m not useless” [break][break]

Those who are useless in Rocket get tossed aside, become fodder. That’s what his parents always told him and now he’s terrified that this is what Theo wants him to become. It would be like an adult to tell him they care just to toss him aside minutes later. At least he knows his parents would never toss him aside. Not like this.[break][break]

”I’m not useless.”

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POSTED ON Jun 4, 2021 20:30:25 GMT

[attr="class","beck"]i'm not useless.

push.

"you aren't in the labs, no. but in the field?"

i'm not useless.

push, beckett.

"you pale in comparison to asriel."

[attr="class","noodles"]Raziel Beckett

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POSTED ON Jun 4, 2021 20:42:21 GMT

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[attr="class","razzboxbl"]

He is pale, he doesn’t understand. Wasn’t he the reason they were still alive? Didn’t he give him the Bulbasaur cause he thought him improving? He bites his lip looking down again. ”This is what I meant about what you say and what you do” [break][break]

”I’ll just stay in the labs then,” it what he tells him but he knows it won’t last, not if his parents had anything to say about it. Which they always did. ”Are we done?”[break][break]

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beck

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