”...What do you mean, ‘work’...?”[break][break]

He hadn’t intended to sound as confused as he did. To hear the response as given had only served to further raise questions within his mind. Furrowing his brows in thought, he eyed the ground beneath them while gathering his thoughts, eventually beginning once more with a short lived, ”That doesn’t—... If it was just that, then—...”[break][break]

His brows only furrowed more in further confusion before he looked back up.[break][break]

”...’Work,’ would at least make a farewell warranted, no?” he spoke on, slowly, in an attempt to limit himself and maintain a hold upon his thoughts, lest they tear the reins from his grasp. He tapped his fingers against his arm, quirking his lip. ”If that was all it was, then surely it’d be justified…”[break][break]

...Wouldn’t it?”

AYAME FUJIWARA

☉

of course he's curious. she only barely said anything when she left, and now she was barely telling him of sustenance. should she tell him? what she was up to? what blood she's spilled on her hands? would he love her any less? would he stop her from doing something that she would regret, stop her from leaving him again? the thought softens the smile to her lips, and in the reflection of her eyes, you can see the small shade of regret. [break][break]

now she's turning her gaze away, from him. she doesn't dare look him in the eye - not right now, at least. ".. i'm sorry for leaving without saying anything." her smile returns, but she can't look at him directly when she speaks "it was just.." there's a hitch in her breath, and the words clog up in her throat for a moment "- a dangerous job. and i didn't want you to be worried."

or to stop me, because he would have.

Asahiko Hakuryuu

☉

…Had she always been so hesitant to look at him?[break][break]

No. Within days long past, it would’ve been him that had been not quite hesitant to gaze upon her, but rather, begrudging; indignant towards even so much as the idea of doing so. It was a concept only fathomable within the days of their initial meeting, when he had been so revolted by her and her dishonesty to herself. A smile was a tool so easily used to masked what was beneath.[break][break]

It was a concept no truer than with her.[break]
It was a concept seen through from the beginning.[break][break]

Thus, the smile he saw then and there unnerved him, and the aversion of gaze only seemed to emphasize his discomfort. His brows remained furrowed in pensive confusion as he attempted to process the vast array of hypotheticals that could justify the vagueness he’d been offered.[break][break]

…And then she offered him a measly explanation.[break]
Vague. Still, still vague.[break][break]

”And so you thought leaving without so much as a word would’ve been any better?” he murmured, skeptical.

AYAME FUJIWARA

☉

does it ail you, ayame? [break][break]

to know that a man you so dearly loved (and still love), confront you about your departure? he doesn't know how she holds herself back - how she restrains herself - from springing to him, and hold him in her arms as she cries, saying how she's missed him, saying how much she loves him, saying what wrong she's done and how she regret leaving. but ayame's taught to be reserved, and now she's trying to apply that to him. [break][break]

she always was, to some degree. it's just that this time was a little harder to do. [break][break]

so she takes a step back, not knowing what to say, not knowing how to run away (she wants to, desperately, but she doesn't. it's a conflict in her mind). "i--" she starts to say, but the words are failing her. what does she say? [break][break]

she's become so good at lying, but she's never able to lie in front of him. [break]
not anymore. [break][break]

she's being vague because she knows she can't lie. so she keeps her gaze to the ground, and she hesitates again. her breath is shaky when she finally takes a step back to say "i joined rocket." she takes another step back, and she can't look him in the eye "so it.. was for the best."[break][break]

i can't drag you to hell with me.

Asahiko Hakuryuu

☉

That response only paved the way for more questions.[break][break]

Though he listened, and though the words met his ears, he simply found himself furrowing his brows in a further sense of processing and confusion. He watched as she stepped back, and back, and back— and it had only been after the second step that he’d caught what had been happening and opted to take a pace forward to follow her.[break][break]

”...For the best, how?” he started off, narrowing his eyes. ”And you joined—...”[break][break]

…What?[break][break]

”...You’re just giving me more questions instead of answers,” he murmured, briefly gazing through the crowds around them upon noting the full weight of her implications.[break][break]

He clicked his tongue before long, running a hand against his face.[break][break]

”...Look, can we just talk about this?”

AYAME FUJIWARA

☉

"i know, i--" [break][break]

she knows. [break][break]

so she takes a deep breath, eyes on the ground, because looking at him is starting to get too difficult. "it's for.. the best, because i've become a horrible person." she'll start to crack if she does, and she'll start to crumble if she keeps her eye on him for too long. "and you don't deserve that." but still, emotional as she is, she'll keep an eye out for prying eyes - and she knows she isn't safe. [break][break]

".. i'll explain and give you more answers, just.." she's glancing around, and paranoia is starting to fill her thoughts "not out here." and she takes another step back, her hands brought up closer to her chest. [break][break]

it was really for the best, she'll tell herself. even if he doesn't believe it. even if she doesn't believe it.

Asahiko Hakuryuu

☉

…Was she truly trying to dictate a decision that had been his to make? Declaring herself as ‘horrible,’ or even telling him what he had and hadn’t deserved.[break][break]

Not only had it been unsupported in the slightest as far as he was concerned, but they had simply been things he’d figured only warranted his judgment. It was only natural since it supposedly affected the way he viewed her.[break][break]

”...Lead the way, then.” The words were confused, borderlining impatient. He furrowed his brows as a pensive gaze lingered upon her, and he flicked his wrist faintly as a means to go on. ”I’m waiting.”

AYAME FUJIWARA

☉

she's panicking. [break][break]

and he doesn't deserve this, not when her mind is scattered, and confused, and panicked, because he got to see her here. how can she tel him that she left for the sake of revenge? how can she tell him that she thinks that this would be the best for them, that it'd be for the best that they walked their separate ways? [break][break]

of course she'll learn that it's not for the best, but she's panicked, and doesn't know what to say, or what to do, or how to get him to leave when he just wants to talk - she's just in an echo chamber that tells her vehemently that he doesn't deserve this. [break][break]

ayame needs to calm down, but she can't look him in the eye. he never liked it when she couldn't do that. she's not as good at regulating her emotions as he was. [break][break]

she never was. [break][break]

"i joined rocket" she repeats, though she knows he'll ask why, and it's something that makes it harder for her to look him in the eye for. ".. for revenge. and i didn't want to drag you into this, or.. to implicate you."

Asahiko Hakuryuu

☉

Though there was some degree of understanding that resonated within him upon noting her words, he couldn’t help but note a number of smaller discrepancies within her line of logic. It prompted his brows to remain furrowed as her thoughts met his ears, all while bicolored hues narrowed faintly as if further emphasizing a sense of pensiveness.[break][break]

”And…if your words are true, how would that have changed anything…?” he murmured, his eyes lingering upon her as they walked along. ”Rocket or not, our histories and deeds have still plagued us with plenty of implications.”[break][break]

His gaze drifted to the grounds beneath them in thought, his arms crossing absentmindedly.[break][break]

”...You’re giving explanations that don’t measure up, nor do they make sense.”

AYAME FUJIWARA

☉