trying unfathomably hard to live | m

i used to dream in the dark of palisades park

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sunny.html

nick

he/him

december 12th

petalburg

pansexual

ranger

bird keeper

please don't forget me

and all the things we did

5'11" height

i saw the end, and it looks like the middle

awards

131 posts

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TAG WITH @nicholas

nicholas steele

trying unfathomably hard to live | m

POSTED ON Nov 1, 2024 4:45:56 GMT

[nospaces]

[attr="class","nick"]

[attr="class","body"]

102 is a strange place, these days. no longer the bustling path it once was, but a warzone, scorched earth underfoot. there's a silence in the air, anticipation simmering in the bones of the earth, sun casting a blood-red glow over the upturned soil. or perhaps that's just the remains of a once grand tree, collapsed in on itself, scattered across the dirt. sometimes, it's hard to tell.[break][break]

it's even harder when he can hear the distant rumble of explosions, echoing in his bones. rocket, likely, tearing down the heart of petalburg once again. he can't help but feel a sick sort of anger curl in his gut at the idea that they're the reason he has no home, the reason he can't find respite. not that he deserves it.[break][break]

nick breathes in shakily, and steps forward regardless, boots hitting the dry earth with a surprising lack of sound. he can still feel the way his heart throbs in his chest, feel the thin sheen of sweat beginning to prickle at the back of his neck despite the chilling air. he can feel his body's innate desire to flee, to take off, to run and never look back.[break][break]

he ignores it. after all, that's what he's here for. that's what he always does. pushing forward, helping where he can, even if nobody really wants him around. the rangers certainly don't, in this war. he's only here because he was once one of team rocket, because he knows their movement patterns, knows how to spot a disturbance in the dirt. he isn't trusted, just useful, and that's the most he can ask for. at least, that's his view of it.[break][break]

so, he does as he's told, setting up for observation on the edge of route 102, and settles into his work, gaze flickering across every curve and divot and disturbance. though his thoughts and feelings may be tumultuous and terrible, roiling like a stormy sea, his surface remains placid, still, unyielding. in the end, he is still a ranger. he will do his duty, and he will do it well.[break][break]

and, eventually, someone else arrives. a rookie, he assumes, from the way they carry themselves. nick doesn't blame them, doesn't even turn to look at them. instead, he simply nods, acknowledging their presence with a quick duck of his chin. he doesn't know what to say, isn't even sure if he's capable of words right now.[break][break]

"nicholas steele," he says finally, voice quiet and even despite the choking humidity, aching breeze, the terrible breeze of smoke rising from petalburg. he speaks as though they are not sitting on the edge of the abyss. "...are you the one they assigned here too?"

Blossom Delier[break][break]

NOTES

- n/a

[attr="class","pkmn"]

[attr="class","credit"]

MADE BY GUNSMILE

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played by

ranya

bloss, bloom

she/her

twenty-one

may 18

dendemille town, kalos

bisexual

ranger

flower-picking girl

dear old world

you are very lovely, and i am glad to be alive in you.

5'4'' / 164 cm height

and the secret garden bloomed and bloomed and every morning revealed new miracles.

awards

33 posts

DOLLARS

part of

TAG WITH @blossom

Blossom Delier

trying unfathomably hard to live | m

POSTED ON Nov 1, 2024 4:48:00 GMT

[nospaces]

[attr="class","blossomdelier blossom"]

[attr="class","credits"][attr="class","fas fa-cookie-bite"]

[attr="class","banner"]

[attr="class","mlyric"]
if you look the right way

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you can see that the whole world is a garden

[attr="class","tagline"]
mission

[attr="class","textbox"]

Although Blossom is flanked by her Comfey on one side and her Meganium on the other, both of their soothing fragrances wafting down the woodland trail, she still feels uneasy. She is not one to worry usually, but it is hard not to be concerned — and even afraid — while she passes the familiar scenery of Route 102; familiar yet strange, marred by fire and violence as it has been. The roads near her home could never become unrecognizable, but her heart aches to see how they have been (and still are) hurt. The sight is so grievous that she could weep for it.

[break][break]

Yet, she is determined not to. There is work to be done, and she has been entrusted with doing it in spite of her inexperience. She will not fail her assignment, will not squander the faith placed in her by rangers and civilians — her dear neighbors, gods be good — alike. Nonetheless, her own faith is shaken, though nothing out of the ordinary has happened yet. All of this is already out of the ordinary, she thinks, but that is no reason to be paralyzed like a Deerling in headlights.

[break][break]

The thought of Deerling causes her heart to ache once more, now with longing and sorrow, but her Darjeeling has such a gentle soul. They have been at each other's sides for most of their lives, true, and her partner would bravely face anything that Blossom asked her to. Yet that is precisely why she will not ask. It is bad enough that one of them must grieve.

[break][break]

Besides, she is not alone. Her sweet Consoude calls in worry and offers her a posey from its garland, while Géranium lowers his great head to nuzzle her. Blossom takes the flower, tucks it behind her ear with a watery laugh, and leans against the Meganium. She will have a mentor too, one she should be eager to learn from.

[break][break]

The young woman gathers herself and walks onward, the Comfey close by her side while the Meganium moves away to breathe new life into the scorched earth before her eyes. That is right. She is not alone; and she can, they can, make a difference. She moved across the seas and settled down thousands of miles away from the windmills of her heart to do that, did she not? She cannot falter before the first real trial.

[break][break]

More importantly... Géranium may be working a miracle, but the forest would have grown back on its own with time. The trees are strong and deep roots are not reached by the frost, she must not forget. She never will again, the Ranger swears to herself as they arrive and she halts to witness this small wonder. Géranium knows his limits as well as she, if not better, yet he is determined to restore as much as he can for her sake. The sight is so lovely that she could weep for it.

[break][break]

Instead Blossom answers, her voice quiet but resolute, "Yes, sir, I am." She does not flaunt her Meganium's efforts but murmurs simply, "Tu en as fait assez, mon cœur. Repose-toi maintenant." Whilst he comes to lay at her feet she adds, "Blossom Delier."

[attr="class","nbox"]

NOTES[break]

[attr="class","ctag"]nicholas steele

— Hover artwork by オッフトゥン[break]
— 1/5+ posts required

[attr="class","line2"]

[attr="class","banner"]

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💐 ♂ géranium / overgrow / petal dance, petal blizzard, reflect, light screen, safeguard, return

✨ ♀ consoude / flower veil / flower shield, floral healing, grassy terrain, grass knot, magic coat, protect

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close tab

played by

sunny.html

nick

he/him

december 12th

petalburg

pansexual

ranger

bird keeper

please don't forget me

and all the things we did

5'11" height

i saw the end, and it looks like the middle

awards

131 posts

DOLLARS

part of

TAG WITH @nicholas

nicholas steele

trying unfathomably hard to live | m

POSTED ON Nov 1, 2024 4:49:28 GMT

[nospaces]

[attr="class","nick"]

[attr="class","body"]

there is a moment where nick doesn't know how to respond.[break][break]

he is still watching her pokemon, watching life return to the earth in real time, slow and agonizing and painfully beautiful. it's hypnotic, in a way, an island of vibrant green amidst a sea of destruction, and he can't help but feel drawn to it regardless. there is life, still. there is goodness in the world, still, even when things seem darkest.[break][break]

god, how he wishes he knew where to find it.[break][break]

he is silent for a long moment, breaths coming slow and even, almost meditative. he can feel his heartbeat in his chest, feel the way it thrums against his ribcage like the beating of a hummingbird's wings, desperate and fragile and alive, alive, alive. he feels pinned in place, unable to look away from the new growth, unable to speak, unable to even breathe.[break][break]

it's her voice that breaks him out of his reverie, soft and quiet and yet somehow still filled with conviction. he turns to face her, watches as she speaks to her pokemon, watches the way they respond to her. the way they love her.[break][break]

it hurts to see, almost. it's been years since he's had that kind of bond with anyone, human or pokemon. no one has looked at him like that since... since...[break][break]

he pushes the thought away before it can take root, focusing instead on the woman before him. "blossom delier," he repeats, voice still quiet, still even. he offers her a small smile, but it doesn't quite reach his eyes, doesn't quite chase away the shadows that linger there. "it's nice to meet you. though i wish it were under... better circumstances."[break][break]

he gestures to the burnt forest around them, to the smoke rising in the distance, and something flickers in his eyes, dark and distant and full of regret. "are you ready? this isn't an easy assignment. this isn't an easy war. you're young, and... it's okay to be scared."

Blossom Delier[break][break]

NOTES

- n/a

[attr="class","pkmn"]

[attr="class","credit"]

MADE BY GUNSMILE

close tab

played by

ranya

bloss, bloom

she/her

twenty-one

may 18

dendemille town, kalos

bisexual

ranger

flower-picking girl

dear old world

you are very lovely, and i am glad to be alive in you.

5'4'' / 164 cm height

and the secret garden bloomed and bloomed and every morning revealed new miracles.

awards

33 posts

DOLLARS

part of

TAG WITH @blossom

Blossom Delier

trying unfathomably hard to live | m

POSTED ON Nov 24, 2024 5:47:48 GMT

[nospaces]

[attr="class","blossomdelier blossom"]

[attr="class","credits"][attr="class","fas fa-cookie-bite"]

[attr="class","banner"]

[attr="class","mlyric"]
if you look the right way

[attr="class","mlyric2"]
you can see that the whole world is a garden

[attr="class","tagline"]
mission

[attr="class","textbox"]

Nicholas does not seem all too eager to step into the role of a mentor, Blossom realizes once he turns to face her. That is just as well. He's not obligated to do so, and it was presumptuous of her to assume he would. Besides, if she weren't able to at least hold her own, this task would not have been entrusted to her at all.

[break][break]

... Would it?

[break][break]

No answer comes, neither from her gods nor from her fellow man. That, too, is just as well. Instead of pressing him she simply watches the way Nicholas watches her, each of them taking the measure of the other. She wonders what he sees.

[break][break]

For her part, what Blossom sees is pain, though so well-hidden that she knows at once that she must pretend not to have caught a glimpse of it. She knows what he sees as well, or at least she can guess at it. Tearing her gaze away, she bends to caress Géranium instead. When he breaks the silence, though, she looks up. That his smile should fail to reach his eyes is unsurprising.

[break][break]

"It's nice to meet you too," she replies, her own smile just as small but entirely genuine. To his last statement, she nods, then says: "Um, how should I address you? I apologize, I'm not used to Hoenn's customs..."

[break][break]

Of course, that has very little to do with their circumstances. Yet it is easier to carry on if she doesn't acknowledge them aloud; not so much pretends they aren't there — that's impossible, when they're staring her in the face like this — as pretends that she herself doesn't mind them.

[break][break]

Nicholas has other ideas, though. Blossom's gaze falls again and it's her hand that rises instead, to beckon her Comfey nearer still. Consoude, darling that it is, doesn't only come but also lands on her, its flower garland settling around her wrist like a bracelet. The Trainer laughs, a brittle sound but a laugh all the same.

[break][break]

Then, her other hand still atop Géranium, she lifts her eyes. They are wide and frightened, with no trace of laughter left.

[break][break]

"No," she admits in a whisper, though doesn't look away, "no, I am not ready. I never thought this would be easy... but I did not think it would be this hard, either. I have never known war. I've hardly known hardship, to be honest."

[break][break]

Her free hand moves to grip Darjeeling's PokéBall, Comfey and all. The posy picker doesn't protest.

[break][break]

"But," Blossom goes on, her gaze unfaltering even as tears well up, "I vowed to make a difference, however small. For that, I am as ready as I'll ever be."

[attr="class","nbox"]

NOTES[break]

[attr="class","ctag"]nicholas steele

— Hover artwork by オッフトゥン[break]
— 2/5+ posts required

[attr="class","line2"]

[attr="class","banner"]

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