flesh, blood

i used to dream in the dark of palisades park

close tab

played by

NOODLES

NIKOLAI
HE/HIM
TWENTY-FIVE
CYBER BOY
GYM LEADER
37 height
37 height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
241 posts
part of
TAG WITH @nikolai
NIKOLAI PETROV
flesh, blood
POSTED ON Oct 30, 2018 7:46:49 GMT
NIKOLAI PETROV Avatar

WINTER

it's supposed to be cold especially in the dead of night; but tonight it isn't. it hasn't been for quite a while now.

"i'm sorry." 

his voice falls like specks of snow from the skies, drifting ever so slowly until it hits an end: the tombstones in front of him are his ends. he's on his knees; head not needing to be draped by a hood because he knows he's alone in more ways than one.

there are no more tears left to give.

"i couldn't stop them—i thought i could. fuck. i thought i could, and that's the worst part." a knot grows in his throat. "i did everything i was asked, no, told to do and it wasn't enough. i gave them my body, my soul, and it still wasn't enough.  i wasn't enough to save you." 

the flowers do little to ease his guilt. "you're dead because of me. and i have to live with that." his hands are as pale as the snow. "i'm not sure if i can." 

he rises to his feet.

"don't forgive me because i don't deserve it. i just need to know you're at peace. please. that's all i'm asking for." 

he's pleading with nothing, to nothing. it's silent for far too long before he finally speaks again.

"goodbye."
close tab

played by

NOODLES

NIKOLAI
HE/HIM
TWENTY-FIVE
CYBER BOY
GYM LEADER
37 height
37 height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
241 posts
part of
TAG WITH @nikolai
NIKOLAI PETROV
flesh, blood
POSTED ON Oct 30, 2018 16:13:21 GMT
NIKOLAI PETROV Avatar

SMALLEST

he feels their eyes: judging, glaring as he walks through the tight confines of the hallway. he feels suffocated like he's a remoraid out of water, left stranded on a deserted island with predators circling around.

once a predator now turned prey, he's left to be picked to the bones by a commissioner who's justified in their actions because after what he's done, he deserves as much.

still, it doesn't hurt any less when he's forced into an empty training room only to be confronted by four men.

"look, you have to trust me eventually." he tries to reason before resorting to violence, but a part of him knows it's inevitable. he doesn't even raise a hand to defend himself.

a strong hook sends him to the floor, breaking his nose. his hands are sprawled across the hardwood floors; blood dripping from his face. "i'm not your—" a kick to the gut makes his entire body tense up.

it doesn't take much to break a man who has nothing left to live for: punch after punch, kick after kick, blood pools but it's nothing compared to what he's reaped. when they finally stop he struggles to find his bearings. his back's against the wall but it doesn't feel like it. 

he feels their eyes: judging, glaring.

"i'm not your enemy."

he feels small.

"not anymore."
close tab

played by

NOODLES

NIKOLAI
HE/HIM
TWENTY-FIVE
CYBER BOY
GYM LEADER
37 height
37 height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
241 posts
part of
TAG WITH @nikolai
NIKOLAI PETROV
flesh, blood
POSTED ON Oct 31, 2018 4:37:12 GMT
NIKOLAI PETROV Avatar

MISTAKE

he feels the weight of the chains; literal chains, and how different he thought they'd feel: they're lighter than he expects. but it's not the metal around his wrists and ankles that confine him.

the council sits in an arch across from him. the intense light that shines on his face is blinding. peering only does so much to help but he sees their rough outlines sitting above him.

there's no jury, not today, only executioners.

"nikolai petrov. rocket beast." 

tensions are high but that's to be expected. what's not expected is how little they're talking. there's no discussion. only judgement.

'why are you here?'

he doesn't hesitate.

"to turn the tide."
close tab

played by

NOODLES

NIKOLAI
HE/HIM
TWENTY-FIVE
CYBER BOY
GYM LEADER
37 height
37 height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
241 posts
part of
TAG WITH @nikolai
NIKOLAI PETROV
flesh, blood
POSTED ON Oct 31, 2018 5:27:45 GMT
NIKOLAI PETROV Avatar

GROWTH

"are you sure? you don't have to." 

he kneels on the ground somewhere inside the depths of mount silver; there's a break in the ceiling that allows light to shine through, illuminating the darkened halls of the mountain.  in front of him are his nidorino and nidorina.

he holds two moon stones in his hands.

"don't feel like you have to! just…when you're ready, yeah?" his legs buckle under the pressure so he lowers himself to the ground. six years together and still he has doubts about his abilities. to be fair, he is just a kid.

the poison-types don't go for the stones yet. their ears prick up as they move closer. they wiggle underneath his hands, urging him for pets. he obliges.

"i just…what if something goes wrong? i'm scared things will change. i don't want things to change. i like things the way they are now!" fourteen years on this earth and he's still not prepared for change. "i know it's selfish…i just don't want to be left behind." 

the two slip away from him only to nudge the stones away with their horns. he doesn't remember crying but he wipes tears off the side of his face. he's not sure why it's taken him that long but he realizes: they're a team. a trio. they'll always be together.

"let's go home."
close tab

played by

NOODLES

NIKOLAI
HE/HIM
TWENTY-FIVE
CYBER BOY
GYM LEADER
37 height
37 height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
241 posts
part of
TAG WITH @nikolai
NIKOLAI PETROV
flesh, blood
POSTED ON Nov 2, 2018 8:07:05 GMT
NIKOLAI PETROV Avatar

ACCEPTANCE

dusk approaches as they make their way back from the mountains. for tonight, they've made a small cabin situated on the outskirts of a forest their home. a fire burns inside, aided by the constant flames on the end of charizard's tail. only nikolai is sat by the fire, warming his hands as he watches the burning wood flicker. a look of defeat taints his features.

'you'll get better. today was good.'

he doubts it: not his words, but doubts himself. he shakes his head. 

'tell me what you're feeling.'

a pause.

"like shit—" 

'language.'

"sorry. it's just…when you were my age you already had all eight badges. i know i'm in at four; i know, but i'm nowhere near as strong as you were. i can't even reach the top of the fucking mountain." 

no warnings need to be given this time. he's quick to correct himself. "language. sorry, pa." 

he feels a cold tap on his arm. he turns to see an offered bottle of beer; he takes it but there's hesitation in his movements.

'it's fine. it'll help. come, have a drink with me.'

they sit by the couch and he waits to have his drink. it's unopened but he doesn't raise it to his lips yet.

'we all move at our own pace. there's no reason for you to rush like i did; i didn't have anything or anyone then, so battling was all i had. but you're different: you have so much support. you have us, your family.'

he smiles as he raises his bottle to toast. it's his first ever drink and it's with the person he respects the most. he can't ask for anything else.

'you'll always have us.'
close tab

played by

NOODLES

NIKOLAI
HE/HIM
TWENTY-FIVE
CYBER BOY
GYM LEADER
37 height
37 height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
241 posts
part of
TAG WITH @nikolai
NIKOLAI PETROV
flesh, blood
POSTED ON Nov 17, 2018 14:07:00 GMT
NIKOLAI PETROV Avatar

VIOLENCE

the screams tell him to stop but he can't, or at least that's what he tells himself because it's easier to accept than the truth: he doesn't want to stop.

pallet's on fire and soon it'll become nothing but a forgotten speck on the map. there are those who resist; that's natural, that's human nature, but it's foolishness that makes them fight a losing battle. it's foolishness that will get them killed.

orders are orders but this feels different. he knows it's different but he doesn't want to say it because that makes it real. if it remains in his head then he can deny it for as long as he wants.

'please, stop!'

he doesn't.

"targets."

nidoking and nidoqueen lead the charge; that much hasn't changed. STONE EDGES make the difference as it pierces through resisting pokemon. beautifly: sliced in half. gardevoir: crushed against the ground. their trainers lay their weapons down, surrendering all control over to him but yet he still approaches with a hint of darkness in his eyes.

'you win! please, let them live! they're all we have left.'

they beg and plead as they lay their pokeballs that contain the rest of their team on the ground. they rid themselves of their weapons in exchange for mercy.

he doesn't give it to them.

STONE EDGES crush the pokeballs and their contents.