Memo frowned. He squeezed Alex’s hand, willing him to stay present.

“Because you want to protect her?” he asked, voice quiet, stomach spiking with a roll of nausea. This was eerily familiar to a conversation they’d had previously, in bed. Not like that! After Alex’s breakdown.

One Memo’d had to get up and leave the room for.

“Or because she’s angry?”

Because if it was the former, it didn’t seem quite fair. And he would, against all his better judgement, have to voice that thought, if it came to it. Just because he loved Alex-- yeah, using the big 'L' word here-- didn't mean he had to agree with everything Alex did.

Alexei Ivanov

The corner of his mouth quirks upwards in the tiniest little bit of a smile. “Honey,” he says, slow and warm, like what he’s about to reveal is groundbreaking, “there’s something with everyone that compels you to want to keep them safe.”

He laughs, just an exhale. “You are the world’s biggest mother hen. It’s your blessing and your curse.”

Alexei Ivanov

Memo laughs a little bit, bringing Alex’s hand between his two own, rubbing over the back of Alex’s knuckles with his thumbs. “It’s not… a problem, per se,” he says, trying to think, to choose his words carefully, “and it’s certainly not bad.”

His gaze drifts to the two Pokemon as they interacted.

“I just think sometimes. It makes you…. Vulnerable.” He finally says, then frowns. “That’s… that’s not right. It’s hard to explain. Um. You take a lot of pressure onto yourself. You blame yourself for a lot of things that are out of your control.” His caressing grew a little bit more fevered as he struggled to find the words.

Alexei Ivanov

Memo rocked forward onto his toes, smile peaking; if he’d had canine ears, they’d have perked.

“That has a nice ring to it, you know,” he quipped, boyish grin plastered across his face; it all faded, though, as Alex appeared to get choked up.

“Oh, honey,” Memo swung out in front of Alex, palm to palm, fingers intertwined; he caught the hand that was wringing at the empty air, palm to palm, fingers intertwined. “It’s not a fault to have a large, caring heart. You just… also need to balance it, sometimes. With… understanding your own limits. It’s not fair to yourself, or anyone, if you take on the weight of the world and blame yourself for things you can’t control.”

Like with Zelle's family.

Alexei Ivanov

Memo stepped back, just a few inches, and let it happen, let Alex have his space, so he could get out what he needed to get out. He felt his own eyes tearing up as Alex poured his heart-- his beautiful, huge, wonderful heart-- out into the open air, littering the Duskull with tears and apologies, crystalline, fragile, and rare.

Guillermo swallowed, forcing himself to remain calm, distant for the time; he didn’t interject to defend Alex, to say you didn’t let anyone die, like he wanted to.

After a minute or so, he reached out and gently laid a hand on Alex’s back, rubbing small circles into the span between his shoulderblades.

Alexei Ivanov

Yeah, Guillermo hadn’t missed that Alex was hugging a ghost-- something that, ninety seconds ago, would have sent him into a full-blown, passing-out panic. But Memo supposed that some traumas outweighed others-- some feelings were just heavier, needed out more.

He continues his gentle back-rubbing, pausing every few seconds to rub his thumb along the back of Alex’s neck, through the hair at his nape, then back to the space between his shoulderblades, where he can feel his ribcage heaving with sobs.

“Oh, honey,” he murmurs, fighting off his own urge to get involved, to offer comfort. This wasn’t about him, this was about Alex, and Memo would just be there when it was time to come back up for air.

Alexei Ivanov