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POSTED ON Jul 27, 2022 5:16:53 GMT

[attr="class","sawyer"]

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THEO BECKETT 
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Eight Years Prior, Age: 16

KANTO, Rocket HQ, Eight Years Ago

Failure isn't new to Ashley. Two years here, and he learned. He's learned how to fend for himself, how to use a switchblade, a gun. He's gotten a few Pokemon, but his favorite is this little Alolan Raichu that rides her tail so sweetly. No matter how cold Ashley is, she loves him all the same. Loves him and his flaws.

Ashley took his first life when he was fifteen. It was an accident, he would say. He didn't intend to pull the trigger. Even then, it was supposed to be an empty threat. A firearm with nothing loaded in it.

Someone else put the bullets in.

This matters, because the mission he failed now was an assassination. Shoot to kill a defector before she started to snitch to the League about Rocket matters, and Ashley was tasked to put her down with another Rocket member. In truth, that other Rocket member went to test Ashley. And he failed. He failed, and now he was here.

The firearm was in his hand, the barrel lined with her forehead. But he hesitated. He stopped full, unable to pull the trigger. She would ruin Rocket if she lived, but he couldn't kill her. He couldn't watch her die. He can't be the cause.

It didn't matter though. Shot dead. The Rocket testing him did it remorselessly, and Ashley's face was coated in her blood from close proximity, staining him as an accomplice. He still can't wash the blood off. Two showers later, he can't stop seeing her in the mirror. He can't stop seeing it as his fault.

"I'm all talk."

He is. He has no spine. He has nothing. He hates blood, he hates everything about himself now. Is this what everyone here felt? No, everyone else was loyal like an Arcanine. Ask them to jump, they jump. Ask them to steal, they steal. Ask them to kill, and they do it without flinching. Ashley is not Rocket. He jumps, he steals, and he hesitates when it gets bloody..

He sat in a room. A single chair, and a light peering in from above. Like he was a prisoner for his lack of loyalty. Someone would be here soon to punish him.

"... anyone but him." He whispers. Silver eyes downcast. He'd know by the shoes alone...

If he walks through those doors though...

[attr="class","wizzcred"]❤ wizz

[newclass=".sawyer"] [/newclass]
[newclass=".sawyer b"]color:#00BFFF; font-weight:lighter; [/newclass]
[newclass=".sawyer i"]color:#00BFFF; font-style:italic; [/newclass]
[newclass=".sawyer a"]text-transform:uppercase; [/newclass]
[newclass=".wizzcred"]font: monospace; font-size: 10px; color:#7a7a7a;[/newclass]
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beck

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POSTED ON Jul 27, 2022 8:43:35 GMT

[attr="class","beck"]the door opens, and in walks theo, expression never straying from the regular indifference ashley should be more than familiar with by now.

silence overpowers them as the door slides shut, leaving them to their own, and for a long while, theo says nothing.

finally:

"explain."

[attr="class","noodles"]Ashley Shepard

[newclass=.beck] text-align: justify; font-size: 12px; } .beck b { color: #716075; font-size: 13px; } .beck u { color: #b5b5b5; font-style: italic; text-decoration: underline dotted #716075; font-size: 13px; } .beck a { font-family: inherit; font-size: medium; font-weight: bold; text-transform: uppercase; } .beck .noodles { margin: 0; padding: 5px 0; } .beck .noodles img { max-width: 100%; max-height: 100%; border: none; outline: none; margin: 0; padding: 0; display: inline; float: none; } .beck .noodles .pkmn { display: inline; } .beck .noodles .inactive { filter: grayscale(1); -webkit-filter: grayscale(1); [/newclass]

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Ash

He/Him/Them

December 2

Aspertia City, Unova

Pansexual

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POSTED ON Jul 27, 2022 9:44:01 GMT

[attr="class","sawyer"]

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THEO BECKETT   
notes
Eight Years Prior, Age: 16

KANTO, Rocket HQ, Eight Years Ago

Great. It was Theo McFucking Beckett. Like the piece of shit father he never wanted, had, or needed. Ashley respected him once, but that respect soured recently.

Ashley focuses on him. He doesn't peel himself away. That long, uncomfortable silence lingers far too long. He knows he's about to get punished, but the fact that it's Theo only makes it worse.

When the question is asked, he winces.

"Couldn't do it."

Ashley has become much more obedient in the last two years with Rocket. Some say he mellowed out from the rebel he came in as. He's nowhere near perfect, but if every other loyal member is like an Arcanine, he's like a Houndoom; every bit Fire Type, but not non-conforming with a hint of Dark.

"But you already know that, sir." He says 'sir' with the level discontent he learned to associate with Theo. He doesn't stand. He doesn't throw a punch. He just focuses.

[attr="class","wizzcred"]❤ wizz

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beck

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POSTED ON Jul 28, 2022 9:55:54 GMT

[attr="class","beck"]they've come a long way in the two years since their first encounter. from gramps to sir — the way it should be. the way loyalties demand.

a step forward takes him closer to ashley.

"why not?"

[attr="class","noodles"]Ashley Shepard

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Kiwi

Ash

He/Him/Them

December 2

Aspertia City, Unova

Pansexual

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5'11'' height

But I, I will, go on howling and hollow

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POSTED ON Jul 29, 2022 2:10:35 GMT

[attr="class","sawyer"]

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THEO BECKETT     
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Eight Years Prior, Age: 16

KANTO, Rocket HQ, Eight Years Ago

Ashley stares into the distance. A thousand yard stare as he repeats the memory. "The way her eyes looked at mine... I didn't see a traitor, I saw a scared woman begging for her life. She was as scared as I was. No matter how close my finger was to the trigger, I couldn't. Pulling it meant... I didn't care anymore."

He sits hunched over, hands between his open legs as his silver eyes go up to Theo. He takes a second to look him dead in the eyes. He is serious. His resolve is shaken, but is stands strong.

"I accept whatever punishment I deserve. But I won't kill."

He accepted that fate.

[attr="class","wizzcred"]❤ wizz

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beck

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POSTED ON Jul 30, 2022 11:27:29 GMT

[attr="class","beck"]"you aren't meant to care."

caring leads to situations like this one, sometimes far worse. ashley had been lucky the other rocket operative was there to finish what he could not.

"if you won't kill, then you are of no use to us. so why would we keep you on?"

[attr="class","noodles"]Ashley Shepard

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Kiwi

Ash

He/Him/Them

December 2

Aspertia City, Unova

Pansexual

Picking up the pieces

5'11'' height

But I, I will, go on howling and hollow

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POSTED ON Aug 1, 2022 8:38:23 GMT

[attr="class","sawyer"]

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THEO BECKETT       
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Eight Years Prior, Age: 16

KANTO, Rocket HQ, Eight Years Ago

So what... he just lets it go? Ashley walks? He wouldn't be able to make it out of here without a scar. The problem is, he has to man up. He has to grow the spine, even if it means becoming an uncaring machine. He feels himself begin to speak.

"I-"

Would they kill him? He realizes the gravity of his own situation. Right now, he was a liability. Theo was right, what did they need with someone who can't kill?

He gets up from his chair. If the only way forward is to dirty his hands and commit the deed, or to die, he picks life. No matter what that entails.

"Give me another chance. I... I can do it. Surely you have to have another traitor." Can he make true on his promise? He doesn't know.

He forgets himself, and stands at attention. "Sir. If there is any other way to prove myself, I will do it. I'll even do it in front of you."

[attr="class","wizzcred"]❤ wizz

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beck

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POSTED ON Aug 3, 2022 1:14:15 GMT

[attr="class","beck"]the pleads do little to change theo's stance on the matter. what may change depends on just how far ashley is willing to go.

they've spent enough time together for theo to remember certain things. like ashley's preferred pokemon.

"call out your raichu."

[attr="class","noodles"]Ashley Shepard

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Kiwi

Ash

He/Him/Them

December 2

Aspertia City, Unova

Pansexual

Picking up the pieces

5'11'' height

But I, I will, go on howling and hollow

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TAG WITH @ashley

POSTED ON Aug 3, 2022 1:43:33 GMT

[attr="class","sawyer"]

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THEO BECKETT          
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Eight Years Prior, Age: 16

KANTO, Rocket HQ, Eight Years Ago

Ashley reaches into his pocket, the Pokeball expanding into his hand, as he throws the ball out. He would do anything for his spot here. He just came to terms with anything. Once Jubilee is out, he holds onto her, and feels himself sweetly smile. He still had that innocence.

She nuzzles into him, and he could feel that static of her cheek, he looks to Theo confidently. He was ready to do whatever was necessary to prove himself.

"Who, sir? We're ready."

He asks this, feeling the answer slowly creep upon his mind. Ashley is too dumb to see it coming though. Even if that bad feeling begins to weigh down on him.

[attr="class","wizzcred"]❤ wizz

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noodles

beck

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thirty-eight

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POSTED ON Aug 3, 2022 2:38:04 GMT

[attr="class","beck"]theo walks back over to his desk to pull open the top drawer of his desk. he reaches in, pauses for a moment, then pulls out a gun. the drawer slides shut.

"not who."

he takes a step back before offering ashley the firearm. his hand gestures at the raichu floating beside them.

"go on."

[attr="class","noodles"]Ashley Shepard

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Ash

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December 2

Aspertia City, Unova

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POSTED ON Aug 3, 2022 3:36:39 GMT

THEO BECKETT likes this

[attr="class","sawyer"]

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THEO BECKETT            
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Eight Years Prior, Age: 16

KANTO, Rocket HQ, Eight Years Ago

The gun comes out.

He hesitates, offered the firearm. The gesture to Jubilee. The Raichu doesn't understand. Ashley feels everything crash around him. His hands shiver, his body shivers, his face pales, his body pales, his life pales. Yet, there was the choice. There it was, he has to do it, he has to kill her.

The pistol hits his hand, and he can feel it. His heart is in his throat. Yet, no matter how much he looks at Theo, no matter how much he wants not to, here it is. The choice. This was always how it was going to go. He feels the barrel, he tells him no, no. No, he has to say yes, if he doesn't, he will be a traitor. It was an order, an order in order to bring some order, to gain some trust back, disorder in order to stay on board. He feels the barrel, he feels how cold it is, how ruthless it is, how much pain it must be to be on the other end of it is. He can't breathe, he won't breathe, he's no longer trying. He's dying, death frees him, living is a crime.

And there she is.

She smiles to him. She is innocent. She is innocent, and he has to take her away. He opens his mouth, and there's nothing to say. Nothing to say. He can fight back, he could aim it at him, he considers it. But then he's dead. Theo is everything he has to be. He accepted this life two years ago, when he cared for nothing.

Then he grew to care, and now he has to remind himself what he is.

He raises the pistol up.

He can't see straight, his eyes are watering. He can't breathe. He can't do it, but he has to, because if he doesn't, it's over. He has to do it. He has to convince himself. YOU HAVE TO. YOU HAVE TO SHOOT. YOU CAN'T BACK DOWN, YOU GOT TOO MUCH TO LOSE. WHAT DO YOU FIGHT FOR? WHAT DO YOU LIVE FOR? IS THIS LITTLE RAICHU ENOUGH TO LET YOUR LIFE HIT THE FLOOR? SHE DIES IF YOU DO, BUT YOU DIE IF YOU DON'T, AND YOU WON'T SEE IF SHE MAKES IT AFTER YOU FALL. PULL THE TRIGGER. PULL THE TRIGGER. PULL THE TRIGGER, ASH. IT'LL ALL BE OVER, ALL IN A- Bang.

Ashley collapses to his knees.

He drops the gun.

His hands will never be clean.

And he screams, blood pooling below him. She's gone now.

[attr="class","wizzcred"]❤ wizz

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beck

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TAG WITH @theo

POSTED ON Aug 4, 2022 10:10:16 GMT

[attr="class","beck"]in that brief moment of hesitation where the gun remains pointed at the raichu, theo sees himself in ashley even if the circumstances are far different.

but then again, are they really?

theo had been subjected to the same torment, the same choice of either killing or be killed. he remembers the barn. he remembers his family tied up. he remembers jayden cross's father handing him the gun and telling him to make his choice.

kill one and the rest will live.

except it didn't turn out that way.

blood pools as the scream rings loud in the room. the silence that follows is even louder.

"as i've made abundantly clear time and time again, there are consequences when you fail. this is one of them."

[attr="class","noodles"]Ashley Shepard

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Kiwi

Ash

He/Him/Them

December 2

Aspertia City, Unova

Pansexual

Picking up the pieces

5'11'' height

But I, I will, go on howling and hollow

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TAG WITH @ashley

POSTED ON Aug 7, 2022 9:04:00 GMT

[attr="class","sawyer"]

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THEO BECKETT              
notes
Eight Years Prior, Age: 16

KANTO, Rocket HQ, Eight Years Ago

There are no more words for Ashley. He's ripped his vocal chords with that intensity. His eyes are glazed, his face matted in sweat. He could see those paws. Those happy little eyes, even now, filled with light. He snuffed it out, tore that light out. He ripped it out of himself. His fault. His fault. It's your fault.

There are consequences for failure, and Jubilee had to die or Ashley and Jubilee both would. Now he would fall in line, right?

Every bad thought came to him as he looked at Theo. Ashley's eyes were pouring tears, cascading like the waterfall of pain they spouted from. He looked at Theo now, and could only think of every nasty thing he would do to leave Theo dead. It was justice. Justice. What was justice? Justice was vengeance.

But to allow Jubilee's death to mean nothing... no... for now, as he faces years more of Rocket, he gets onto his feet. His glare hardened, his resolve shaken, broken, and now reforged.

"Yes sir."

But he would not lose himself. His desire for vengeance would be his fuel, but he would not let it consume him. He would walk. His feet on the ground, each step forward, his eyes cast forward, and the trail of blood behind him.

One day. He swears, eyes hateful towards Theo.

I will make you suffer.

[attr="class","wizzcred"]❤ wizz

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beck

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thirty-eight

march 11th

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TAG WITH @theo