found you [s, c]

i used to dream in the dark of palisades park

close tab

played by

Ceej

Memo
He/him
28
August 26
Spikemuth, Galar Region
Homosexual
Ranger Captain
Elite Ranger
it gets lonely in this gangster's paradise
awards
1,175 posts
part of
TAG WITH @memo
Guillermo Marceliño
found you [s, c]
POSTED ON Aug 28, 2022 22:17:31 GMT
Guillermo Marceliño Avatar
[attr="class","samcam"]


It was a mad dash from the shores of the Mirage Island to the Fortree ER, during which time Memo held on to 's wrists for dear life. Alex had been in and out of consciousness the entire time, and Memo just talked, talked the nerves out, talked to fill the silence, talked to make sure Alex didn’t--

--he was sure Gabe wanted to eat him, but they could deal with that later.

His own nose had stopped bleeding but the blood from Alex’s mouth had maintained a steady trickle the entire way, even though Memo had used part of Alex’s scarf to try and stem it. Without knowing what happened when Alex went into the light (god, that was terrifying) he couldn’t know what was wrong with him. It could be something as innocent as a bit tongue, but with Alex’s haemophilia…

(If Memo thought too much about what happened, in that digital hellscape, he came very close to openly weeping, and throwing up, and maybe just a little bit considering throwing himself off the dragon at a very high altitude. So he did not think about it.)

The Fortree ER, like most emergency rooms in the world, had a landing pad for Flying-types and Memo had called ahead to announce their arrival (though the emergency operator had a hell of a time understanding him with a fucked up nose.) Thankfully, a team was waiting for them to land, and, ever efficient, Alex was off the dragon and on a stretcher in seconds as they hustled him into the hospital proper.

Guillermo tried to follow after, tried to tell them (how could he tell them?!) at the very least that Alex had a condition, but a few nurses blocked his path and told him they had it handled, thanks. Obviously they knew. There was a reason Alex only ever wanted to go to two hospitals in the entire region.

Anyway, a nurse sat Memo down in an adjunct room (just a tiny thing for vitals and screening) and went to work cleaning up his face. They gave him an ice water and told him to have a seat, they’d keep him informed.

So it was more waiting. Memo’s stomach felt like it was processing glass. He didn’t touch the water and it soaked all the way through the styrafoam cup.

On the ride over he’d swiped Alex’s phone (since the guy was more or less leaning on him the entire time) so he texted that they’d made it to the ER and he was waiting for news and also, this is Guillermo and, also also, he’s really sorry for being literally a monster, she could punch him again later if that made her feel better.

And so he waited. He waited and waited and waited and tried desperately to not think about what had transpired through the whirlpool. He waited and waited and waited and tried desperately to not think about Alex dying. He waited and waited and waited.

He’d counted to a thousand when a nurse came out, shook his hand, and ushered him down the hall into a room, where Alex, pale as death, lay on a bed; he was hooked up to a blood bag and a regular IV. The doctor came in and introduced himself and said they’d done a CT scan to check for internal bleeding and he’d needed more than one transfusion and the Chansey had been in and he was stable, for now, though his prognosis was guarded.

Memo thanked them, and they left, and he scooted a chair as close to Alex’s bedside as he could possibly get and sat down, terrified, somehow even more terrified now that he could see him. He didn’t want to touch him because he didn’t know what hurt. He didn’t want to touch him because he didn’t feel worthy.
[newclass=.samcam] [/newclass][newclass=.samcam b] color: #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam i] color: #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam u] text-decoration: none;border-bottom: dashed 1px #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam a] text-transform:uppercase!important;font:800 15px Poppins!important; [/newclass]
close tab

played by

Ven

Alex / Lexy
he / him / his
thirty
december 22
Mistralton, Unova
homosexual demiromantic
fortree gym leader
gym leader
חקל דמא
awards
5,045 posts
part of
TAG WITH @alexei
Alexei Ivanov
found you [s, c]
POSTED ON Aug 29, 2022 17:00:55 GMT
Alexei Ivanov Avatar


The migraine that was assaulting him was stemming from the back of his head was one of the main reasons his attention was wavering from the waking world to the unconscious. He belatedly registered the fact that he was no longer in the sand, but flying through the—through the air.

Wait, what was going on…?

He could hear Memo’s voice coming in and out, but he couldn’t catch onto what he was talking about. The longer they were out here, the more he could feel the pain radiating all over his body—his arms felt like lead, he could barely register where they were headed—

If they were in the air they were definitely headed somewhere.

The taste of iron was getting stronger in his mouth, and he’d passed out from the sensory overload not too long after that.

Several broken ribs and internal bleeding. Was it because of what happened in the space where he’d ‘fought’ with his doppelganger?

He didn’t know he’d lost so much blood, but for someone like him, that alone was very dangerous, given what and how his situation was like.

Was he dying again—and this time, was it going to be for real?

Maybe it was a good thing they’d made it back to Fortree sooner and not later otherwise it would’ve been too late for him by then.

The very first thing he registered was the fact that—the pain was still there, but not as painful as it had been earlier.

Although, his body felt so heavy the exhaustion was still there, radiating from no particular point—it was like lying down on a bed of broken glass and being sandwiched by an equally-painful bed of nails determined to rip him apart and undo what had been restored back to reality—

The brightness of everything meant he kept his eyes closed, because even just peeking a tiny little fraction made him wince. The whiteness was just too much for his eyes to take at the moment.

“Where…” he rasped out, his throat felt like it was stuffed with too much cotton it just hurt to speak above a whisper.

close tab

played by

Ceej

Memo
He/him
28
August 26
Spikemuth, Galar Region
Homosexual
Ranger Captain
Elite Ranger
it gets lonely in this gangster's paradise
awards
1,175 posts
part of
TAG WITH @memo
Guillermo Marceliño
found you [s, c]
POSTED ON Aug 29, 2022 19:01:31 GMT
Guillermo Marceliño Avatar
[attr="class","samcam"]


Memo had his hands clasped together in front of him, and had been squeezing them for so long his fingers felt all tingly. Over the little bit of time he’d been in ’s hospital room, general fatigue had caught up to him, though he was still very awake, strung out and wired by anxiety.

Still, his everything hurt, and his back was panging from sitting hunched in the chair for so long. His chin had dipped and was resting on the bed, puppy-dog eyes staring up at Alex’s face, waiting for any sign of consciousness.

So when he finally spoke, after what seemed like hours, Memo was primed and ready to leap into action. There was another styrofoam cup with ice water on the bedside table, and even though Alex was hooked up to an IV drip, he was probably still parched.

“H-hey,” Memo said, bending the straw and holding the cup at the ready, a shaky smile on his face, voice wrecked from crying and sounding like he was about to start doing so again at any moment, “we-- we’re at the Fortree hospital.”

He would stick to just answering questions for now. Any of his own (how are you doing? How do you feel?) just sounded hollow.

[newclass=.samcam] [/newclass][newclass=.samcam b] color: #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam i] color: #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam u] text-decoration: none;border-bottom: dashed 1px #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam a] text-transform:uppercase!important;font:800 15px Poppins!important; [/newclass]
close tab

played by

Ven

Alex / Lexy
he / him / his
thirty
december 22
Mistralton, Unova
homosexual demiromantic
fortree gym leader
gym leader
חקל דמא
awards
5,045 posts
part of
TAG WITH @alexei
Alexei Ivanov
found you [s, c]
POSTED ON Aug 29, 2022 23:03:22 GMT
Alexei Ivanov Avatar


His lips were so cracked and parched, it was a miracle he was able to find the straw with a very limited field of vision. It was still way too bright for his eyes to be handling this.

“Th-that’s good to hear,” he continued quietly as his left hand fumbled around trying to reach for the straw—he would kill for a good, long drink of water right about now.

“I f-feel like… I got hit by a truck. Are…are you okay?” he followed up after taking a deep breath and realizing—ow, ow, fucking ow, it hurt to do that. Shallow breaths it would be, for now.

“You sound so…upset.”

Oh, if he only knew what really happened in the latter half of everything that went down at the Mirage Island…


close tab

played by

Ceej

Memo
He/him
28
August 26
Spikemuth, Galar Region
Homosexual
Ranger Captain
Elite Ranger
it gets lonely in this gangster's paradise
awards
1,175 posts
part of
TAG WITH @memo
Guillermo Marceliño
found you [s, c]
POSTED ON Aug 29, 2022 23:21:38 GMT
Guillermo Marceliño Avatar
[attr="class","samcam"]

Memo hopped to with a little grunt of surprise, gently guiding Alex’s hand to the styrofoam and assisting him in taking a drink, hands hovering in case he needed any more help.

“You, um.” He swallowed, voice breaking, but he would not cry now, he would not. “You look great. For. F-for, you know. Being kinda beat up.” He was trying to put a Memo Classic Positive Spin(™) on current events. It came off wavery and wanting.

He twitched when Alex inhaled, hands hovering uselessly (he was so useless) again, before realizing there wasn’t really much he could do. He leaned back a centimeter.

“I’m fine,” he lied, forcing a smile, “just… it was a lot. What you went through.”

I love you. You said 'I love you' and then you died for us.

[newclass=.samcam] [/newclass][newclass=.samcam b] color: #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam i] color: #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam u] text-decoration: none;border-bottom: dashed 1px #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam a] text-transform:uppercase!important;font:800 15px Poppins!important; [/newclass]
close tab

played by

Ven

Alex / Lexy
he / him / his
thirty
december 22
Mistralton, Unova
homosexual demiromantic
fortree gym leader
gym leader
חקל דמא
awards
5,045 posts
part of
TAG WITH @alexei
Alexei Ivanov
found you [s, c]
POSTED ON Aug 29, 2022 23:55:24 GMT
Alexei Ivanov Avatar


“I feel like…shit,” were the next words out of his mouth as he gratefully took a long sip of water, licking his cracked lips afterward.

“Like I got ran through… I don’t know why.”

He tried another deep breath but ow, ow, fucking ow it really hurt. Yeah, definitely no deep breaths from him for now.

It was at this time he dared to open his eyes just a little bit—and if the other was fast enough, instead of seeing a gaping hole of glitched nothingness, the lilac-hued eyes the other had grown to love would peek back at him. Although, there was something missing—the usual light that made up who he was.

Like the life had gotten sucked out of them.

“It hurts…when I breathe. Did…did they say anything about…what happened to me? My…memory’s a blur.”


close tab

played by

Ceej

Memo
He/him
28
August 26
Spikemuth, Galar Region
Homosexual
Ranger Captain
Elite Ranger
it gets lonely in this gangster's paradise
awards
1,175 posts
part of
TAG WITH @memo
Guillermo Marceliño
found you [s, c]
POSTED ON Aug 30, 2022 0:15:07 GMT
Guillermo Marceliño Avatar
[attr="class","samcam"]

“You have broken ribs, love, be careful,” Memo warned, passing on what the doctors had discovered. “They did a CT scan to check for internal bleeding and you’ve gotten at least one liter of blood transfused.” He wanted to reach out and touch Alex’s hair, but he just pressed his fist into his thigh, sat, and was useless. “You’ve been through a lot,” he repeated, not very helpfully.

“Hold on.” Memo got up and stepped to the light switch, dimming it down as low as it could go, then heading around the bed to tug the curtains closed-- pausing briefly at the horde of avians perched outside. “Sorry, gang. I’ll open them soon,” he apologized, then sealed the curtains, bathing the room in darkness. The ambient light from the hallway lit everything faintly lavender.

“How much do… do you remember?” Memo asked, returning to his seat. “Or… what’s the last thing?” He swallowed. “Or we don’t have to talk about it right now, if you don’t feel up to it.”

[newclass=.samcam] [/newclass][newclass=.samcam b] color: #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam i] color: #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam u] text-decoration: none;border-bottom: dashed 1px #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam a] text-transform:uppercase!important;font:800 15px Poppins!important; [/newclass]
close tab

played by

Ven

Alex / Lexy
he / him / his
thirty
december 22
Mistralton, Unova
homosexual demiromantic
fortree gym leader
gym leader
חקל דמא
awards
5,045 posts
part of
TAG WITH @alexei
Alexei Ivanov
found you [s, c]
POSTED ON Aug 30, 2022 1:03:13 GMT
Alexei Ivanov Avatar


“What—”

Only then does his lagging brain catch up, before Memo had the werewithal to turn down the lights and close the curtains—for some reason he thought he heard chirping coming from the window as the curtains were slid shut—and the whiteness in the room was more muted, now.

He then cracked his eyes open slowly, slowly—letting the darkness adjust to them, before he finally managed a full blink and his brain registered what the other had said.

“I lost…that much…?” he trailed off, looking down at his right arm and finally noticing the two IV lines that were installed there.

Oh.

“N-no wonder it hurts if… if I inhale too much,” he croaked out, licking his drying lips again. Not because he wanted to be kissed, but because he couldn’t get them to stay moist.

His next question made him stop for a bit. Maybe it was because of the sedatives in his system he was thinking a lot slower than usual, but he closed his eyes as he tried to remember…

“I know…for a fact, it wasn’t just us… we were with Kaida, right?” he recalled, faintly remembering the other on the back of her Araquanid, approaching them as mass chaos broke out.

“And then… a train. A loud, noisy train… headed right at us. Is… is that right?”

He looked over at the other man for confirmation, his left hand trying to reach for the other’s hand to take in his own.

with some slight mentions of , hi fam

close tab

played by

Ceej

Memo
He/him
28
August 26
Spikemuth, Galar Region
Homosexual
Ranger Captain
Elite Ranger
it gets lonely in this gangster's paradise
awards
1,175 posts
part of
TAG WITH @memo
Guillermo Marceliño
found you [s, c]
POSTED ON Aug 30, 2022 2:34:26 GMT
Guillermo Marceliño Avatar
[attr="class","samcam"]

“I don’t… actually know what happened, after you stepped into the light,” Guillermo says, voice going ghost quiet in the hospital room, falling under the shuffling rustle of feathers outside and the transfer of voices in the hallway. He doesn’t even know if Alex remembers that bit. He swallows, trembling a little.

“So I don’t know… what happened,” he reiterates, lamely, fighting off the tears as they threaten to spill. He takes a deep breath, forces himself to focus, recenter. “I just know that when we woke up on the sand, you started bleeding and. I brought you here.” He didn’t want applause or approval or affection or pride for doing the right thing, the thing he knew he had to do. He was just going through the motions of not letting someone he loved die. It was literally the bare minimum.

He was so mad at himself.

“Yeah, Kaida was there. A lot of people were.” He forces himself to remember, eyes squeezing shut tight enough to hurt. “Um, Captain Wledig was there. Ms. Livy, from HBS. We got separated from most of them, though.” A shaky breath rumbles through him, threatening to tear him apart. “Yeah, the-- the stupid trains. The second terminal. Someone got the answer wrong so on top of there being the trains there were two angry legendaries attacking us.”

Alex’s hand finds his and Memo has to stop himself from jerking back, because he feels, physically, revolting. For how he’d acted. For what he’d said and did. As it is he can’t force himself to squeeze back, another quivering breath escaping him. “Then you jumped in front of the train with your-- with your feather?” His voice curls up in a question.

Silence expands. Then, barely a whisper: “I was so scared, Alex. I thought you were going to die.”

[newclass=.samcam] [/newclass][newclass=.samcam b] color: #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam i] color: #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam u] text-decoration: none;border-bottom: dashed 1px #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam a] text-transform:uppercase!important;font:800 15px Poppins!important; [/newclass]
close tab

played by

Ven

Alex / Lexy
he / him / his
thirty
december 22
Mistralton, Unova
homosexual demiromantic
fortree gym leader
gym leader
חקל דמא
awards
5,045 posts
part of
TAG WITH @alexei
Alexei Ivanov
found you [s, c]
POSTED ON Aug 30, 2022 2:42:50 GMT
Alexei Ivanov Avatar


At the mention of him disappearing into the bright light—

He could only stare.

Because that, at least, he could remember, in morbid detail.

When he mentioned the names of the rest of the Explorers of Sky™, he couldn’t help but wonder—how had they fared during their perilous journey? What had they learned while traversing through…

“The… trains, yeah, I… I remember that,” he nodded quietly. Although, it was strange—he found it extremely off-putting—normally, Memo would be the one to initiate the affection, first but… what was happening? Why wasn’t he…?

“I…I remember…someone got it wrong, yes,” he nodded, the back of his throat feeling like someone had rammed too much cotton down his esophagus. “And then… chaos. Just… chaos. Nobody… nobody was dealing with…the trains, so I thought…why not handle it myself?

He blinked again, mistakenly taking another deep breath and letting out a wince afterward. That shit still fucking hurt.

“Nobody…but us. I remember Zuza helping me aim. How…how is she, by the way?”

Another gently squeezing of his hand within the other’s, a reassurance that he was here, he was physically here and alive, what was wrong with him—what was happening, Memo?

After another beat of silence, he sighed.

“Do you…do you want to know…what happened? After…after the light…took me away?”


close tab

played by

Ceej

Memo
He/him
28
August 26
Spikemuth, Galar Region
Homosexual
Ranger Captain
Elite Ranger
it gets lonely in this gangster's paradise
awards
1,175 posts
part of
TAG WITH @memo
Guillermo Marceliño
found you [s, c]
POSTED ON Aug 30, 2022 2:55:15 GMT
Guillermo Marceliño Avatar
[attr="class","samcam"]

YOU'RE NOT ALONE


tw for emetophobia/vom mention


Guillermo listened as Alex took his own, dark trip down memory lane, recounting recall markers and preparing to fill in the bits that were missing, the obvious gaps and, of course, he would have to confess to what he’d done and said and acted-- which he remembered in exquisitely painful detail.

It was bizarre. It was like he was watching a movie wherein he was the main character but he had no control over his actions but in the same it wasn’t anything like a movie at all. He had been there, watching out his eyes, making his own decisions but--

“Zuza’s fine,” Memo said, trying to smile and utterly failing. “She’s-- she--,” he felt the pulse of Alex’s grip on his hand and do you want to know what happened when I went into the light and Memo has to stand up and-- “Sorry. I’ll be right back.”

He sprints out to the nurses station, demands “Bathroom,” gets pointed in a direction. Careens down the hall, into a stall, doesn’t bother to shut the door behind him before he’s puking his guts out, wracked by chill waves of nausea and he keeps going and going, for every awful thing he said, for when he walked away, for when he watched Zuza get vaporized and his only thoughts were of himself. He went until he was spitting up neon bile and his stomach felt like it was grinding stone again.


This had been threatening to happen since they’d woken up on the beach-- since before then, even.

And he allowed himself one, pained sob, then stood up, rinsed his mouth out, splashed his face with water, and made himself be a fucking adult by walking back to Alex’s room. Along the way, he caught sight of a line of birds perched on a building nearby.

He shut the door behind him, breathing measured, trying not to freak out again. Took his seat once more.

“I am very scared,” he confesses, after a long silence where all he does is breathe, “to know what happened when you sacrificed yourself for everyone. And I am equally as scared to tell you what happened between when you jumped in front of that train and when we woke up.”

[newclass=.samcam] [/newclass][newclass=.samcam b] color: #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam i] color: #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam u] text-decoration: none;border-bottom: dashed 1px #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam a] text-transform:uppercase!important;font:800 15px Poppins!important; [/newclass]
close tab

played by

Ven

Alex / Lexy
he / him / his
thirty
december 22
Mistralton, Unova
homosexual demiromantic
fortree gym leader
gym leader
חקל דמא
awards
5,045 posts
part of
TAG WITH @alexei
Alexei Ivanov
found you [s, c]
POSTED ON Aug 30, 2022 3:24:54 GMT
Alexei Ivanov Avatar


“Where are you—” he breathed out, watching as the other—temporarily bolted from the room, leaving him alone and confused.

What was—what was going on?

He could definitely tell that there was something wrong, but he didn’t know the full extent of what (mistakenly taking another couple deep breaths and wincing in the aftermath) and he waited, waited, waited in silence until the other had returned—

While he’d been left in the room alone, the line of avians perched outside the hospital room window changed—a shiny Toucannon taking the place of one of the other Oricorio as they swapped out.

The ‘building gargoyles’ (which was basically most of his owned half-draconids) were still standing guard atop the roof; every single one trying to get the story out of Gabriel the Salamence as well.

Back when the other man had returned, he turned to face him again.

“Which…do you want to talk about first? Mine, or…or yours?”

He couldn’t exactly turn his entire body to face the other man, so he was stuck looking over at him; his left hand chasing the other for some semblance of comfort, of—of stability because shit, shit, shit, he was going to need that stability when he delved into what had happened in the bright nothingness.


close tab

played by

Ceej

Memo
He/him
28
August 26
Spikemuth, Galar Region
Homosexual
Ranger Captain
Elite Ranger
it gets lonely in this gangster's paradise
awards
1,175 posts
part of
TAG WITH @memo
Guillermo Marceliño
found you [s, c]
POSTED ON Aug 30, 2022 3:34:44 GMT
Guillermo Marceliño Avatar
[attr="class","samcam"]


He’s still for a long time before he reaches out and takes Alex’s hand in both of his, thumbs rubbing comforting circles over his knuckles, the back of his hand; the motion soothes him, the touch grounds him. This isn’t about him, he reminds himself, this is about being there for Alex.

All your emotions back and you’re still a selfish prick.

“When you-- derailed the train,” Memo says on an exhale, voice hollow and raspy, “I think a piece of it, of--of shrapnel, dislodged and. And hit you.” He swallowed, thumbs still working, circling, pressing; he shifted so the angle wasn’t so severe on Alex’s forearm, wrist. “Because shortly after, we reset. We all went back to start and you-- you seemed fine but you… didn’t remember who you were. Who anyone was. Who I was. ”

And that had hurt. A lot. Memo had gone through the terrible whiplash of seeing Alex jump in front of a speeding fucking train, then appear totally fine, only to look at him with vacant eyes and ask him who he was. So bittersweet. It made bile rise in his throat.

“I stepped away for a second for-- for some air, because… god, it was really hard. To hear. But I found out from Captain Wledig and another lady who was with him that a lot of people had been… altered. Their memories, gone. So I sort of… calmed down, and Kaida helped, too.” A measured exhale.

“Then… then the next scan happened.”


[newclass=.samcam] [/newclass][newclass=.samcam b] color: #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam i] color: #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam u] text-decoration: none;border-bottom: dashed 1px #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam a] text-transform:uppercase!important;font:800 15px Poppins!important; [/newclass]
close tab

played by

Ven

Alex / Lexy
he / him / his
thirty
december 22
Mistralton, Unova
homosexual demiromantic
fortree gym leader
gym leader
חקל דמא
awards
5,045 posts
part of
TAG WITH @alexei
Alexei Ivanov
found you [s, c]
POSTED ON Aug 30, 2022 3:48:42 GMT
Alexei Ivanov Avatar


“The train—I remember, it crashed…it crashed down around everyone, after…after I threw one of the feathers out,” he nodded quietly, feeling the soothing motion on his left hand now.

It was this touch, this grounding presence, that kept him in the present, in the current, the right now—as he hung onto Memo’s part of the story, word for word.

“I… what?” he blinked, silence falling between them. “After the train, I… what…”

He lapsed into silence, closing his eyes and concentrating on trying to pick out those memories from that particular time frame, just after the train had been properly disintegrated and dealt with.

What—what either man didn’t know was the fact that there had been, indeed, a rather large piece of shrapnel that had struck Alexei in the back—because they’d been so distracted, so consumed with checking if they were alright in the aftermath of the wreckage—that it was this piece of shrapnel that had buried beneath his skin and devoured his heart from the inside out, manifesting in the gaping hole that Memo would remember seeing (but Alexei here wouldn’t, at least not until he was prompted to actually recall this) after…

“Were… I last remember… saying, that… I was alright… is that right?” he asked the other, fingers trying to curl around the other man’s hand, to hold them there, to feel the heat of being—of being alive, right here, right now, as the words continued to fly over his head.

Why couldn’t he remember anything that happened after the train?

Why was there—why was there this massive hole in his memory? What was going on?


close tab

played by

Ceej

Memo
He/him
28
August 26
Spikemuth, Galar Region
Homosexual
Ranger Captain
Elite Ranger
it gets lonely in this gangster's paradise
awards
1,175 posts
part of
TAG WITH @memo
Guillermo Marceliño
found you [s, c]
POSTED ON Aug 30, 2022 4:04:02 GMT
Guillermo Marceliño Avatar
[attr="class","samcam"]


“I don’t know… why, exactly,” Memo confessed, squeezing Alex’s hand, “but you had a-- a giant, deleted portion, in your chest. In your heart.” His eyes stung again and he squeezed them shut. “It took all your memories. Of everyone-- yourself included. I think that’s why you can’t remember from that point.”

This was the hard part.

“The next scan took something from everyone, too. From me, it-- it t--.” The world felt like it was collapsing down around him, all the space in space squeezed to the head of a pin; the blood roared in his ears, and if he squeezed his eyes shut and held his breath he could pretend he was anywhere, anytime, anyone else.

“It altered me. It took away my ability to care. My compassion. Kaida lost her-- her sense of-- I don’t know. Being inhibited? Pride or shame? I don’t know her super well so it’s hard to say. You lost your sight. Your eyes.” The black voids in Alex’s skull stared at him from the darkness behind his own eyelids. He teetered, realized he wasn’t breathing, that he was having a full-on panic attack and he didn’t know what to do.

[newclass=.samcam] [/newclass][newclass=.samcam b] color: #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam i] color: #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam u] text-decoration: none;border-bottom: dashed 1px #d49736; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.samcam a] text-transform:uppercase!important;font:800 15px Poppins!important; [/newclass]