mourning

i used to dream in the dark of palisades park

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played by

lou

blue, murk
she/her
twenty-seven
october 29
goldenrod city, johto
grey-ace
lost dog (defector?)
executive
death inspires me like a dog inspires a rabbit.
awards
341 posts
blue murtagh DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @blue
blue murtagh
mourning
POSTED ON Sept 2, 2023 4:24:02 GMT
blue murtagh Avatar
[nospaces]
[attr="class","petalbase"]
[attr="class","star1"]
[attr="class","circleoutline1"]

[attr="class","starimg"]

[attr="class","star2"]

“Shinra,” she repeats dumbly, frustration climbing in her voice. It’s not fair to be upset with Theo for not knowing, and she knows that, but she can’t, she doesn’t know how to—[break][break]
“He’s my—“ But what is he exactly? Blue hardly knows. It was something they’d only brushed the surface of before she was whisked away to life out another life.[break][break]
All she can grasp is that she’s carried a torch for twenty years of unextinguishable flame.[break][break]
“He’s— He’s just important. I can’t go.”[break][break]
Even if the thought of staying here—where the consequences of abandoning post are more glaring, sort of terrifies her.

[break][break]
[break][break]

// post-gg


[attr="class","star3"]
[attr="class","petalpoke"]
[attr="class","rouxcredit"]


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[newclass=.rouxcredit]align:right; color:#AB4646; font-size:10px; text-align:right; padding:10px; [/newclass]
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played by

noodles

beck
he/him
thirty-eight
march 11th
cinnabar
bisexual
human resources
underboss
829 height
829 height
HIDING FROM THE SUN, WAITING FOR THE NIGHT TO COME.
awards
5,786 posts
THEO BECKETT DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @theo
THEO BECKETT
mourning
POSTED ON Sept 6, 2023 9:29:54 GMT
THEO BECKETT Avatar
[attr="class","beck"]
[attr="class","beckmain"]"ah."

what is left unsaid is understood. love, or something akin to it, is what keeps blue tethered.

"don't be silly. no one is important enough to throw your life away for."

he shakes his head.

"we're leaving, blue."
[attr="class","becktag"]
[attr="class","beckpoke"]
[newclass=.beck] font-size: 11px; text-align: justify; [/newclass][newclass=.beckmain] margin: 0 auto; width:330px;background-color:#2b2b2b;padding:45px;text-align:justify;font-size:11.5px;line-height:14px;letter-spacing:.5px;[/newclass][newclass=.becktag] text-align:right;font-weight:bold;margin-bottom: -15px; padding-top: 15px;[/newclass][newclass=.beck b] color: #d5d5d5; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.beck i] color: #d5d5d5; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.beck u] text-decoration: none; font-style: italic; color: #d5d5d5; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; font-weight: bold; [/newclass][newclass=.beck a] text-transform:uppercase!important;font:800 13px Poppins!important; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.beckpoke] width:420px;background-color:#272727;height:30px;background-image:url(https://image.ibb.co/dMFuMc/flower.png);background-repeat:no-repeat;background-position:center right;text-align:center;padding-bottom:15px;margin: 0 auto;margin-top:-10px;[/newclass]
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played by

lou

blue, murk
she/her
twenty-seven
october 29
goldenrod city, johto
grey-ace
lost dog (defector?)
executive
death inspires me like a dog inspires a rabbit.
awards
341 posts
blue murtagh DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @blue
blue murtagh
mourning
POSTED ON Sept 6, 2023 23:50:36 GMT
blue murtagh Avatar
[nospaces]
[attr="class","petalbase"]
[attr="class","star1"]
[attr="class","circleoutline1"]

[attr="class","starimg"]

[attr="class","star2"]

Her brows pinch together. “Why would I be throwing away my life?”[break][break]
She doesn’t get it, she doesn’t understand why he’d think that.[break][break]
“He’s not in Rocket. I don’t get it.”[break][break]
Again, she shakes her head. Frustration bubbles up to the surface, something pleading and desperate welling in her chest.[break][break]
“Why do we have to go away? I won’t. We can’t, Theo.”[break][break]
Beyond Shinra…it feels cowardly, even.[break][break]
And it’s scary, yes. Breaking ties with the organization is terrifying and it provokes an animal fear that wants to swallow her whole. But Blue is no coward.


[break][break]
[break][break]

// post-gg


[attr="class","star3"]
[attr="class","petalpoke"]
[attr="class","rouxcredit"]


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[newclass=.rouxcredit]align:right; color:#AB4646; font-size:10px; text-align:right; padding:10px; [/newclass]
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played by

noodles

beck
he/him
thirty-eight
march 11th
cinnabar
bisexual
human resources
underboss
829 height
829 height
HIDING FROM THE SUN, WAITING FOR THE NIGHT TO COME.
awards
5,786 posts
THEO BECKETT DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @theo
THEO BECKETT
mourning
POSTED ON Sept 13, 2023 6:02:37 GMT
THEO BECKETT Avatar
[attr="class","beck"]
[attr="class","beckmain"]can't or won't? he wonders.

"if we stay in hoenn, we will be hunted down and eventually slaughtered. there is no league we can turn to, no sanctuary nor refuge for people like us."

he speaks bluntly, as always.

"here, it's either imprisonment or death. but we stand a chance to survive if we leave."
[attr="class","becktag"]
[attr="class","beckpoke"]
[newclass=.beck] font-size: 11px; text-align: justify; [/newclass][newclass=.beckmain] margin: 0 auto; width:330px;background-color:#2b2b2b;padding:45px;text-align:justify;font-size:11.5px;line-height:14px;letter-spacing:.5px;[/newclass][newclass=.becktag] text-align:right;font-weight:bold;margin-bottom: -15px; padding-top: 15px;[/newclass][newclass=.beck b] color: #d5d5d5; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.beck i] color: #d5d5d5; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.beck u] text-decoration: none; font-style: italic; color: #d5d5d5; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; font-weight: bold; [/newclass][newclass=.beck a] text-transform:uppercase!important;font:800 13px Poppins!important; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.beckpoke] width:420px;background-color:#272727;height:30px;background-image:url(https://image.ibb.co/dMFuMc/flower.png);background-repeat:no-repeat;background-position:center right;text-align:center;padding-bottom:15px;margin: 0 auto;margin-top:-10px;[/newclass]
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played by

lou

blue, murk
she/her
twenty-seven
october 29
goldenrod city, johto
grey-ace
lost dog (defector?)
executive
death inspires me like a dog inspires a rabbit.
awards
341 posts
blue murtagh DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @blue
blue murtagh
mourning
POSTED ON Sept 17, 2023 3:19:23 GMT
blue murtagh Avatar
[nospaces]
[attr="class","petalbase"]
[attr="class","star1"]
[attr="class","circleoutline1"]

[attr="class","starimg"]

[attr="class","star2"]

She won’t, is the long-short of it.[break][break]
“How do you know, though? What about everyone else we spent the last twenty years with—surely-“ She shakes her head, frustration continuing to build into the heat of maybe anger. Desperation? She isn’t sure.[break][break]
Her frown is sharp as she stares up at him. Shinra aside—[break][break]
“It feels cowardly.”

[break][break]
[break][break]

// post-gg


[attr="class","star3"]
[attr="class","petalpoke"]
[attr="class","rouxcredit"]


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[/newclass]
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[newclass=.rouxcredit]align:right; color:#AB4646; font-size:10px; text-align:right; padding:10px; [/newclass]
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played by

noodles

beck
he/him
thirty-eight
march 11th
cinnabar
bisexual
human resources
underboss
829 height
829 height
HIDING FROM THE SUN, WAITING FOR THE NIGHT TO COME.
awards
5,786 posts
THEO BECKETT DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @theo
THEO BECKETT
mourning
POSTED ON Sept 25, 2023 11:18:06 GMT
THEO BECKETT Avatar
[attr="class","beck"]
[attr="class","beckmain"]cowardly.

even after all this time, there is a first for everything. nothing stops the hurt rising to the surface, how it replaces anger and desperation.

"fine."

maybe he is a coward.

"you stay, then."
[attr="class","becktag"]
[attr="class","beckpoke"]
[newclass=.beck] font-size: 11px; text-align: justify; [/newclass][newclass=.beckmain] margin: 0 auto; width:330px;background-color:#2b2b2b;padding:45px;text-align:justify;font-size:11.5px;line-height:14px;letter-spacing:.5px;[/newclass][newclass=.becktag] text-align:right;font-weight:bold;margin-bottom: -15px; padding-top: 15px;[/newclass][newclass=.beck b] color: #d5d5d5; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.beck i] color: #d5d5d5; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.beck u] text-decoration: none; font-style: italic; color: #d5d5d5; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; font-weight: bold; [/newclass][newclass=.beck a] text-transform:uppercase!important;font:800 13px Poppins!important; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.beckpoke] width:420px;background-color:#272727;height:30px;background-image:url(https://image.ibb.co/dMFuMc/flower.png);background-repeat:no-repeat;background-position:center right;text-align:center;padding-bottom:15px;margin: 0 auto;margin-top:-10px;[/newclass]
close tab

played by

lou

blue, murk
she/her
twenty-seven
october 29
goldenrod city, johto
grey-ace
lost dog (defector?)
executive
death inspires me like a dog inspires a rabbit.
awards
341 posts
blue murtagh DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @blue
blue murtagh
mourning
POSTED ON Oct 17, 2023 13:11:55 GMT
blue murtagh Avatar
[nospaces]
[attr="class","petalbase"]
[attr="class","star1"]
[attr="class","circleoutline1"]

[attr="class","starimg"]

[attr="class","star2"]

She realizes that she misspoke almost immediately.[break][break]
“Theo…that’s not what I—“[break][break]
Blue stops short, mouth clamping shut again. She doesn’t think he’s a coward, not really. She never has. The lash of her own temper simmers. It used to feel good, provoking anger or hurt from others.[break][break]
But to see it on his face makes her feel nauseous.[break][break]
“I want you to stay, too.” she swallows hard, voicing having dropped small again. She can want that all she wants, but she can’t control him just as much as he can’t control her.[break][break]
That’s how it works.

[break][break]
[break][break]

// post-gg


[attr="class","star3"]
[attr="class","petalpoke"]
[attr="class","rouxcredit"]


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[/newclass]
[newclass=.star1]border-radius: 10px 10px 0px 0; max-width: 460px; height: 220px; background: url(https://i.imgur.com/zsBjQYG.png), #000; background-blend-mode: screen; background-attachment: fixed; background-size: cover; display: flex; justify-content: center; align-items: center;[/newclass]
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[newclass=.rouxcredit]align:right; color:#AB4646; font-size:10px; text-align:right; padding:10px; [/newclass]
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played by

noodles

beck
he/him
thirty-eight
march 11th
cinnabar
bisexual
human resources
underboss
829 height
829 height
HIDING FROM THE SUN, WAITING FOR THE NIGHT TO COME.
awards
5,786 posts
THEO BECKETT DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @theo
THEO BECKETT
mourning
POSTED ON Oct 18, 2023 10:44:21 GMT
THEO BECKETT Avatar
[attr="class","beck"]
[attr="class","beckmain"]"i'll die if i stay."

her concern is dismissed as easily as she dismisses him.

"it's fine, blue. go to shinra. you don't have to concern yourself over me anymore."
[attr="class","becktag"]
[attr="class","beckpoke"]
[newclass=.beck] font-size: 11px; text-align: justify; [/newclass][newclass=.beckmain] margin: 0 auto; width:330px;background-color:#2b2b2b;padding:45px;text-align:justify;font-size:11.5px;line-height:14px;letter-spacing:.5px;[/newclass][newclass=.becktag] text-align:right;font-weight:bold;margin-bottom: -15px; padding-top: 15px;[/newclass][newclass=.beck b] color: #d5d5d5; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.beck i] color: #d5d5d5; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.beck u] text-decoration: none; font-style: italic; color: #d5d5d5; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: .5px; font-weight: bold; [/newclass][newclass=.beck a] text-transform:uppercase!important;font:800 13px Poppins!important; letter-spacing: .5px; [/newclass][newclass=.beckpoke] width:420px;background-color:#272727;height:30px;background-image:url(https://image.ibb.co/dMFuMc/flower.png);background-repeat:no-repeat;background-position:center right;text-align:center;padding-bottom:15px;margin: 0 auto;margin-top:-10px;[/newclass]
close tab

played by

lou

blue, murk
she/her
twenty-seven
october 29
goldenrod city, johto
grey-ace
lost dog (defector?)
executive
death inspires me like a dog inspires a rabbit.
awards
341 posts
blue murtagh DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @blue
blue murtagh
mourning
POSTED ON Oct 18, 2023 15:18:45 GMT
blue murtagh Avatar
[nospaces]
[attr="class","petalbase"]
[attr="class","star1"]
[attr="class","circleoutline1"]

[attr="class","starimg"]

[attr="class","star2"]

“You don’t know that for sure, though!” she argues, frantic pitch climbing in her voice, “we can’t be the only ones that remember—there must be others. Who we were with, they must be able to help. They wouldn’t—“[break][break]
But she doesn’t know that for sure, does she?[break][break]
Theo cuts her off, though, and it cuts her down. Sharp and decisive. [break][break]
She thought it would be cold and cruel, but it’s the sort of hurt that burns.[break][break]
Her teeth sink into her bottom lip until it hurts. And it grounds her. “Fine!” she barks out, trying to will away the wobble that wants to creep into her voice as she whirls on her heels to go.[break][break]
The hurt still burns. Hollowing and raw.
[break][break]
[break][break]

// post-gg


[attr="class","star3"]
[attr="class","petalpoke"]
[attr="class","rouxcredit"]


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[newclass=.petalbase]max-width: 450px; height: auto;border: 1px solid #1a1a1a; border-radius: 10px; overflow: hidden; background: #252525;
[/newclass]
[newclass=.star1]border-radius: 10px 10px 0px 0; max-width: 460px; height: 220px; background: url(https://i.imgur.com/zsBjQYG.png), #000; background-blend-mode: screen; background-attachment: fixed; background-size: cover; display: flex; justify-content: center; align-items: center;[/newclass]
[newclass=.starimg]width: 100px; height: 100px; position: relative; border-radius: 100%; object-fit: cover;[/newclass]
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[newclass=.petalpoke]text-align: center; margin: 0 auto; [/newclass]
[newclass=.petalpoke img]margin-top:0px; [/newclass]
[newclass=.circleoutline1]border-radius: 100%; width: 120px; height: 120px; background: var(--accent); opacity: 0.3; position: absolute; [/newclass]
[newclass=.star2 b]font-weight: bold; color:var(--accent);[/newclass]
[newclass=.star2 i]text-decoration:italic; color:var(--accent);[/newclass]
[newclass=.star3] border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 0; max-width: 460px; height: 50px; background: url(https://i.imgur.com/zsBjQYG.png), #000; background-blend-mode: screen; background-attachment: fixed; background-size: cover; display: flex; text-align:center;[/newclass]
[newclass=.rouxcredit]align:right; color:#AB4646; font-size:10px; text-align:right; padding:10px; [/newclass]
close tab

played by

noodles

beck
he/him
thirty-eight
march 11th
cinnabar
bisexual
human resources
underboss
829 height
829 height
HIDING FROM THE SUN, WAITING FOR THE NIGHT TO COME.
awards
5,786 posts
THEO BECKETT DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @theo
THEO BECKETT
mourning
POSTED ON Oct 19, 2023 3:48:43 GMT
THEO BECKETT Avatar
[attr="class","beck"]
[attr="class","beckmain"]with the hurt still burning and suffocating, he makes no attempts to stop her. he listens to the receding sounds of footsteps and the eventual slam of the door.

it's better this way, he reasons.
[attr="class","becktag"]
[attr="class","beckpoke"]
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the shadow mod
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mod
googoo gaga
spiral is my big poppa pump (positive)
600 foot tall baby height
600 foot tall baby height
sleeping in mod reqs
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TAG WITH @mod
spiral and shiv's baby
mourning
POSTED ON Oct 20, 2023 23:18:01 GMT
spiral and shiv's baby Avatar
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[attr="class","omacceptedtop"]MISSION COMPLETE!

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[attr="class","omacceptedlinks1"]TAGS:
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Hogwarts AU
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Celestial Guardians, AU Sailor Moon RP
EO GENESIS
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