you aren't special here. avatarship can be given and taken at the administrator's whim. ho-oh's code can be rewritten and you would be back to the way you were before you have met him.
as the administrator, you have decided to do it.
you realize that it doesn't work. you've been alone the moment you existed in this space. there is no legend who passed the baton to your hand to continue their story, but you remember them in your head vividly.
as administrator, you have decided to recreate them.
tapu koko. he was the first to take notice of your abilities. although he said no, the brief moment with him gives you a taste of power you could have had. defensive barriers of electricity would fit your style in the battlefield, and electric terrain would have helped the pokemon you use the most, manectric.
had you gone with him, perhaps you'd feel more in your element. they were simple abilities compared to the complicated ones that manifest with each new avatar, but they fit you. all troubles associated with being avatar would have been negligible, as adaptable as you are. you could have retained who you really are.
in the end, it was cowardice that pushed the opportunity away.
entei. he was the one who scouted you in favor of your current patron, perhaps after he learned about the refusal of tapu koko. by some cruel twist of events, a search for an entirely different thing circled back to him, or rather, the deity he serves. you believed he could have had his own piece in the board, but you have surpassed his criteria so much that he offered you to ho-oh instead.
had he took it instead, perhaps you wouldn't feel lost. he was your guardian, even if it had been one out of obligation. loyalty has always been one of your favorite traits. that's why you dogs have always been your thing. maybe your connection with someone like entei would incite you to use your status as an avatar and allow you to flourish better.
you have potential. unfortunately, it doesn't equate to anything without an acting force.
terrakion. he's a knight in most popular stereotype you can think of. you didn't have to accept him, but you did. what were you thinking when it happened? nothing. you have literally nothing to gain, perhaps besides an ease of mind after the incident with tapu koko. have you thought that maybe it would be better if he went to someone else? you did, and it eats you alive every time you see him.
had you not felt bad about yourself and bonded better instead, perhaps he could have helped you become the hero everyone sees you as. the champion of hoenn befits terrakion's virtue of being the protector of the weak. you aren't righteous, but you don't need to be. terrakion has always been the type to help out if needed.
you are destined for greatness. temperance has been your downfall.
solgaleo. you had him since he was a cosmog. you never knew of its identity until it has imprinted itself on you. if you really had no intention of being part of hoenn's history, he would have been your ticket. even if you did, he still would have been your best option. instead, you decided to play it safe, and you are now suffering the worst of both possibilities.
had you been willing to take risks, perhaps the universe wouldn't be as messed up as it is now. you could have either lived your life as a civilian or be the trump card against the threat of the darkest day. there was a reason solgaleo first appeared on hoenn's shores, and its mission could have not ended had someone just took the shot and continued their legacy.
unfortunately, you don't take chances and darkness threatens to take hold.
ho-oh. the one legend who never showed up in the assignment of their own avatar. legends say he values purity of heart over everything. you wonder if that was the reason he never attempted to dictate his avatar to a direction he wants. it is because of him, however, that you start to wonder if you actually are a hero, or if he rewrote your code with other qualities befitting his ideals upon your rebirth.
for you, he was the worst fit. he bestowed upon you a great power, but you don't have any ambition to make use of it. although you think of scenarios where it would better suit another person you know, you always hate the idea of it. you live in the paradox of hating the situation you are put into, and at the same time, excited by the confidence it gives that pushes you to do your own thing without fear.
are you really its avatar when you don't even acknowledge your worth?
in an alternate timeline, you start to wonder who would have been the perfect fit.
darkrai. the avatar of the kyle of sea hoenn. everyone else had their corresponding legend fit their own personality back then, but it is you that finds one that doesn't have a direct mirror to your current patron. you have been wondering why, but tonight was the night you got your answer.
as administrator, your title, alone, gives you the reasoning you need.
you remember your first encounter with darkrai. everyone was clueless, but you faced the challenge head on and without fear. you lost your main pokemon early, returning to you not as an ally, but as an adversary. you have the back against the wall the entire time, but you reveled in the nightmare. you were in your element.
you start to think of dr. holo. you were interested in her research despite not being in the scientific field. at that time, you convinced yourself you were just concerned about the public's own concerns. you did not have to be the one to talk to her, however, but you decided to volunteer yourself. curiosity was a accurate excuse, but there is always an underlying reasoning behind them.
you wonder why. was it because the people you surround yourself with always had the biggest aspirations? or was it because the nature of your hobby feeds itself to boundless possibilities of imagination and that's what you characterize yourself with? regardless, you know for yourself that you don't need an answer.
you recall the place you exist. you have heard people call it the dream world, but you understand the true nature behind it. nevertheless, you are its lord. you have the commands to twist the world to your whims. perhaps ho-oh's lingering sentiments is the reason it is the way it is. nevertheless, one thing is clear.
as administrator, you are worthy.
darkrai has chosen kyle.copy, the obfuscator, as the ruler of this dimension.
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avatarship
