[attr="class","freiwantbot"]
[break]
[break][break]
mommy and daddy loved you a lot, growing up. [break][break]
and you loved them, too. your childhood is of a rich kid who knows nothing of the strife of growing up, naive to the inner workings of society, living in blissful ignorance. mommy and daddy liked to spoil you a lot, so you never really learned the value of money. maybe it's because of this, you were so easy to take advantage of in school. maybe it's because of this, kids would become friends with you because you were so rich.
"you should be nice to mielle" they'd say,
"she'll give you anything if you ask for it". you thought you were making friends, they thought you were their wallet.
but you liked the lie.
they'd worry about you, your parents. they were always worried that some day, you would be tricked by some terrible, horrible person. they thought that you would be snatched away from their arms, and their worries are warranted. they're reasonable, and they wonder if they weren't strict enough on you, who had such a sunny disposition (
and that's what stopped them; because who would want to shatter the cloudless lens of a girl in love with the world?). you're far from neglected, receiving all the love in the world. [break][break]
shielded from all the pain in the world. [break][break]
in high school, you fell in love for the first time. it's your senior year, and he's just a little bit rough around the edges, but you're persistent because you're blinded by the thought
"maybe i can change him". you're the victim to the fantasy of a young girl, and you can see it in hindsight. clarity just hits a bit too late. [break][break]
your parents don't approve of him. he hangs around the wrong crowds, you two aren't compatible. you're stressing out your mother and your father after you tell them you've dated for a year, and they're even more upset when you tell them you want to live and support him. [break][break]
you three get into a really bad fight. you've never seen dad so angry before. [break]
you've never felt the sting of a slap to your cheek before. [break][break]
of course, it's in the heat of the moment, and he immediately apologizes (
but it's your fault, because you've made him so frustrated. he doesn't voice this, but maybe you've realized this truth in the back of your mind). the result? you grit your teeth and smile, telling your parents, calming, that you're going to move out. your father is held back by your crying mother, as he curses you and disowns you for your naivety.[break][break]
you suggested leaving, but it doesn't make the words hurt any less.
being told "i don't have such a stupid daughter", even if it's in the heat of the moment, does something to sting.
you're still naive in your twenties, staying with a man who gradually loses interest in you. sadly, you're optimistic, thinking that things will get better. after all, you've supported him so much, so surely things will be okay. [break][break]
there comes a night where the rose-tinted lens are cracked, unfortunately. [break][break]
it's a night where you're grabbed by a few people, with your boyfriend unable to look you in the eye. he doesn't say anything, but he thanks the people in black profusely. you're half awake and learn that you've been sold to rocket to save a man from his debts (
because for the cheap price of your life, he can live freely). [break][break]
you don't like being a criminal; it's too cruel to the pokemon and the people you hurt. you always try to find a way to help the people you harm, and you realize it's for your own comfort. when have you gotten so selfish? ah, no, you were always so selfish. that's how you ended up here, in the first place. [break][break]
when rocket disbands, you decide to leave and work with beekeeping (it's a hobby you picked up during your time on your own, but it doesn't make much). at least, it doesn't make as much as rocket let you make. at this point, you're still optimistic. what shatters the optimism and spits in the face of it is when you return to your previous partner, a changed man holding another woman in his arms. he doesn't see you, and you're glad he does. [break][break]
he didn't have to see how you've shed the tears as you returned to your work, and it solidifies your decision.[break][break]
you don't like going back to crime, but if you think of it in another way, you can swallow your morality - long enough for you to perform misdeeds. so you return to rocket, loyal to the people you affectionately call your new "family".
[break][break][break][break]
[break][break][break][break][break]
