pulse [c]

i used to dream in the dark of palisades park

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played by

crow

blue
he/him
twenty five
february 24
mauville
samsexual
addict
grunt
let us live, since we must die
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773 posts
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TAG WITH @knox
knox prescott
pulse [c]
POSTED ON Sept 10, 2021 18:33:52 GMT
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he used to spritz on some cologne, back when he really gave a fuck. back when he was just trying to put some pheromones out there at a party, make himself stand out among a throng of bodies. it wasn't really a conscious decision, and it's still not one he recognizes now - he hasn't used cologne or spray or anything since meeting sam.

he decided then that he won't again, because sam likes him as he is and anything else would probably bother him.

the hoodie he's currently wearing is his favorite. it's certainly well-loved, with its faded blue color, the holes near the cuffs, the slightly frayed strings. the rest of his clothes, with some of their rips and tears, were bought that way, and most were flung aside when something shinier caught his eyes. but this is history. this is nostalgia. this is one of the only comforts he has.

there's a coffee in front of his place setting, mixed with cream. it's too late to tell him, isn't it? because sam enjoys making his coffee and knox likes that he enjoys it. that it makes him happy to do this dumb, little thing for him. so he sips and he smiles and he says, "thanks, hon."

and no, that's not quite right, either.

he cuts into some of the pancakes, raises the forkful to his lips, then pauses, says, "so that's why you've been so happy to share your clothes with me. using me for my stink. how shameful of you." 
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played by

wizz

the ferryman
he/him
twenty-eight
october fourteenth
lavender town, kanto
knoxsexual
team rocket
executive
alone with all my illusions
awards
1,306 posts
part of
TAG WITH @sam
samuel carter
pulse [c]
POSTED ON Sept 10, 2021 19:16:24 GMT
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the nickname had sam's face immediately doing a :cringeharold: and he hadn't even realized he was doing it. it just happened, had him shaking his head lightly, and then he smiled with the cringe as knox continued on, hopefully that nickname wouldn't stick.

"i don't think you stink, and i'm not using you at all--"

then, like a ton of bricks, it hits sam. knox was joking. he digresses, shaking his head.

"sorry, that was a joke, ignore me. um..." he fidgets awkwardly, thinking. how does one respond to something like that? usually sass and sarcasm. "yes, shamelessly using you for your stink."

the sarcasm's so dry knox could snuff it.

then, pleased he might have done it right, he takes a sip of his coffee. he hums into it, recalling the nickname 'hon.'

"my mother calls me hon sometimes, please refrain. i liked babe, though." he doesn't think anything of it, just voicing his opinion. "do you prefer being called anything other than knox?"
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played by

crow

blue
he/him
twenty five
february 24
mauville
samsexual
addict
grunt
let us live, since we must die
awards
773 posts
part of
TAG WITH @knox
knox prescott
pulse [c]
POSTED ON Sept 10, 2021 19:30:15 GMT
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knox lets him work through it. he holds a hand over his mouth, but it's just a more dramatic way to (not) cover up his laughter. sam looks so pleased with himself that it only makes it better. he shakes his head, keeps chuckling, wishes he had a camera so he could have captured every single golden expression on sam's face. 

"will refrain," he agrees. "felt like a super Straight husband talking to his wife." he shudders. "no thank you." 

he tilts his head. "oh? okay. still gotta find the one with umph though. y'know, the one for sam." he thinks on it. he hasn't ever really had any nicknames. 'knox' doesn't quite lean to any. and he's been called everything under the sun - babe, slut, bitch, whore, etc. although, he's not too sure he wants those to come out of sam's lips. 

then again. he bites his lips, wills the thoughts away. pancakes first. then clothes. then supplies. THEN THAT. 

he shrugs. "dunno. i like the way you say my name. summer calls me blue, but she's the only one." and it's hers, just as i'll only ever call her red. 
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played by

wizz

the ferryman
he/him
twenty-eight
october fourteenth
lavender town, kanto
knoxsexual
team rocket
executive
alone with all my illusions
awards
1,306 posts
part of
TAG WITH @sam
samuel carter
pulse [c]
POSTED ON Sept 10, 2021 19:42:30 GMT
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"i won't take her name for you." blue and red. reminds him of that one movie, where there's a computer world and the computers feed off of the people's consciousness. sometimes he feels like those computers.

but anyway.

he eats at his oatmeal and sips his coffee. he notices that knox isn't touching the coffee, wonders if he's made it right. but he waits until they've got a break from their meal to ask. the break is when he's finished, not eating much. he doesn't eat much, he snacks a lot though. granola here, fruit there.

"i'll just stick to 'my knox' for now." he gave it some thought, then motions toward the coffee. "did i make it wrong?"
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crow

blue
he/him
twenty five
february 24
mauville
samsexual
addict
grunt
let us live, since we must die
awards
773 posts
part of
TAG WITH @knox
knox prescott
pulse [c]
POSTED ON Sept 11, 2021 3:56:56 GMT
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"good or you'd probably have to fight her for it," he says with a simper. he finally takes a bite of the pancakes and man, they're even better than he remembers. the syrup is golden and has just the slightest taste of honey to it. the cakes themselves are perfectly fluffy; some of the butter dribbles down the sides. 

he is, and he isn't, bewildered that all sam wants is oatmeal. the boy works himself like a dog and barely eats to sustain himself (but knox isn't going to complain about his trim body and tight muscles). 

he's a little bit absorbed in the breakfast, almost oddly so, and he ends up missing what sam says about the coffee. kind of. it takes him a second and then he pieces it together and simpers. 

"no, you didn't make it wrong. you made it like you always do." he sighs. "you were just so excited to make me that coffee after our meeting and i didn't want to say no, but then you kept doing it after that, and really enjoyed it, so i kept letting you enjoy it."

he sets his fork down. "i don't...like coffee. but i like you, so i drank it." 
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played by

wizz

the ferryman
he/him
twenty-eight
october fourteenth
lavender town, kanto
knoxsexual
team rocket
executive
alone with all my illusions
awards
1,306 posts
part of
TAG WITH @sam
samuel carter
pulse [c]
POSTED ON Sept 11, 2021 13:23:27 GMT
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the way knox goes about eating his breakfast doesn't bother sam. he just assumes knox was that hungry.

and then knox explains that he doesn't like coffee and sam feels like a fool. a fool, because he'd been so wrapped up in focusing on not scaring knox away that he had been blind to the small tells. never finishing a cup, insisting on rinsing his own cup, or insisting on making his own cup.

guilt and amusement circle in his expression and he ends up with a small chuckle. it bleeds into a laugh, until finally he can't help but let the laugh take full form.

"you don't like coffee!"

it was the first laugh he'd given, really, true laugh, for a while. there had been so much shit, that the amusement over the coffee was a tension release. he ended up trying to cover his face to hide his laugh, eyes closed.

one of those hold your stomach because it hurts so bad, kind of laughs.

"i've been making you coffee for weeks!"
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crow

blue
he/him
twenty five
february 24
mauville
samsexual
addict
grunt
let us live, since we must die
awards
773 posts
part of
TAG WITH @knox
knox prescott
pulse [c]
POSTED ON Sept 11, 2021 19:53:03 GMT
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"yes. yes, you have," he says and finally allows himself to make a face. "they always say it's an acquired taste, but..." he trails off because sam's shoulders are shaking and at first, he thinks the boy's having another panic attack, but his laughter comes out of him and it's the best godsdamn sound knox has ever heard. 

he lights up like a christmas tree and joins him. and they earn a few weird looks, but that doesn't really matter. sam's laugh is a sing-song and he's in love with it and he wants to hear more, more, more of it. 

he loses interest in the pancakes then, in the rest of the food. he tosses his utensils down and his napkin on top and drinks sam in with that big sideways grin of his. 

"you're beautiful, you know that?" he says. 
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played by

wizz

the ferryman
he/him
twenty-eight
october fourteenth
lavender town, kanto
knoxsexual
team rocket
executive
alone with all my illusions
awards
1,306 posts
part of
TAG WITH @sam
samuel carter
pulse [c]
POSTED ON Sept 13, 2021 14:01:54 GMT
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the laughter seemed to dissolve how annoyingly pensive they'd allowed each other to become over the evening before. rightly pensive, so any normal human being would argue. sam hadn't seen the need. it was over and done with, he didn't feel remorse because they were now safe and that bastard would hopefully figure knox wasn't worth the trouble that sam could cause.

that had been the goal, anyways. who knew what would come of it.

knox' words derailed his thoughts, smile remaining as he thought about what was said.

"beautiful?"

words like that were reserved for his gardevoir, not for him. they belonged to the way the peak of mt. pyre could catch the moon. or how a coordinator could show off a pokémon.

but him?

"what makes you say so?"
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played by

crow

blue
he/him
twenty five
february 24
mauville
samsexual
addict
grunt
let us live, since we must die
awards
773 posts
part of
TAG WITH @knox
knox prescott
pulse [c]
POSTED ON Sept 13, 2021 14:58:56 GMT
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knox nods because uh, obviously. the peacock boy is as shallow as they come. if he didn't think sam were beautiful, he wouldn't be here right now. but, of course, and it's a hard pill for him to swallow - it's more than that. it really is his laugh, because he's never felt a pang in his chest when someone else has laughed before. 

he gestures towards sam's whole person. "because you are? simple 's that. what? i can't be smitten with my boyfriend?" 

and then he reaches forward to teasingly tap sam on the nose. 
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played by

wizz

the ferryman
he/him
twenty-eight
october fourteenth
lavender town, kanto
knoxsexual
team rocket
executive
alone with all my illusions
awards
1,306 posts
part of
TAG WITH @sam
samuel carter
pulse [c]
POSTED ON Sept 13, 2021 15:08:24 GMT
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"uh..."

boyfriend?

the label loops around in sam's head for what felt like days. reality, maybe half a second. he furrowed his brows, smile still there. perplexed and excited, he just takes the title gently and tucks it away into the recesses of his mind. perhaps he can hang onto it in a place it can never be taken from him.

"i'm not often described as beautiful. smitten as you may be, beautiful is more a word i would use to describe scenery... take you for example," he was about to attempt and repay the compliment. "your allure, for me, is your presence. your scent, your mannerisms, how you hold yourself. captivating, or breath taking, that's the word i would use."

but beautiful? no, that word simply wasn't enough and he felt it was too much to describe himself.
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played by

crow

blue
he/him
twenty five
february 24
mauville
samsexual
addict
grunt
let us live, since we must die
awards
773 posts
part of
TAG WITH @knox
knox prescott
pulse [c]
POSTED ON Sept 13, 2021 15:31:45 GMT
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"is that why you got that look on your face when i gave you this?" he says and tugs at the hoodie he's wearing. he thought he'd heard every compliment under the sun, but sam's are made in earnest and it makes knox feel things. things that make him want to feel more things. things that are abstract, but are pulsing on his skin and in his eyes and in his heartbeat. 

and oh, no, that's the flush on his cheeks. pink pools onto his cheeks and he can feel the heat on his ears. he makes a face and then yanks his hood up to shadow himself. 

"how are you able to do this to me?" he complains and covers the rest of his face with his hand. and then, to move on from the subject and try to get every ounce of blood in his body to go back where it belongs instead of gathering at his face, he says, "are you going to eat more? i thought you were starving."
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played by

wizz

the ferryman
he/him
twenty-eight
october fourteenth
lavender town, kanto
knoxsexual
team rocket
executive
alone with all my illusions
awards
1,306 posts
part of
TAG WITH @sam
samuel carter
pulse [c]
POSTED ON Sept 13, 2021 15:38:58 GMT
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seeing knox so embarrassed has sam wondering if he's honestly this bashful, if he's masochistic since he's such a narcissist to himself most of the time, or if sam had missed something.

but wait. what if nobody honestly complimented knox... ever? that sounded false. not just inaccurate either, but like a sleight against the universe. knox was gorgeous. he was easy on the eyes and he had a charm and allure to him that raptured sam's entire being in just one evening.

but then the subject is changed, focus on their food, and sam glances down at his oatmeal.

"i'm always starving. i have a very small stomach. i snack a lot. for now, i'm satisfied." then he meets knox' gaze with a soft smile. "we can pay at the counter," he motioned as he picked up the ticket. "it's clothes shopping next, isn't it?"
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played by

crow

blue
he/him
twenty five
february 24
mauville
samsexual
addict
grunt
let us live, since we must die
awards
773 posts
part of
TAG WITH @knox
knox prescott
pulse [c]
POSTED ON Sept 13, 2021 18:43:37 GMT
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well, at least they can relate there, granted knox doesn't get much enjoyment out of snacking. usually ruins the buzz. in that regard, he doesn't push sam to eat more, nor does he force himself. with half of their food left unfinished, he gets up from the table and offers a hand to sam. 

"we can pay," he says with a snort. no, ricky and that dead asshole can pay. which reminds him - he draws his phone out and sends a quick text to him, of which includes an apology for leaving the truck stranded. after texting approximate coordinates for where they'd left it, he pockets his phone again and pays with a thin sliver of newly pressed bills. 

fortree isn't the easiest town to maneuver in, but eventually he finds a boutique with some clothes to his liking. 

he starts thumbing through the clothes and then glances over at sam. "do you only ever wear sweats? i'm not complaining. just curious."
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played by

wizz

the ferryman
he/him
twenty-eight
october fourteenth
lavender town, kanto
knoxsexual
team rocket
executive
alone with all my illusions
awards
1,306 posts
part of
TAG WITH @sam
samuel carter
pulse [c]
POSTED ON Sept 13, 2021 19:01:58 GMT
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"i wore parachute pants on our first date."

were those considered sweats? sam didn't know, and neither do i.

sam watched knox thumb through clothes. he hadn't minded knox helping pay, because he'd insisted. either way, sam didn't thumb through the clothes because he didn't plan on buying anything. but he noticed knox didn't look particularly happy... so he pulled out a small 'juniors' tank top crop top and held it over his own stoic and unexpressive frame.

"knox," he waited for eye contact before finishing with, "does this make me look fat?"

maybe that would lighten the mood.
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played by

crow

blue
he/him
twenty five
february 24
mauville
samsexual
addict
grunt
let us live, since we must die
awards
773 posts
part of
TAG WITH @knox
knox prescott
pulse [c]
POSTED ON Sept 13, 2021 19:14:02 GMT
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"i stand corrected," he says and rolls his eyes. he'd owned a couple pairs himself, but sam seems to revere them. which, honestly, he can't really blame him for. they're comfy as fuck and somehow socially acceptable to wear outside. 

knox's fingers flit quickly through the sizes of a few of the trousers. he grabs a couple of different fits because he knows he's gained, and will lose, some of the width around his hips. sam's regular food and the bedrest had helped him kick some of his naughtier habits to the curb, but he's been through this motion before. 

clothes are just annoying. 

he grabs a few basic tees, some v-necks, a couple of patterned sleeved shirts, the pants, and ends up finding a cute baggy hoodie. he tosses all of that together and throws it up on the counter for check-out, requesting only that the hoodie's tags be taken off. 

"i'll just return what doesn't fit," he says after paying. then he shrugs off the hoodie he's wearing and tosses it at sam, replacing it with the new one. 

"happy birthday," he says and runs a finger through his hair. "wait, when is your birthday?"
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