[attr="id","moontop"]

[attr="id","moonpost1"]

Shinra hated this place.
[break][break]
The ugly underbelly of the world, where all of the filth in it seemed to convalesce. Being down here, it only exposed him. It reminded him of a past he'd do better to forget and probably would benefit from too. It reminded him that down here, they were all the same. The unprocessed meat, the same collection of dirty particles. They breathed the same, didn't they? In places like this, potential died.
[break][break]
Onna was good for these places, freezing the air where the froslass hovered. It kept others at bay, but Shinra wasn't bothered by the cold. He was there for a reason, of course, but also not. This wasn't protocol and it wasn't even personal habit. He obsessed sometimes, of course, that was part of the job and he was very invested in his job (to such an extent it was likely unhealthy). Yet, regardless of his subject, it was getting harder and harder to justify this with work.
[break][break]
Murk, they called her, but he knew her by a different name. Yet right then, she burned differently, with a vengeance. Kinetic, that was the word he'd use for blue murtagh in a fight. As small as she was, she fought with the ferocity that belittled the heftier among her. Admittedly, he hadn't come there to admire the slight woman's fighting prowess, but it ended up being the subject of his fascination all the same.
[break][break]
Shinra told himself he was not a violent man, but a calculated one. Violence didn't mean anything to him, and yet... it was moments like this that he missed the old days back in Kanto, when he could do whatever he wanted to make someone talk. He'd been almost too good then. Now, often times, his job felt far less satisfying. You're not a hero— no, he wasn't. That wasn't the point, but some people joined his profession because they craved heroics.
[break][break]
He also wasn't a gambler, but he still bet all the same. She better win though. They didn't exactly pay him a lot in Interpol.

[attr="class","moonbottom"]

[attr="id","moontop"]

[attr="id","moonpost"]This fight was hers. She could feel it under her skin like an energy.[break][break]

She twisted, curving away from a quick jab, and that’s when she caught it, caught him— the stark, silvery white hair and sharp, icy blue in his eyes. Cold, collected interest. Blue froze, muscles and joints locking up like a startled deerling caught in the headlights of a car as cold dread eased through her system, cutting through the heat of her adrenaline.[break][break]

Caught. He found her.[break][break]

All of this in the span of a few seconds. Her voice is a hiss, though she wouldn’t be heard over the roar of the crowd, even with her ruby eyes locked in his. “Shi—“ Whether she meant to curse or say his name was anyone’s guess because time caught up and the second jab of her opponent’s quick 1-2 went unblocked.[break][break]

It wasn’t ever meant to be a clean find, so the hit caught her in the temple and static rang between her ears and there was a burst of blood in her mouth from biting her tongue. Blue reeled, staggering back from the punch before springing forward again.[break][break]

How dare he find her here. Woozy dizzy steps, she launched her full body weight at her opponent until they toppled. And then she was on them, pummeling them with quick hits, blood spray pluming up to paint her face.[break][break]

How[break][break]

Dare[break][break]

He.[break][break]

Annoyed, she ignored the mingled taunts and cheers awarded her for her victory, and slipped under the ropes of the ring to hop down and walk away. She didn’t know if he’d follow her, but Blue expected him to for some reason. The jig was up, after all.[break][break]

[attr="class","moonbottom"]

[attr="id","moontop"]

[attr="id","moonpost1"]

Her eyes connected with his. Violent red, flashing through the crowd to fix on him. Like some kind of primal animal in the wild. A latent instinct in him warned of something dangerous and yet all it managed to do was intrigue him even more. There was nothing inherently special about her, he told himself, he'd seen snakes before and he'd seen wild predators. He'd seen the worst sort of men and plucked through the confines of their mind with relative ease. Yet, for some reason, she intrigued him.
[break][break]
As soon as she looked at him, her focus on the fight was lost. A split second, and then she was getting nailed by a nasty hook. He cringed at the sight, teeth gritting on the realization he was maybe a little at fault for that. No point in saying sorry though, she really should have been focusing, shouldn't she?
[break][break]
Turned out there was far more to her than met the eye. As if he hadn't expected as much, considering the volatility of their first meeting. Despite the voice in his head to give berth to the girl with the violent eyes, he couldn't help but follow after her. Only... then he lost her. "Shit," He muttered, steering himself through the crowd in the direction he'd last seen her head.
[break][break]
Well that was disappointing, wasn't it?

[attr="class","moonbottom"]

[attr="id","moontop"]

[attr="id","moonpost"]Was it nice to see her take a hard hit? Blue couldn’t fathom why Shinra had come here. Why he’d sought her out in a hidey hole of her own making. Even more so why she was so hellbent on finding out the why of it when she should’ve just ducked him and gotten out of there while she had the chance.[break][break]

She caught him following, and quickly deviated her path. Hid herself in the fringes of the crowd until she could see him emerge, looking around. It was only then that she revealed herself, hand reaching up to yank him down by the front of his shirt. There was still blood spattered across her face that she hadn’t bothered to wipe away yet.[break][break]

“What do you think you’re doing here?” she hissed, not caring if the fingers balled in his sullied it, or made his stance awkward or uncomfortable. “You’ve figured out my little secret.” Sort of. “Happy? Pleased? There you go.”[break][break]

Blue continued to glare at him for a moment longer before releasing his shirt roughly. Always careful not to make actual contact. “Dunno what you want anyway.” Not from this scummy place, not from her.
[break][break]

[attr="class","moonbottom"]

[attr="id","moontop"]

[attr="id","moonpost1"]

How was it that someone so tiny could also be so formidable? That was one of many questions that he had, among a slew of others. He didn't really like opened questions. Like little spaces of unsatisfied air that hadn't yet been filled up. It felt like inadequacy, and he couldn't have that.
[break][break]
She appeared out of nowhere and suddenly he was being yanked down to meet her eyes. The difference was rather back-breaking, to say the least. Very uncomfortable. Yet what alarmed him more what the tightening feeling of fingers on his collar, the grubby mixture of dirt and blood that stained her fingers, hid under her nails. He felt a convulsion crash down his body, but he didn't yet pull away. It was very likely she wouldn't allow him to.
[break][break]
There was blood on her face — her own or someone else's, there was no way of knowing for certain. Likely, it wouldn't matter either way. For a moment, he felt far away. In a white room, a body hanging from the steel bolts in the ceiling. He pulled back a little, but it wasn't permitted and his mind returned back to the filth of the underworld. "I was following you." He said, plainly. Likely only echoing her own sentiments. "I was curious." Another non-lie. There really was no point in lying after being found out.
[break][break]
"I want to know why you fight." Another simple non-lie. A truth, as many might say.

[attr="class","moonbottom"]

[attr="id","moontop"]

[attr="id","moonpost"]Was he impressed? She didn’t care if he was. Or so she’d claim. She didn’t owe this guy, she hadn’t been asked to coast under the radar with his clearance. That was all him. So if he’d come here, expecting gratitude from Blue, he could kindly take his assumptions and shove them. Still, it felt good to defy expectations, didn’t it? To see him bend under her hand despite her smaller stature. It proved her mettle, in her mind. It proved she was as crass and inconsiderate and prickly as she thought herself to be.[break][break]

“That's a little bold.” Words huffed as she finally released him, brushing her hand on the leg of her athletic pants as if he were the filthy one and not her. “What is there to be curious about? Haven’t I answered enough of your questions?” There was something a little distant in his eyes, just for a moment—which only further added to her frustration. What was the point of tracking her down if he’d only space out on her when caught? And of course he was going to get caught.[break][break]

In a place like this? Shinra Moro stood out like a sore thumb.[break][break]

“Uh, because I want to?” It was a little more complicated than that. Of course it was. She didn’t know what else to do with her hands, with herself. She wasn’t good for much else, apart from this. But she didn’t see what that mattered to him. This obviously wasn’t him doing his work. This was separate. Or else he would have said as much by that point. Regardless, she didn’t see any need to hang around. If he was so bent on finding out more, he could follow.[break][break]

So she swiveled on her heels and went back to what she’d been doing before she’d grabbed him— stalking toward the exit to go stew in her moodiness. Or in simpler terms: take a smoke break.

[break][break]

[attr="class","moonbottom"]

[attr="id","moontop"]

[attr="id","moonpost1"]

Blue released him and he readied himself for the shiver that followed, the threat of contact that so haunted him. And yet... he paused briefly, a touch caught off guard by the absence of revulsion. Maybe it was the looming feeling of grunge that seeped from the seedy walls of this place, she felt like an exception because it was better that than anyone else. Still, she was rather gross, wasn't she?
[break][break]
"For work, yes... I suppose you have." Bit forward, wasn't it? To suggest this wasn't about work, when he'd used that to justify his being there. Everything was supposed to be about work. That was how he operated. He didn't have time for anything else. If this wasn't about work, then what was it really about? When he swallowed, his throat felt raw.
[break][break]
She likely thought he didn't fit here, but little did she know, he didn't fit anywhere. Regardless of where he went, it felt foreign. Maybe he envied her, looking so at home and comfortable in her skin while in the ring, pulverized until she was black and blue. How it might feel to belong in your own skin, that wasn't something he'd ever really know, was it? "But why? How does that benefit you?" She walked away at that point and he followed, feeling very much like one of her poochyena.
[break][break]

[attr="class","moonbottom"]

[attr="id","moontop"]

[attr="id","moonpost"]“What’s that supposed to mean?” She spit the words over her shoulder as she scowled back at him. That made it sound like he’d taken a personal interest in that. No one ever did that. Not unless they wanted something from her. Wanted to mold her, shape her, make her their little pet with sharp teeth.[break][break]

Her tongue ran over her teeth, her gums. The copper tang of blood was heavy on her tongue and so she spat on the pavement outside to rid herself of the taste even just a little bit. She didn’t care what he might think of that. If he followed after her like some moony-eyed pup, that was his problem, not hers. There was a slight tremor in her fingers as she fished out a cigarette and jammed it between her lips before lighting up.[break][break]

The toes of her sneakers edged off the curb just a bit. She could tilt into oncoming traffic if she wanted to. Just like that. The free fall. The lack of control. That was exactly why she’d never do it.[break][break]

She ignored his question. It wasn’t about gaining anything. It was about letting the softer parts of her fade away. She took a long drag of her cigarette, still looking out at the street, and away from him. There was a jarring shift inside of her then, with the realization that he’d continue to follow her about. Instead of benefits—[break][break]

“Do, you, Shitra— do you ever wonder what it would be like if you were invisible. Would anything change?” Smoke curled around her face and lifted into the night sky.[break][break]

“Why shouldn’t I do this? I’m the most expendable person I know.” There’s almost an identifiable ache to her words even as she tries to keep them clipped and defensive. How sad is that?

[break][break]

[attr="class","moonbottom"]

[attr="id","moontop"]

[attr="id","moonpost1"]

What did that mean, exactly? There was nothing but work. That was the basis of their "relationship" after all, he was studying her because it was his job to do so. However, he wasn't there to study her right then and this find would likely never make it into her files. Why? Well... he didn't really have an answer to that yet.
[break][break]
His eye followed her movement, the subtle nihilism in it. How easily it would be for her to end her life just stepping into traffic. How easy it would be for him to allow it, or not. The choice didn't feel powerful, he didn't like feeling impotent either. She was strange, wasn't she? Why did he enjoy that about her?
[break][break]
In equal opportunity, if she willed it, she could choose to kill him. They were in her world now, not his. He could be silenced quite easily and no one would bat an eye over the death of interpol scum. "Who says I'm not?" Once upon a time, he had been. Despite how much he stood out in a crowd, he'd always been quiet both in self and form. No one noticed him before. It was only different now because he noticed her. "In my experience, no. It changes nothing."
[break][break]
Blue bled her emotions in a wild sort of way, with reckless abandon. He envied her for that. How willfully she could just self-destruct with no regrets.
[break][break]
"It doesn't have to be that way though, but you know that. You don't wish to change your misery, you like that about yourself."

[attr="class","moonbottom"]

[attr="id","moontop"]

[attr="id","moonpost"]She couldn’t say that she understood the meaning of this. What did he want with her, if it wasn’t to expose her for having been a plant within the police force? Why seek out her little secrets? She wasn’t sure if she bought a simple desire to know her better. Because who would ever want that?[break][break]

Even a smug fox like Shinra should know better than that. Blue remained on the edge of traffic, toes of her shoes dangling off the curb. She had no desire to actually do so. The want to live not because she’d overcome difficulties, but in spite of those who’d subjected her to them. But even that was a cry for attention, wasn’t it? She was just a pathetic pet, looking for praise in those who would provide it.[break][break]

Weak.[break][break]

No matter how sharp and tough she made herself. She could mold herself into a weapon, but that didn’t mean there weren’t fractures that still existed in her makeup. So stupidly fragile. She lacked the cold impassivity Shinra carried himself with. She was a raw, exposed nerve. So what did he want?[break][break]

His response was what gave her pause. She frowned, glancing back over her shoulder at him. “So you get it.” Either of them could vanish without much notice. The world would still spin, lives wouldn’t be interrupted or put on hold. “Nothing matters. Why shouldn’t I fight?” Though by that logic it didn’t matter whether he was tailing her or not, and still she’d grown angry over it. Why feel so much about something or someone who shouldn’t matter?[break][break]

Stepping back off the curb’s edge, Blue spun on her heels to look over at him. One hand dove deep into her pocket. The other fished loose a cigarette. Walking backward, she eyed him as she barked out a dry laugh. “You think I like how miserable I am? Right, sure.”[break][break]

She’d rather tilt into traffic headfirst than admit that it was less a desire to remain steeped in her misery and more the fact that she didn’t know how to be anything different. And anything different scared her. Deep down, knitted into every fiber of her being Blue was no more than the scared kid she’d always been.
[break][break]

[attr="class","moonbottom"]

[attr="id","moontop"]

[attr="id","moonpost1"]

Every minute he spent there was another minute he could not justify his reasoning. It slipped right through his fingers and yet the time didn't feel wasted. It was odd. Blue was odd. Not so much for the rough-hewn rebellious beast that she was but for the responses she seemed to encourage in him. What was he supposed to do with her? The simplest would be to write up a report that she was both emotionally and ethically compromised. Regardless of her involvement with Rocket, which he couldn't yet determine, he had enough evidence to put her off the force. And yet...
[break][break]
That didn't erase the fact he found her intriguing and that he hadn't reported anything beyond that he needed further observation. He didn't, he could read her like an open book and she made no effort to hide herself. She didn't know anything about being invisible truly. To him, she was radiant and sporadic and loud. Unfortunately, not in a bad way either.
[break][break]
"I dunno, suppose there lies the difference. I wouldn't know the point in fighting, but I think you're addicted to burning out." He shrugged, that didn't mean anything in reality. They both knew it. None of these were new observations.
[break][break]
"I do," He shrugged, "There's a proverb about helping those that don't wish to be helped."
[break][break]
Granted, he didn't seek to be fixed anymore either, but he'd tried in the past to feel something differently. It burned him.
[break][break]
"If you could change, would you?"

[attr="class","moonbottom"]

[attr="id","moontop"]

[attr="id","moonpost"]Blue didn’t understand him. Why he was so keen to understand her or figure her out like she was something worth being understood in the first place. Something raw ached in her throat, in the center of her chest. The ugly desire to be known and seen and accepted that was never granted seeing the light of day.[break][break]

She shoved it back down again.[break][break]

“I think you seem to have a lot of ideas about me and what I do,” she remarked simply, rather than agree and admit that yes, she was addicted to the burn out. The ache that came with fighting to the point of being on the brink, unable to pull back up. She didn’t know what peace was like, but she figured that feeling was the closest she’d ever come to it.[break][break]

A short, dry bark of laughter followed his question. She didn’t look back at him, not at first. Instead, she took a lengthy drag from her cigarette as she continued to watch the traffic. “Who wouldn’t want that chance?” Futile or not.[break][break]

When she finally looked back at him, there might have been a sort of strange sadness in her eyes. Mourning something that would never happen. “But I don’t know who that person would be. She’d probably turn out the same.”[break][break]

Stuck in a circular pattern, making the same choices again and again because she didn’t know any better.[break][break]

She barely knew who she was now.[break][break]

This was getting tiresome. Despite her stubborn resistance, her adrenaline had run down and her muscles began to ache from the lost match. Dropping her cigarette, she stomped it out with the heel of her boot. “M’hungry,” she announced swiftly, a sharp veering away from the daunting subject.[break][break]

Hands shoved in her pockets, she moved further down the street, away from where the matches were being held. Oddly enough, she didn’t try to swat Shinra away. If she hadn’t wanted him to follow, she wouldn’t have proclaimed her desire for a meal. Why was that?

[break][break]

[attr="class","rouxcredit2"]♠