[attr="class","giada"]

[attr="class","giada b"]

[attr="class","giada i”]at the admission, she reels back as if struck. her expression cracks into exposed hurt, layers and walls broken down until there's nothing left but the fragile girl beneath.

"oh, so now i'm worth something?"

enough to try keeping around apparently...

she doesn't know whether she should laugh or cry. half of her wants to do both.

"how am i possibly important to you, then, cian?"

CIAN MAHER

[attr="class","giada"]

[attr="class","giada b"]

[attr="class","giada i”]"you were still important to me before!"

they hadn't necessarily known each other then, but the relationship had still been something she clung to for reasons she doesn't want to acknowledge because she knows, in the end, he had been the only person to stay for as long as he did.

and like clockwork, he had left too when all was said and done.

"you were the only person who actually wanted me around and when you left, i had no one."

even now, she expects that same result to come back to full fruition once more. he doesn't solidify anything about them, only dancing around the concept of honesty with terms like important and coming to care for her. she frowns at the thought.

and softly comes the questions:

"what am i to you, then? an important friend?"

CIAN MAHER

[attr="class","giada"]

[attr="class","giada b"]

[attr="class","giada i”]before him, she had some people. emma, marcel, even abner for a short little while... but they, too, all left in the end just as he did and she stayed behind to exist as she always has: alone.

and despite herself, she had always held out hope that it wouldn't last forever, that something would change and her destiny wouldn't be solitude. has it come to pass, though, or will it end up crumbling down beneath leaving footsteps and his back fading into the distance?

"more than a friend how?"

he doesn't explain in terms she exactly understands. there's no commitment, no definition of anything except a vague concept existing in a realm somewhere above friendship. it's confusing, he's confusing.

"what are you trying to say, cian?"

CIAN MAHER

[attr="class","giada"]

[attr="class","giada b"]

[attr="class","giada i”]throughout his admissions, she stays quiet. whether it's out of fear of saying the wrong thing, of messing it all up, or simple waiting, she doesn't know...

but the surprised blinks come like clockwork. once, twice, thrice, and she'd swear she looked like an owl if she could see herself fully.

"you do?"

since when? has he been harboring this or is it a split-second decision because the other option is her slow leaving.

hesitantly, with a soft voice and shaky hands, she tries to lay out a response.

"i was worried you didn't want that and, like, you just wanted to be friends."

a pause mingles with the rise of a confusing mix between fear and hope and trepidation.

"i would like to be more."

CIAN MAHER

[attr="class","giada"]

[attr="class","giada b"]

[attr="class","giada i”]whatever this is... frankly, she doesn't know.

there's a swirling sensation of some foreign emotion threatening to bubble up to the surface, but each time she shoves it down with a shaky fist. the fear of being wrong, of things becoming bad then terrible then worse, threatens to eat her alive.

"me too."

it's unfamiliar territory, something she couldn't even begin to know how to navigate.

and he takes a step closer, a smile breaking through like sunshine after hours of rain, but she still looks hesitant, afraid.

"are you sure this is what you want?"

she wouldn't blame him if, in the end, it isn't. it wouldn't be the first time. she would survive this too.

CIAN MAHER