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chaotic stupid, i'll get used to feeling useless

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I cannot conceive of a universe

POSTED ON Apr 28, 2024 20:48:58 GMT

she's bobbing in the water and every time she comes up for air, she cannot stop herself from screaming. and it's like that for an eternity, this feeling of drowning and then of not drowning, but when she's not drowning, she's dying. she's on fire and she's dying and she doesn't want to die but she doesn't want to drown either because someone she loves is dying/dead out there.

we're keeping her under because of the shock, they tell nomi. the skin graft was successful, they say. she'll be okay, they promise.

they don't know that under those sterile blankets, smothered by the morphine, she is being chased in circles by her monsters. red fire burns her house down. black fire destroys her nerve endings. blue fire kills her love.

when she wakes up, really wakes up, without a start, hooded eyes take in her surroundings. her pain feels far away. her brain feels sluggish. her arm feels heavy. and where is - ?

"who're you?"
Naomi Sato
☉

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nellethiel

Nomi; The Visionary

She/Her

November 9

Ecruteak, Johto

Bisexual

Prophetess

Head Scientist

without you in it

5'2" / 157 cm height

Curiosity is one of the great secrets of happiness.

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Naomi Sato

POSTED ON Apr 29, 2024 3:36:37 GMT

Elisabeth Fiorelli and howard slayte like this

[nospaces]

[attr="class","nomitest9"]

[attr="class","body"]

Later - much later, when she's cradling Parker in her arms, in their bed, in their house - it won't be her girlfriend's screams that haunt her, won't be the memory of the Councilwoman's vile contempt that shape-shifts her dreams into nightmares. It will be the whispered words of Elisabeth Fiorelli, uncharacteristically sincere, that paint the walls of her heart with guilt.[break][break]
"Trust, when given too freely and too blindly, is a temptation precious few can resist abusing."[break][break]
"I grew complacent," she tries to explain to the doctors, over and over, as if that might help them save Parker. "She was right to warn me."[break][break]
Crazed eyes, still ringed in white, beg for their understanding, plead for their judgement, but all they do is lead her down a sterile hallway and tell her to wait.[break][break]
So she waits. And waits. A nurse draws her blood, checks her pulse, hands her a bottle of water. Nomi chokes on the sorrow settling into her bones as she tries once more, feebly, to explain what happened.[break][break]
She's going to be okay, the nurse reassures her, hastily placating, the bags under her eyes nearly as dark as Nomi's. But it doesn't feel okay. It feels anything but okay.[break][break]
Hours (days?) pass, and in the bathroom, she touches shaking fingertips to hair that has been shorn off just below her ears - thinking vaguely it's never been this short - but then realizing that it's also blue. She doesn't yet realize it's the same blue. The color of her shadow.[break][break]
Parker doesn't realize it, either. Doesn't even recognize Nomi.[break][break]
Amnesia is a risk of serious injury, which some logical part of her brain knows, but the question breaks her anyway. Shatters her into a thousand pieces.[break][break]
"It's me," she entreats, as if it's obvious: a commitment to denial. She's going to be okay, they'd said, and there isn't a world where okay means forgotten.[break][break]
"I'm Nomi. Your Nomi."

TAGS – parker jones[break]
NOTES – SOCIAL

[attr="class","pkmn"]

Shiny Unown-K (Kallistatus) | Levitate | Hidden Power, Shadow Sneak | Divine Immanence Z-Move | DARK TERA SHARD

[attr="class","credit"]

✦

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[newclass=".nomitest9 .pkmn img"]margin:-10px -7px 0px -7px;[/newclass]
[newclass=".nomitest9 .credit"]font-size:13px;[/newclass]

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crow

six

she/her

twenty-five

march 21

mauville

gay

debt collector

grunt

5'6 height

chaotic stupid, i'll get used to feeling useless

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I cannot conceive of a universe

POSTED ON Apr 29, 2024 3:55:57 GMT

it's me, the stranger says, as though it's obvious, but saying it so only makes it obvious. saying it with the amount of pain in her eyes - pain you gave to her, because you didn't say it back to her, you idiot. she loves you and you were too chickenshit to say it back and now - a groan wells up in her throat, pressure in the back of her head, but thankfully no blood dribbles down her nose.

her throat should be dry and scratchy. she should feel pain, with how croaky her words are, but it's all so far away.

i'm nomi. your nomi.

all of her nightmares chased her to the brink. all of her nightmares brought her back to the surface. ink had bled all over the grey, brutal in technicolor. names of the dead and damned and long, long gone lay on the tip of her tongue.

you brought them back, would be accusatory.

you made me remember, would be damning.

you made me bleed, would break her.

she smiles a wolfish smile and chapped lips threaten to split.

"'course y'are, cupcake," she croaks and goes to lift her left arm. it's bulky, almost dead to the world. her gaze slides lazily down to it and she blinks groggily a couple of times, registering the thick gauze wrapped around her.

"did we get 'em?" she asks slowly.
Naomi Sato
☉

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played by

nellethiel

Nomi; The Visionary

She/Her

November 9

Ecruteak, Johto

Bisexual

Prophetess

Head Scientist

without you in it

5'2" / 157 cm height

Curiosity is one of the great secrets of happiness.

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Naomi Sato

POSTED ON Apr 29, 2024 22:01:51 GMT

[nospaces]

[attr="class","nomitest9"]

[attr="class","body"]

Here comes the relief, a tidal wave crashing against the shore of imminent tragedy. Her breath hitches and she bursts into tears, the word cupcake smashing through her grief like a hammer. Alive would have been a mercy - so much more than she deserves - but alive and still hers? Why, it's a goddamn miracle.[break][break]
Tears fall like rain - stain her cheeks, soak the gauze - and she's folding in on herself, pressing her cheek into Parker's lap. It is an exorcism of emotion, selfish and cathartic, white-knuckled fists strangling the bed linens as she sobs and shudders. And when it passes, a storm out to sea, she looks up at Parker with puffy crimson eyes - and they are her eyes, without a trace of white or blue.[break][break]
Parker's next question, much easier to stomach, jolts her into action. She tugs on the threads that tie her to the Unown, communicating her will to the collective. The channels are open, as wide as they've ever been, and she feels a tingling on the back of her neck as she listens to their report.[break][break]
Gone, they sing across time and space. An empty, charred grove. The aftermath of a forest fire. They're gone.[break][break]
"I don't know," she admits. "I think I...hurt them, though."[break][break]
But I hurt you, too.

TAGS – parker jones[break]
NOTES – SOCIAL

[attr="class","pkmn"]

Shiny Unown-K (Kallistatus) | Levitate | Hidden Power, Shadow Sneak | Divine Immanence Z-Move | DARK TERA SHARD

[attr="class","credit"]

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crow

six

she/her

twenty-five

march 21

mauville

gay

debt collector

grunt

5'6 height

chaotic stupid, i'll get used to feeling useless

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I cannot conceive of a universe

POSTED ON Apr 29, 2024 23:10:19 GMT

nomi breaks anyway and throws herself over parker's lap. she goes to sit up, but her shoulder feels heavy too, and she vaguely remembers the sensation of getting shot by - her brother/confidant/groomsman/friend - the councilwoman's lapdog.

hot air comes out of her nose and she gives up the ghost on sitting up. nothing about her body wants to work with her right now. it wants to go back to sleep and forget everything all over again. it wants her to go far, far away so it can heal.

"fuckin' hate morphine," she mutters.

she half-closes her eyes, relieved when nomi doesn't tell her that they're dead or some wild shit like that. she couldn't live with herself if she let nomes cross that line. her non-bandaged hand rests on the back of nomi's head, clumsy fingers sifting through the new blue locks. her tongue is thick.

"you let kallistatus dye your hair?"
Naomi Sato
☉

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played by

nellethiel

Nomi; The Visionary

She/Her

November 9

Ecruteak, Johto

Bisexual

Prophetess

Head Scientist

without you in it

5'2" / 157 cm height

Curiosity is one of the great secrets of happiness.

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1,354 posts

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TAG WITH @nomi

Naomi Sato

POSTED ON May 7, 2024 2:49:19 GMT

[nospaces]

[attr="class","nomitest9"]

[attr="class","body"]

Calloused fingers test out her new hair, twine their way to the back of her head. Nomi clears her throat, trying to rally around Parker's continued survival, grasping at gratitude with every breath.[break][break]
"Let?" She blinks, trying to remember the details. It's all one bright beam of blue.[break][break]
She glances at Kallistatus, who shimmers into view, hovering by Parker's shoulder. Its singular eye is unreadable, save for the tiniest hint of...something? Nomi focuses, reaching out with her mind, and finds that the shiny Unown-K is twinged with remorse.[break][break]
"I don't know how it happened," she admits. "I didn't try to change it."[break][break]
Strong emotions had triggered her powers in the past, but nothing quite like this. Nothing physical: a more permanent change. She reaches up to briefly cover Parker's hand with her own, as if to acknowledge the transformation as real.[break][break]
"It's shorter now, too."[break][break]
She pauses, a faint blush spreading across her cheeks. An echo of the past Butterfree that used to flutter around in her stomach at the mere sight of Parker.[break][break]"Do you...do you like it?"

TAGS – parker jones[break]
NOTES – SOCIAL

[attr="class","pkmn"]

Shiny Unown-K (Kallistatus) | Levitate | Hidden Power, Shadow Sneak | Divine Immanence Z-Move | DARK TERA SHARD

[attr="class","credit"]

✦

close tab

played by

crow

six

she/her

twenty-five

march 21

mauville

gay

debt collector

grunt

5'6 height

chaotic stupid, i'll get used to feeling useless

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477 posts

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TAG WITH @parker