“Look. You’ve organized one big race and there’s a second big one coming up. Getting a public event like that is huge, you know. I’m here on the quieter side with just taking tours of the Sanctuary grounds when I’m not busy with the challengers that keep showing up at the front door,” he chuckled.

He then poked at the empty basket of fries, running a finger along the salt that remained on the paper before sighing.

“Having a Gym isn’t about winning at all, it’s about teaching whoever comes through that door about what you want to impart. Although… my style got a bit cramped because of the ‘you know what’,” he hummed with a pointed eye roll.

(The eye roll wasn’t for him, though. He would know if it was.)

“If we win, then fancy that, a rare occurrence! Kind of like winning the lottery. But then again, that’s kind of why everyone comes knocking on my door because I’m admittedly one of the easiest to get a badge off of when traditional battles are considered.”

He then took one more sip of his drink.

“…of course I give everyone a run for their money when they come knocking for the non-trad challenges—I mean, you know it because you went through it yourself! So did Isaac Merlo,” he cackled.

The poor Pikipek, though—he was sure that this wasn’t one of the ones living in the aviary (or the one that had become yet another indoor Pokémon because the ovine herd was pretty tight with keeping an eye on their other companions at the flat)—was literally screaming and crying indignities the moment the ‘not-quite-a-Salamence’ approached, before flying out of the Roaring Moon’s mouth and like.

Making a beeline straight towards Alexei chittering and chirping about how they were just minding their business and all that.

“…one last question, do they eat other Pokémon?” he clarified; making a mental note to read the report later after the match was over.

Even if the Dragonite wanted to take a swipe at the ‘Roaring Moon’, his Salamence decided to step up to the plate—so it was going to be a showdown between the ‘known’ and the ‘unknown’ along with…

“Hera!” he exclaimed as the Gyarados let herself out of her Dive Ball, roaring and just really, ready to cut a bitch get going.

(Looks like someone was excited.)

“You get first move!” he said as he made his way over to his side of the battlefield; Salamence and Gyarados ready for one hell of a showdown.

This was it—this was the turn that Safeugard would finally go down—and by then he had to either slam the gas pedal or hit the brakes—he had a nagging suspicion one of the two Pokémon Cian brought with him had some kind of a status move asides from Disable…

The kindly ol’ grampa dragon swung his head around, watching as the rocks railed straight into him but refused to give up—and retaliated with another Extrasensory burst.

Meanwhile, on the yellow Oricorio’s end—a Mirror Move of swirling and dancing caused the incoming Hydro Pump to rocket in the same direction; aiming for a cancelling of the move out because she needed the next steps to go all-out!

---

Drampa & Oricorio (Pom-pom) are out on the field!

Drampa gets slammed by the Ancient Power however weathers on and retaliates with Extrasensory on Kecleon; while Oricorio used Mirror Move to blast back with a Hydro Pump at the Froakie as well in an attempt to cancel the attack out!

“See, that’s also the thing,” he chuckled once he’d gotten on the back of his own Pidgeot, who spread her wings and was ready to take to the air.

“In the actual gym matches, it’s all natural flight and maneuvers, no relying on Pokémon moves too! Don’t count out the winds up there too,” he added—because he remembered how windy it had been when boruta maher had come knocking on his door to take the jousting option.

And what a fun match that was, too!

“So it’s also a test of trusting your companion’s natural flight instincts. You know, bonds and all that,” he went on, absolutely not sorry with the alliteration he made there.

(There really was a reason why he was the #1 non-trad specialist around these parts.)

“You ready?”

The Corvisquire didn’t need to say anything as she flew down to join the Bagon who’d literally just plopped down on the ground because even she was exhausted herself. Why was it so hot out here?!

(Steel and fire never mixed too well, but then again what did, anyway?)

The Murkrow on his shoulder chittered in Miss Freya’s direction in welcome, making a little ‘bowing’ gesture with one of his wings.

“Mostly busy, the challengers don’t stop coming! I’ve come pretty close to a couple wins, and one draw—a hard-fought one. You should’ve seen the Mega Garchomp that Michael Navidson brought out onto the field in his match; one hell of a stubborn jackass—and I mean that in the good way!” he recounted.

“Right now, though… well, she’s supposed to be out here on a training trip to increase her resistance to fire but well, see what she’s doing,” he continued as he pointed to where his Corvisquire had joined the Bagon with their shared exhaustion.

It was here he belatedly realized he was carrying something on his back—a small-enough body bag slung on his back that had snacks for Pokémon—lovingly handmade by Guillermo Marceliño of course.

“I have the Pokémon snacks to go around, can I give them some if that’s alright with you?” he offered as he tilted his head down at the Bagon and the Shelgon.

If there was a way to channel his friend’s RBF he would’ve done so already.

So instead, he turned to where the ‘hipsters’ were with this unreadable look on his face.

“Excuse me, my boyfriend is working in Fortree right now as the Ranger Captain,” he began with this dangerously-sweet tone in his voice, although if one was smart enough to read the aura around him it was definitely veering into the ‘don’t test me’ area.


“And the last time I checked, Navy is straight as an arrow, why don’t you ask him yourself?”

The belated realization that he faintly smelled of cola hit him a few moments afterward.

“Sorry about that,” he apologized with a wave of his arm. “Might need to wash the jacket off, though,” and with that he took off the dark-blue jacket he was wearing—but not before fishing out his wallet from it.

“Well, show me your Gym, I mean, you already saw mine all the way back out in Fortree,” he continued with the same unreadable grin on his face.

Was it time for a take two?

Apparently, Hera the Gyarados was the one dictating the whims of their rematch. Highly insistent on coming along the moment he realized that what Navy had said was indeed, fucking real (there was indeedy a Gym down in Dewford) they had to make the trip.

Mostly because she wanted her vengeance. (That and she was better than ever now!)

(Un)fortunately or should we say hilariously the only mode of battle available in this Gym was traditional—the kind that he himself was… he needed some serious catching up in this field.

There was a reason why he was the #1 non-trad gym specialist around these parts.

So, anyway, after taking the Teleport express to Dewford, he would eventually find himself outside the Gym grounds, several Pokéballs in his pocket—and one hell of a lot of anxiety because holy shit, what the fuck, why did it feel like he was going to self-combust on the spot out of sheer nervousness?!

“You know how… how different it feels? Talking with someone about the entire experience who wasn’t there?” he began quietly as he let his fingers idle and fuss around with the handmade quilt.

“Like how there’s a gulf between you and the other person—wait. Wait, hold up,” he backtracked the moment she mentioned that she and a certain silver-haired man were no longer together.

His thoughts went a thousand miles a minute at her proclamation.

“Was there any other underlying reason for the separation? Is it—is it temporary? Is there like, any chance of you two getting back together down the road again?”

Sorry for all the questions, however his behavior swung around like a hawk the moment she mentioned that she’d gone through a breakup of her own.

---

who ordered even more emotional damage?! timelined after this as if he didn’t have enough already good grief

“You should let your Garchomp fly, even if it’s just from time to time. See how that turned out,” he chuckled as he made his way across the arena and gave his Gyarados a pat; seeing as she’d already decided to pass out in a nap of her own on the ground.

“Geez, Hera, not here,” he chuckled as he popped her Dive Ball open and recalled her in a flash of red light as well. He then smirked at the little round of self-critiquing the other was giving himself.

“Well, if you have a peanut gallery as large as mine, and having that peanut gallery out watching their rep duke it out… easy to see why it happened the way it did,” he cackled once he was close enough.

“Even if it was a draw, you still gave me one hell of a match. You didn’t give up either, even if I leveled the playing field,” he added with a hum—he was already holding something in his palm.

“Hey, it still counted as a 2 on 2, just that they focus-fired on their own individual battles,” he went on with another chuckle, gesturing for the other to hold out his hand.



“For that show of charisma, uniqueness, bucketsful of nerve, and one hell of a lot of talent—you deserve this, even if we ended in a draw. Congratulations—and wait, you have a gym, too?” he blinked.

That was a surprise.

Due to the Yanma lasering in on the incoming Wild Charge attack, he’d barely noticed the incoming bolt of Thunder—however, Alexei did (and he’d even fished out a pair of shades and snapped them on just in time for the equivalent of three flash-bang grenades going off all at once) and he barely hid the cringe that crossed his features at the stubborn, persistent, airborne Shinx.

Before the Yanma could—well, a dead-square hit was most certainly enough to fry him, and the valiant dual-type would come falling out of the skies before a red beam of light saved him from becoming a squashed dragonfly pancake on the ground.

“Wow,” he began as he made his way across the arena towards Lam, “talk about incredibly stubborn!”

He whistled as he approached, already holding something small and cold in his hands.

“Were you around for the time people had to like, ring a bell at Meteor Falls and make some kind of wish? Because I’ve yet to encounter another Pokémon that knows Dragon Hammer asides from the one I taught that’s not an Alolan Exeggutor,” he cackled once he was close enough.

Man, that shiny Shinx really took one hell of a beating.

“We came down to the wire, literally, and it was your Shinx that came out on top,” he continued as he gestured for the other to hold out his hand.



“For showing charisma, uniqueness, a hell of a lot of nerve, and talent—you deserve this badge. Congratulations!”

There was a Pikipek on the windowsill, chittering to him on the other side of the glass.

What was up with his avian armada always taking up a defensive line whenever he was admitted to the hospital, even if just for an afternoon for his blood work?

Oh, that’s right…

The moment said Pikipek suddenly took off, though, he realized he was no longer alone in the room as he saw a familiar reflection in the glass window—

“Oh, hello there Miss Elise,” he began as he turned to face her, weary but friendly smile on his face.

“Sorry you had to see me all like this. But, believe it or not, I actually insisted to come here today. M’boyfriend almost fell out of his clothes when I brought it up.”

Complete with a wry smirk on his face.

---

who ordered even more emotional damage?! timelined after this as if he didn’t have enough already good grief

“Wow, hissy—did they not teach you about figures of speech in school or something?” he blinked.

He then spun the purple pool noodle in his hands before giving a test ‘thwack’ against the rack, listening to the satisfying snapping noise it made.

A few moments later, a shadow flew overhead, circling a few times before coming in for a landing—it was Idun, his own Pidgeot.

“…and apparently she wants to meet this challenge in mid-air, on her terms, too,” he chuckled quietly as he gave the Pidgeot a pat on the head before he swung himself up on her back—no saddle and all.

Honestly, therein lie the major difference between them two; one rode with saddle, the other without.

“So basically how it goes,” he continued as he pointed to the skies, “…is that we charge at each other. Only instead of jousting on land, first to get three hits wins. And no, your partner Pokémon isn’t allowed to attack unless the circumstances are dire,” he explained.

“Got any other questions before we start?”

If Miss Elise was to look for him, he would not be at the Fortree Gym.

In fact there was nobody there today, seeing as the Gym proper itself was closed and only a skeleton crew of staffers were around for emergency services should the Sanctuary get unexpected patient visits or cases rushed their way…

The next logical place to look for him would be over at Fortree General, also known as the one place he never wanted to visit. On most days.

However, after what had happened down at Route 120? After those twenty years that had blipped by in an instant? Who the fuck wouldn’t be scared of suddenly wanting to catch up on…

Yeah.

And so it would be here that she would find him in a private room. Physically he looked alright, but deep inside?

Who the hell said he was alright, anyway?

Instead of the standard white, thin blanket, she would see a handmade quilt that had cute avianid Pokémon stitched into its face spread out on the bed—and the Birddad™ himself, looking absolutely bored as he was staring out the window.

Ugh.

Why did these check-ups take fucking forever?!

(Guillermo Marceliño was out somewhere, for now.)

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who ordered even more emotional damage?! timelined after this as if he didn’t have enough already good grief