it's all so incredibly loud [c]

i used to dream in the dark of palisades park

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played by

thorn

the Harbinger
he/him
37
october 28th
circhester, galar
demisexual
underboss
the harbinger
I want corruption, I think I'm the devil in disguise.
awards
8,667 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gavin
Cillian Quinn
it's all so incredibly loud [c]
POSTED ON Oct 27, 2020 4:54:50 GMT
Cillian Quinn Avatar
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Shadows shift as Gavin enters the room and the light bends around his silhouette. It's late; he's late in getting home, more often than not these days. Exhaustion reveals itself in the lines around his eyes and the dark bags that shadow them. Stress robs him of sleep.[break][break]

It's not just the stress of change, of Rocket's slow acclimation to an overdue shift in direction. It's them, and the distance that's slowly settled between them. He'd dismissed it at first. Emma didn't want to talk about it, and Gavin didn't want to press. He'd told himself that things would get better.[break][break]

They haven't.[break][break]

"All right, love?"[break][break]

He reaches out, not for the first time, in the hopes of stirring change.


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played by

castaway

the wolf
she/her
thirty
october 30
lumiose city, kalos
bisexual demi-romantic
rocket beast
beast
Are you strong enough to stand protecting both your heart and mine?
awards
1,571 posts
Emma Wolfe DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @wolfe
Emma Wolfe
it's all so incredibly loud [c]
POSTED ON Oct 27, 2020 23:39:35 GMT
Emma Wolfe Avatar
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It makes her sick, knowing that she feels dread when he comes home. That whenever she sees him, all she can think of is the way the Lugia had torn apart the camp, had annihilated everything in its path as if they had been nothing. She was scared, more than she ever had been. Fear was a poison, and she was suffering its ill effects. She had become afraid of him.[break][break]

When he approaches, she remains by a window, avoiding his gaze, his concern. Emma swallows as he speaks, aware of the pit in her stomach and the lump in her throat. She is uneasy, agitated, quiet. The woman turns because the air shifts and he's reaching for her. It takes everything in her to not stiffen or shy away from his touch, to feign normality.[break][break]

But there is a flicker, there, of that uncertainty, that she cannot hide. It comes in the way she speaks.[break][break]

"Gavin."[break][break]


[break]

notes: ...

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played by

thorn

the Harbinger
he/him
37
october 28th
circhester, galar
demisexual
underboss
the harbinger
I want corruption, I think I'm the devil in disguise.
awards
8,667 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gavin
Cillian Quinn
it's all so incredibly loud [c]
POSTED ON Oct 28, 2020 6:31:13 GMT
Cillian Quinn Avatar
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Emma tries, to her credit, to pretend. She does not shy away from him physically; on that front, they have had no issue. Gavin takes comfort in those times that they can lose themselves to passion and he can forget, at least for a fleeting moment, that something is wrong.[break][break]

His stomach twists at the sound of his name.[break][break]

Whatever the poison that spread through their relationship, it had been exacerbated by their assault on the Megalopolan camp. It hadn't occurred to him until they were far from that place and safe, finally safe, that she'd hesitated out of horror. That his own actions were to blame.[break][break]

"Emma," and the strain in his voice is the closest Gavin ever comes to pleading. His fingers delicately trace her skin. "Something's troubling you. Talk to me."


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played by

castaway

the wolf
she/her
thirty
october 30
lumiose city, kalos
bisexual demi-romantic
rocket beast
beast
Are you strong enough to stand protecting both your heart and mine?
awards
1,571 posts
Emma Wolfe DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @wolfe
Emma Wolfe
it's all so incredibly loud [c]
POSTED ON Nov 2, 2020 21:54:57 GMT
Emma Wolfe Avatar
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never be more than a wolf

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The strain in his voice brings no end to the grief and the discomfort that weighs heavily in her chest. His fingers trace her skin and she can feel the pleading within his touch, the desperation, the unease. Her skin jumps at his touch, and she pulls her attention away from his hand to his face when he pleads with her. Her golden eyes search his briefly before avoiding him entirely.[break][break]

"There's nothing to talk about."[break][break]

At least, nothing that she had the stomach to discuss. She had already voiced her fears when he had come home from seeking out Articuno's blessing. She had made her discomfort or her unease apparent (or as apparent as Emma Wolfe ever could) when he had been gifted the shadow Lugia. [break][break]

There was a very real part of her that was afraid of him and of what he was becoming, or what he might become. She resettles her attention on the hand that brushes across her skin. The same hand that had wielded the abomination of a God.[break][break]


[break]

notes: ...

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punki


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close tab

played by

thorn

the Harbinger
he/him
37
october 28th
circhester, galar
demisexual
underboss
the harbinger
I want corruption, I think I'm the devil in disguise.
awards
8,667 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gavin
Cillian Quinn
it's all so incredibly loud [c]
POSTED ON Nov 6, 2020 6:09:34 GMT
Cillian Quinn Avatar
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Her words cut deep, a knife between his ribs. When she looks away, a lump forms in Gavin's throat. Emma was the first person he'd ever loved, truly, that light and airy feeling that had been so new — is it heartbreak, then, that sinks and settles in his gut?[break][break]

Part of him wants to drop the subject; they had been in a sort of stasis since Walsh had assumed power and that nagging voice in the back of his head tells him that stasis is better than the crushing finality of an end. If he pushed her too far, would she leave him? It's his pride that makes him resolute in his decision.[break][break]

"Nothing will change if we don't," he points out. He retracts his touch. Too often they've ignored their problems by indulging in one another, any excuse to avoid the elephant in the room. "It feels like I'm losing you, Em."


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close tab

played by

castaway

the wolf
she/her
thirty
october 30
lumiose city, kalos
bisexual demi-romantic
rocket beast
beast
Are you strong enough to stand protecting both your heart and mine?
awards
1,571 posts
Emma Wolfe DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @wolfe
Emma Wolfe
it's all so incredibly loud [c]
POSTED ON Nov 8, 2020 7:55:42 GMT
Emma Wolfe Avatar
[nospaces][googlefont=Open+Sans:400,700,700i|Oswald:300,600]

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never be more than a wolf

[attr=class,lyric2]
at your door


[attr=class,bulk]
Nothing will change if we don't.[break][break]

Dread settles like a heavy stone in the pit of her stomach. It is cold and uncomfortable, making her skin crawl and her thoughts grow dark and murky. [break][break]

And then he pulls away and she follows his hand with her gaze. There is a part of her that regrets the way she's acting, regrets the fear that keeps her at arms length from him. But she cannot stop her sense of self-preservation.[break][break]

"It feels like I'm losing you, Gavin."[break][break]


[break]

notes: ...

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punki


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close tab

played by

thorn

the Harbinger
he/him
37
october 28th
circhester, galar
demisexual
underboss
the harbinger
I want corruption, I think I'm the devil in disguise.
awards
8,667 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gavin
Cillian Quinn
it's all so incredibly loud [c]
POSTED ON Nov 8, 2020 8:13:26 GMT
Cillian Quinn Avatar
[nospaces][googlefont=Open+Sans:400,700,700i|Oswald:300,600]

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CREATURES OF HABIT

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CARRION FLOWERS


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Strong though he was, Gavin feels helpless against her scrutiny.[break][break]

"Have I changed, somehow, since Walsh?" His words are soft rather than challenging, but he meets her gaze. "Or is it just that you're afraid I might?"[break][break]

He hasn't forgotten their conversation in the aftermath of Shoal Cave. How she thought of him, then: power-hungry, reckless. How she must think of him now, with Lugia at his beck and call. His stomach twists uncomfortably.


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close tab

played by

castaway

the wolf
she/her
thirty
october 30
lumiose city, kalos
bisexual demi-romantic
rocket beast
beast
Are you strong enough to stand protecting both your heart and mine?
awards
1,571 posts
Emma Wolfe DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @wolfe
Emma Wolfe
it's all so incredibly loud [c]
POSTED ON Nov 8, 2020 8:23:30 GMT
Emma Wolfe Avatar
[nospaces][googlefont=Open+Sans:400,700,700i|Oswald:300,600]

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never be more than a wolf

[attr=class,lyric2]
at your door


[attr=class,bulk]
"Yes, because you already have."[break][break]

Emma searches his amber gaze, prying for something unseen. Something she isn't even sure she's looking for.[break][break]

Her thoughts trace back to their first disagreement regarding Articuno. He had come back empty-handed, beaten, bruised from his journey. Now, he held within arms reach a demon with the face of a God. [break][break]

"How far are you going to go? What are you trying to prove?"[break][break]


[break]

notes: ...

[attr=class,ooc-notes]
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punki


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close tab

played by

thorn

the Harbinger
he/him
37
october 28th
circhester, galar
demisexual
underboss
the harbinger
I want corruption, I think I'm the devil in disguise.
awards
8,667 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gavin
Cillian Quinn
it's all so incredibly loud [c]
POSTED ON Nov 8, 2020 8:28:56 GMT
Cillian Quinn Avatar
[nospaces][googlefont=Open+Sans:400,700,700i|Oswald:300,600]

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"How, Emma? Enlighten me."[break][break]

Though not rhetorical, he offers more in his own defense before he lets her answer. "What makes you think I'm trying to prove something with this? It wasn't my choice, Emma, but I'm adapting to it. That's what I do."[break][break]

It's why he was still with Rocket after all these years, after all they'd done.[break][break]

"This isn't like Articuno. Lugia hasn't chosen me; Walsh did, and I'd rather it were me than someone else."[break][break]

He quiets, giving her the floor.


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punki


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close tab

played by

castaway

the wolf
she/her
thirty
october 30
lumiose city, kalos
bisexual demi-romantic
rocket beast
beast
Are you strong enough to stand protecting both your heart and mine?
awards
1,571 posts
Emma Wolfe DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @wolfe
Emma Wolfe
it's all so incredibly loud [c]
POSTED ON Nov 8, 2020 8:41:50 GMT
Emma Wolfe Avatar
[nospaces][googlefont=Open+Sans:400,700,700i|Oswald:300,600]

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never be more than a wolf

[attr=class,lyric2]
at your door


[attr=class,bulk]
His words bite harder than she expects, and she stiffens, shifting her body both away from physically and so as to not face him directly. The cold shoulder, essentially. Her teeth set against each other as Gavin interjects with more excuses.[break][break]

It makes her angry, but more than that, it makes her afraid. [break][break]

"That is your arrogance talking, Gavin. You don't have to do this, any of this. You don't owe them anything."[break][break]

She's overstepping, she knows. But she loves him, and he deserves the truth.[break][break]

"I know you're trying to prove something with this. You are desperate for recognition and praise, Gavin. Walsh is not your parents, and you need to understand that."[break][break]


[break]

notes: ...

[attr=class,ooc-notes]
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punki


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close tab

played by

thorn

the Harbinger
he/him
37
october 28th
circhester, galar
demisexual
underboss
the harbinger
I want corruption, I think I'm the devil in disguise.
awards
8,667 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gavin
Cillian Quinn
it's all so incredibly loud [c]
POSTED ON Nov 8, 2020 8:52:21 GMT
Cillian Quinn Avatar
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SOCIAL

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CREATURES OF HABIT

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CARRION FLOWERS


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He is hurt, at first, but then she cuts straight to bone and Gavin goes cold. It is not like last time, where he'd started shaking and shut down. This time, at the thought of his parents, Gavin's lips curl into a soundless snarl.[break][break]

"No," he says, and his tone has gone sharp and stiff. "No, you don't get to bring my parents into this. You have no idea what they were like, what it was like for me." His nostrils flare as he draws breath. She'd learned in small doses the sort of man they'd raised, but he kept the worst of their cards close to his chest. "I'm not a child seeking validation."[break][break]

The thought that she'd see him as such disgusts him, and Gavin can't decide if he's angrier with her or with himself for ever giving off an impression of such weakness and desperation.[break][break]

"I seek power for protection, not for their praise."[break][break]

He practically spits the words.


[attr=class,ooc-notes]
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punki


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close tab

played by

castaway

the wolf
she/her
thirty
october 30
lumiose city, kalos
bisexual demi-romantic
rocket beast
beast
Are you strong enough to stand protecting both your heart and mine?
awards
1,571 posts
Emma Wolfe DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @wolfe
Emma Wolfe
it's all so incredibly loud [c]
POSTED ON Nov 8, 2020 8:59:41 GMT
Emma Wolfe Avatar
[nospaces][googlefont=Open+Sans:400,700,700i|Oswald:300,600]

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social thread

[attr=class,lyric1]
never be more than a wolf

[attr=class,lyric2]
at your door


[attr=class,bulk]
She's struck a nerve, but that was the point. Anger was an emotion she understood and could read. Silence, indifference, deflection, that was something she couldn't handle right now. She wanted him to be angry, to be upset.[break][break]

And it seems that she had struck gold.[break][break]

Emma holds his gaze with a degree of unshakable certainty despite the rage that boils behind his eyes. He snarls at her, his voice biting, and she remains unshakable in the face of it. [break][break]

"Then prove it."[break][break]

Emma follows his movements with a steady, careful gaze as he spits his words. They sting because she can hear the truth behind them, his truth, that he holds onto so desperately. Perhaps she is selfish, herself. But she had seen the last person she loved succumb to darkness after one taste too many.[break][break]

She couldn't watch it happen again.[break][break]

"Keep telling yourself that."[break][break]


[break]

notes: ...

[attr=class,ooc-notes]
[attr=class,tagline]










[attr=class,punkianger-emcredit]
punki


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close tab

played by

thorn

the Harbinger
he/him
37
october 28th
circhester, galar
demisexual
underboss
the harbinger
I want corruption, I think I'm the devil in disguise.
awards
8,667 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gavin
Cillian Quinn
it's all so incredibly loud [c]
POSTED ON Nov 8, 2020 9:06:42 GMT
Cillian Quinn Avatar
[nospaces][googlefont=Open+Sans:400,700,700i|Oswald:300,600]

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SOCIAL

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CREATURES OF HABIT

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CARRION FLOWERS


[attr=class,bulk]

"Prove it how?" he demands, meeting the challenge of her gaze with fire in his own. "By seeking your validation, because you refuse to believe me otherwise?"[break][break]

He steps back from her, shaking his head with disappointment and vitriol. Perhaps it had been the wrong idea to break the delicate balance of their stasis, for his anger builds and burns beneath the surface. She had wished for his fury and it had been granted, but there is no tempering his words, now.[break][break]

"Like you'll keep telling yourself I'm something that I'm not?"


[attr=class,ooc-notes]
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punki


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played by

castaway

the wolf
she/her
thirty
october 30
lumiose city, kalos
bisexual demi-romantic
rocket beast
beast
Are you strong enough to stand protecting both your heart and mine?
awards
1,571 posts
Emma Wolfe DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @wolfe
Emma Wolfe
it's all so incredibly loud [c]
POSTED ON Nov 8, 2020 9:21:20 GMT
Emma Wolfe Avatar
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never be more than a wolf

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at your door


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Emma doesn't answer because she doesn't have one. She hadn't had one for Freya, she hadn't had one for Nikolai. Both times she had stood on the sidelines watching them kill themselves and she had been helpless to stop it. She was helpless even now.[break][break]

And his words sting because they aren't true. Emma had never wanted him to seek validation from her, and she had never thought of him as anything less than he was -- at least not until now.[break][break]

The man parts from her more distinctly and its as if a cold front has wedged its way between them. They're breaking, and she isn't sure she's capable of saving him, or herself.[break][break]

"You're taking yourself down a path I can't follow again. I've lost every person I've ever loved because of power and their obsession with it. They told me the same empty lies, Gav-- they promised me they were doing it to protect themselves, their people, their beliefs. And look where it got them. They're dead."[break][break]


[break]

notes: ...

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punki


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played by

thorn

the Harbinger
he/him
37
october 28th
circhester, galar
demisexual
underboss
the harbinger
I want corruption, I think I'm the devil in disguise.
awards
8,667 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gavin
Cillian Quinn
it's all so incredibly loud [c]
POSTED ON Nov 8, 2020 9:27:03 GMT
Cillian Quinn Avatar
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SOCIAL

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CREATURES OF HABIT

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CARRION FLOWERS


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"This wasn't my choice!"[break][break]

That she implies he's lying cuts deeper even than the mention of his parents, of his weakness. He was a natural born liar, a criminal, but he'd been honest with her. He'd gone so far as to tell her his name, the secret he guarded the most.[break][break]

"This power was given to me. I didn't go looking for it. I didn't ask for it. But if you think I'm going to confine Lugia to a prison for the rest of its life because it had the misfortune of being corrupted? No."[break][break]

There's a painful pause as he reflects upon old memories.[break][break]

"I've been a prisoner, I won't do that to something else."


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punki


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img
The Shula Region
Hogwarts AU
RPG Unlimited
MR
The Enroi Region
N:FB
Vyrehaven
Celestial Guardians, AU Sailor Moon RP
EO GENESIS
Code and Crown: An advanced literate warriors cats RP, set in medieval times
Swords Clashing