"I did," She cried, "I did let them die."
[break][break]


Because she wasn't enough. Because she was never enough.
[break][break]

"Fuck, I thought--- I thought I was getting somewhere, you know? I was finally fucking getting somewhere."


[break][break]


Her shoulders shuddered violently as sobs continued to spill out from her. It'd bridge the line of gagging, nearly tipping over every so often, but mainly being contained by the arms that anchor her.
[break][break]


"I had to give away everything."
[break][break]


Her ideals.
[break][break]


Her hopes.
[break][break]


Her dreams.
[break][break]


"But I did it. I fucking did it cause I thought it'd mean something."
[break][break]


She wouldn't have the strength of a MATIAS SILPH or a Melody Miro , but that didn't matter. Because that wasn't the type of power she was interested in.
[break][break]


"But it meant nothing, I meant nothing. And people suffered because of it."

[break][break]

[attr="class","ooc"] CIAN MAHER[break]


[attr="class","pkspr pkmn-ditto"]

"you didn't," he reassures, "you're already somewhere."[break][break]

he fights back tears as well.[break][break]

"you aren't nothing, penny. don't fucking say that about yourself."[break][break]

he doesn't mean to swear but it slips out of him, riled up because he wishes he could tell her how he feels. show her how he sees her.[break][break]

"you mean everything to me."

[attr="class","ooc"]PENELOPE LIVY[break]

[attr="class","pkspr pkmn-kecleon"]

"How?!"
[break][break]

A strangled voice came out, conveying the isolation she faced. There was no stopping her, no quelling the fire that ravaged her confidence.
[break][break]

Her shoulders shook intensely, fighting against Cian's arms of warmth and security, undeserving of their affection.
[break][break]

Cian deserved someone better.
[break][break]

Someone who didn't just shatter and become another pile of useless glass.



[break][break]

[attr="class","ooc"] CIAN MAHER[break]


[attr="class","pkspr pkmn-ditto"]

there is no one better for him than her, that much he's sure of. but to explain that to her now in the state that she's in would amount to very little. sometimes, it's okay to just cry it out. to feel these emotions instead of fighting them.[break][break]

a stray tear rolls down the side of his face. he shrugs a shoulder up to wipe it.[break][break]

"i love you, okay? you're the strongest person i know."

[attr="class","ooc"]PENELOPE LIVY[break]

[attr="class","pkspr pkmn-kecleon"]

Soft words were the final blows necessary to blow out the rest of the dam.
[break][break]

"Arceus, Cian.."
[break][break]

Shoulders slacking, body trembling, Penelope spun around and hastily wrapped her arms around him, desperate for a crumb of the warmth she had just finished denying.
[break][break]

Hot and cold, up and down, her emotions were left erratic, unable to settle down to one explicit feeling.
[break][break]

Fingers dug into the wrinkles of his shirt. Yet again, he had become her one and only lifeline.
[break][break]

"Please promise me you're not lying. Please."
[break][break]

She dug her face further into her chest, panting heavily, all while the tears continued to pour without an end. Pain still ebbed across her head and legs, but compared to the roaring of her heart, it was nothing more than a prick here and there. A momentary reminder of the source of her anguish.
[break][break]

"I don't want to lose you. Even if I'm not good enough, I can't lose you too. Please."
[break][break]

[attr="class","ooc"] CIAN MAHER[break]


[attr="class","pkspr pkmn-ditto"]

when her arms finally wrap around him, he returns the same, pulling her into him and holding her as though doing anything less would allow her to drift away, and he could not have that. not now, not ever.[break][break]

"no, of course not. why would i be lying?"[break][break]

he caresses the back of her head.[break][break]

"i always try to be honest with you and i mean it when i say you're the strongest person i know. you're so, so good. you're like, pretty much perfect for me."[break][break]

a breath.[break][break]

"and you're not going to lose me."

[attr="class","ooc"]PENELOPE LIVY[break]

[attr="class","pkspr pkmn-kecleon"]

Cian's words burned.
[break][break]

Crisp, sharpened blades of molten heat carved into her, looking to do the best, but missing the mark ever-so-slightly.
[break][break]

He was a liar. In the same way he had lied to her about his previous association with rocket, he was lying here, to her face, about things the world had already told her to be false.
[break][break]

Was it pity that moved him? Some sick instinct to soothe her down for the eventual reality check that awaited her around the corner.
[break][break]

Her fingers dug deeper into him and she buried her face into his chest, letting her tears soak his shirt and her heavy pants to be muffled.
[break][break]

"I love you Cian."
[break][break]

Were the only words she could manage through the sobs. While doubt still lingered, she kept it tamed beneath her tongue. Hurting him felt worse than accepting his lies as truth. As long as he stayed with her, it didn't matter anyways.

[break][break]

[attr="class","ooc"] CIAN MAHER[break]


[attr="class","pkspr pkmn-ditto"]

they aren't lies, but perhaps one day, she'd be able to realize as much. until then, all he can do is to be here for her. with her. together.[break][break]

"i love you too, penny."[break][break]

for however long she needs, he'll hold her, accepting her for who she is, strengths and flaws and all.[break][break]

"so, so much."

[attr="class","ooc"]PENELOPE LIVY[break]

[attr="class","pkspr pkmn-kecleon"]