"Hey June, got a heads-up that a bumper car is having problems. You got it?"

"Do I have a choice?"

"Not at all. Get on it and fix it, please."

"Aye Aye, captain."

Prick.

June sighed, put the walkie-talkie back in her blue, grease stained overalls, and started her trip on over to the bumper cars. How the hell did you malfunction a bumper car? They were literally designed to take a beating and be perfectly fine. If she ever figured out who was responsible, she'd interrogate them.

Unfortunately for her, as she rounded the corner of a food stall and laid eyes on the broken car, it'd be a lot harder than initially thought. "Howard?! What the hell did you do?"

The archeologist would watch the bane of his recent existence quickly closing the distance between the two, a dull red toolbox in tow. She hopped the barricade that separated the crowd from a battle royal of rubber and slapped a free hand onto the bumper car. "Here, help me pull this thing off to the side. Not about to get a broken leg because of... whatever the hell you did."

"Sorry, sorry. Probably not your fault. I hope. Just... how?" She asked. Since that stupid Electrike wanted to take its sweet ass time in evolving and becoming useful, she had no choice but to take a temporary position wherever she could. A Talonflame could only fly for so long and so far before it needed something called 'a break'.

And she had another... three hours before she got hers. Lucky they were paying well. "Also, been a while since I saw you. What brings you to a place like this? All the way in Lilycove?"

---

howard slayte

"No! No! Howard groaned before his head hit the wheel with a dull thump. The archaeologist had never felt so defeated. He had spent money on tokens and everything, and it had all been for nothing! Once Team Rocket learned he was slacking off instead of doing his job, they would kill him. Every version of the conversation Howard imagined ended with him getting throttled.

Not a good ending.

It was probably best to get off the smoking bumper car before the smoke made Howard hallucinate. He looked up as he hard a noise that sounded a lot like a familiar woman, and less like the dying screech of a motor that had been mass-produced in Orre. Howard rubbed his eyes and peered through the smoke. Crud, he was hallucinating. The figure peering at him looked awfully similar to a certain delivery girl.

"June?" Howard rubbed his eyes as his soul died. "Oh. Um. Hello!" Howard fumbled his way off the bumper car while coughing smoke. He eyed June like one would eye a dangerous predator. "Archaeology stops for nobody! I'm simply at this carnival doing important research. What brings you around these parks? Parts! I mean parts!"

The bumper car sparked again, and Howard began to sweat. It sparked again, before belching out another cloud of smoke. "I got bullied by a girl shorter than you! I'm innocent! I promise!" Howard continued to sweat.

The bumper car sparked again. Bzzt.

Suddenly, Howard grabbed June by the shoulders and shook her. "June please you gotta help me I can't afford to fix this and I don'twannagetkickedoutofthecarnivalJunepleasehelpI'msorryforeverdoubtingyourskillspleaseeeeeeeee!!!"

---

june sleigh

"Howard, just help me--"

Just as June managed to pull the thing into the far corner, Howard took hold of her and shook her like a kid would with a miltank-bank for any spare poke dollars. Instead of coins, the only thing she dropped was any pretense of being nice. In return to his action, she forcibly removed his arms and pushed him out of the way.

"I'll be the one to drag your ass out if you cause me anymore problems!" She set down the toolbox on top of the metal rail and reached towards the bottom of the car, where rubber met plastic. Whatever the girl did, a loud click rang out and the 'hood' popped open. Thicker black smoke pooled out, which she fanned away with a hurry. 

A sparky, angry motor awaited underneath. No parts looked immediately busted beyond belief. "Well, might be able to fix it... maybe. Something's messed up here, though. Give me a minute or three." June fished into the toolbox. After a few moments and a hmm or two, she pulled out a few tools and swiftly got to work. 

The odds of Howard having any idea on what actions she did to calm the motor down were next to none. Each individual part of the system met the end of a wrench as they were inspected, prodded and even dismantled. Lightning fast hands worked magic with the main motor, ultimately deemed the culprit. It was not a complex machine, but clearly something had fucked up with it. 

After a couple more minutes of tinkering, June leaned back on her back legs and whipped sweat from her brow. No more smoke poured from the block of metal, but the 'mechanic' looked less than pleased. "Not an expert on these electric motors, but I think it'll be good to go. However, services rendered will cost you five-hundred poke dollars."

A smile quickly broke out and a loud snort escaped her nose, "Hah, just kidding." She dropped the hood back onto the car and slapped the top. "Probably need to let 'er sit here for a round or two and then start 'er back up. A cool engine is a happy engine."

STAMP EARNED: FIX A RIDE

---

howard slayte

"Are you sure it's messed up?" Howard poked his head out from behind June as if the bumper car was an angry beast that he had enraged. "Maybe the smoke is a good sign! Maybe I'm just so good at bumper cars that this is how it shows it! I mean, that's what happened when someone hit the Dugtrio-Whack-A-Mole game super hard."

Hopefully June hadn't needed to fix many of those tonight. Whichever genius let fighting-type Pokémon play the game was probably on thin ice. Probably ice as thin as Howard's, given that he was sharing the space with the queen of blackmail. Maybe he could run away before she finished fixing the motor.

Just as he considered sneaking away, June had finished. "Eep! I mean, uh, oh. Splendid!"

What was not so splendid was the cost. As soon as the price washed over him, it was as if Howard wilted. His soul was practically visible as it left his body. June had to be more careful about her money jokes, before Howard actively died on her. Was that how much she was blackmailing him for? Crud, he had to give her the money then. Nervously, he opened his wallet before he learned the truth.

"Oh! Of course, right, yes!" Howard visibly relaxed and sighed. "Seriously, how are you here? Did you get your bike fixed? Can't believe they got you here as a mechanic. How's the pay? Do they offer free cinnamon rolls?"

---

june sleigh

June wiped the thin layer of sweat on her brow and tossed her tools back into the toolbox-- literally. "Woah there pal, one at a time. I have a Talonflame I ride around, that's how I'm here. No, I have no fixed my bike. Me neither. The pay is good enough. And no, there are no free cinnamon rolls."

"Now, unless you want a broken leg or two, I'd get out of the play area. I'm sure that kid would love another go around, even if you're defenseless." She gave a thumbs up to the ride operators and quickly hopped over the first guard rail. If the girl had to wager a guess, it was probably the little kid that looked very proud as she stuck out her tongue at June that had caused the problem.

Stupid kid.

Whatever, the thing was fixed. Enough. Just had to last through the night and it wouldn't be her problem any longer. Better odds than the poor soul that got stuck fixing the whack-a-dugtrio every fifteen minutes. Seriously, who thought letting a Machamp have a go would ever end well?

"So... yea. Here I am. Fixing carnival rides. Better this than sitting at home," June said. "But seriously, what brings you here? Didn't strike me as the type to get competitive with pre-schoolers. Or ride bumper cars."

Or ride the roller coasters. Or ride the merry go round. Or the ferris wheel. Or play whack-a-dugtrio...

---

howard slayte

"Fine, fine. Let's avoid starting a traffic wreck. My insurance probably doesn't cover bumper car injuries." Howard sighed and put down his head in defeat. As the two left the ride's perimeter, Howard slid his finger across his neck at the kid, and then left the brat with those implications as he hopped the rail after June.

"They're fun, and I have a hoard of tokens." Howard shrugged as if it wasn't a big thing, though the price for tokens was borderline outrageous. If Howard had plenty, something was up. That 'something' was a spike in funding for Team Rocket that he was shamelessly spending, given that he could accomplish his task with a fraction of the budget.

June's explanation was pretty standard for her. It seemed to Howard that as long as their was money to be made, she'd avoid her apartment. Howard could relate.

"Bumper cars are the contest of champions! There is nothing more liberating than moving at a snail's pace and being defeated by a ten year old! I'm gonna hop on every ride! Plus, I want to finally conquer that blasted Dugtrio-Whack-A-Mole! They're giving out Dugtrio plushies to people who beat it and I want one! Between it and the Dugtrio Ring Toss, the Whack-A-Dugtrio is way harder!" Howard beamed at her. "You should come along and witness my victory over that machine!"

"Besides..." Howard's voice became taunting as he caught up with June. "Someone will probably have broken it anyways by the time you get over there."

---

STAMP GET! Mention Dugtrio-Ring-Toss!
june sleigh

"If I was the one who got stuck on duty for fixing it tonight, I'd clock you out rather fast," June said. "However, I'm the call girl. I get a call, I go to where they tell me, and I fix whatever's broken. That excludes that particular machine."

The seniors had made all the new mechanics draw sticks to see who would deal with the whack-a-dugtrio. At the time, it felt silly and childish to make them do something so drastic for what would be an easy shift. Hell, the guy on duty for that traded for the short stick.

"Are you kidding me? If that thing even thinks about breaking, all I'll have to do is give it a kick. Problem solved, and I get to dick around for the rest of my shift."

As June and Howard approached the whack-a-dugtrio, though, they could tell that it was very much not alright. It would not get better either, since someone had let their Pangoro get in front of the thing. The mechanic, with a nametag of 'Jim', had long passed the 'anger' stage of grief. He looked rather depressed and tired, with his tools scattered around the machine and an energy drink in his hands. 

"Dumbass," she muttered underneath her breath. For Howard, she pushed him towards the back of the line. "Better get in fast. The delinquents haven't had their fun yet. Once they get over here, you're not getting a turn for the night."

June crossed her arms and hung off to the side. While she was surprised to see Howard here at all, he seemed like the type to froth at the mouth whenever it came to 'free' stuff. That did lead to an interesting thought, though: had he ever gotten his hand caught in a rattata-trap? 

"Now come on, o great warrior, show all us puny mortals just how to actually play this game," she said. Howard wasn't the only one who knew how to get someone's blood boiling. And if he managed to somehow lose the game designed for kids, it'd be all the sweeter.

---

howard slayte

The Whack-a-Dugtrio machine had seen better days.

That was a lie. It had never seen a better day. It had been brought into this world only to be ceaselessly smashed by delinquents who didn't know their own strength, Pokemon capable of crumpling steel, and braggarts showing off their excellency to tired mechanics. All of this had occurred within the twenty-four hours of existence the poor machine had experienced.

It was hard to not feel bad for the poor thing. Or its mechanic. Howard saw that expression in the mirror each time it was time to do some work for Team Rocket. It was hard not to feel bad.

"Alright, I'm gonna rock the socks off Lilycove City." Howard accepted the hammer and have the mechanic a tip of the cap for respect. The game started up with a click and a show of bright lights. It would start off slow, with little Digletts slowly popping out of their holes. Howard clonked those down with relative ease.

What most people didn't know was that Whack-A-Dugtrio was a game of dexterity and prediction. If you were good with your hands, it was impossible to fail the game after a few tries without practice. Unfortunately, Howard was practiced, and his hands were dexterous enough to be placed in the upper brackets of Hoennese dexterity. He wasn't a mechanical savant, capable of fixing and understanding a motor like June. He couldn't use a phone, that was also true. Yet he had spent all of grad school writing papers by hand.

In cursive.

The man was practically unstoppable.

Ding! Ding! Ding! The points went up higher and higher as the historian pounded each Diglett, then Dugtrio, into the dust. Even the mechanic who was contemplating life leaned in to watch this savant work his craft. With the deftness and precision that came from working fossils from stone, Howard eyed the points: 99.

The last Dugtrio came up. This one was the run killer. It barely popped up for a second, before vanishing and ruining the perfect Dugtrio-Whack-A-Mole run. And Howard hit it.

A little too hard. SLAM!

The machine let out a buzz and the lights dimmed. The mechanic's soul died and left his body. Yet Howard didn't seem unfazed. He turned to June with the definition of a shit eating grin.

Then he kicked the machine.

DINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDING!!! The machine blared to life. A perfect score.

---

STAMP GET: Fix a machine!
june sleigh

The mechanic stared, dumbfounded. The illusive one-hundred points... he had-- no, no one had ever seen the likes of it before. Even the small crowd behind the man seemed confused. Or oblivious, as they stared off into space or looked onward with glazed eyes.

However, what cut through the relative silence was a single clap.

Clap. Clap.

"Congrats, Howard," June said, her hands clamped together. "And for all of that hard work, you get... a plushie! Absolutely incredible. Marvelous. Seriously, thank you for your performance for us lowly peoples."

A shit-eating grin covered her face and sarcasm dripped off of every word. Despite the grin that he started, she looked entirely unfazed. If anything, her grin threatened to rival even his own. What a terrible friend she was.

"So, archeology, a shitty movie universe, and whack-a-dugtrio," June counted on her fingers, "Whatever makes you happy, man. Whatever makes you happy."

"Hey June, how's it--"

"Not taking your place."

"But--"

"Nope. Come on, Howard, get your plushy and let's head on over to the next spectacle you got up your sleeves." June said. Without any warning, she started to head further into the carnival, towards the more serious rides and games. Just what had he gotten into?

---

howard slayte

"You can say that, but I know the truth." Howard said as he plucked a Dugtrio plushie from the rack and hugged it tightly. "You're simply jealous of my Dugtrio plushie. It's fine, don't fret. I'm sure that one day you'll reach the rank of Whack-a-Dugtrio Master."

June's shit eating grin was matched by Howard's as the two signed a sacred contract: a grudge match. In this moment, blackmailing was forgotten. Howard would conquer every single game at this Arceusforsaken carnival. At the end, when he sat upon a throne of plushes and June lie in a pile of broken machines, he would be declared the winner.

And she, the loser!

"Come, come. Let's see how good you are at the Tauros-Rodeo." Howard snickered at her as he hugged his plushie tightly to his chest. The two walked towards a mechanized Tauros that seemed to be possessed by every single broken machine June had fixed or ever will fix. It bucked and shook and roared as the person attempting to ride it got flung several feet into a pile of bags.

"You've got this, Master Mechanic." Howard's shit eating grin grew to titanic proportions. "It's just like a motorcycle, right?"

They were both terrible.

---

STAMP GET: Pick a prize from the prize wall at one of the Carnival games!
june sleigh

June didn't consider her and Howard true 'friends' yet. Acquaintances, sure. They had a moment at that shitty café. Hell, the man had pulled through for her in a time of need. That didn't mean nothing to the mechanic.

However, her shit-eating grin slowly faded. She stood silent, toolbox clenched in her hand. As the mechanical Tauros bucked off a kid after three seconds, she let go of the toolbox. It clattered to the ground, a thunderous BOOM to the small crowd that watched. It drew their attention quickly.

"Howard."

She looked him dead in the eyes. A fire burned behind those pupils, a dangerous inferno that threatened to swallow him whole.

"You do realize I ride a Talonflame every day, right?"

With the message sent, she slowly approached the ride and hopped the fence. The next person in line started to complain loudly, but the ride attendant shut them up fast."Let her cook and I'll conveniently forget that you need two tokens for your turn, yea?"

Nothing could hold her back. She cleanly mounted the 'bull' in one swift motion and whipped her fist high above her head. "Let's get this thing in motion, please!"

The operator did. As per usual, the mechanization slowly whirred to life. June took a firm but loose stance, an acceptance that this was not her dance to lead, but she must follow in step. Each whip, a preview of what was to come, didn't even phase the girl. Whichever direction it whipped, she followed along with an iron grip.

Yet the 'honeymoon' phase could only go on for so long. This ride got a reputation through sheer violence and unpredictability, much like the real life counterpart. For June, though, nothing seemed to change. With each violent rock, she was thrown like a sack of potatoes. Even as her legs moved every which way, and even lost their grip, the 'mechanic' held on. A minute passed, then a second. The ride moved in ways no one had even thought possible: seven-twenties, bucks that rivaled cliffs in drop off, and even both combined at the same time.

Only when the operator yelled "THREE" did June finally fall off. Even with the acceptance of defeat, it only happened because she let go of the reigns. Like everyone else, she flew off the mechanical Tauros and slammed into the thick, heavy mats. Where ground and horizon met blurred into one congealed, messy pile of nothing.

Slowly, the girl picked herself up and hobbled back to the guardrail. That shitty smile from before returned in full force. "And if you want, we can come back tomorrow on my day off and you can watch me ride this fucker into the dirt."

June would die before she backed down from a challenge, and she'd make sure Howard learned that.

STAMP GET - Involve or Reference a Tauros-Rodeo Game

---

howard slayte

"Ah, that can't be true, June." Howard chuckled. "If you had a Talonflame, you wouldn't take forever to deliver half of my packages."

A kick to June's pride, admittedly. It wasn't like Howard could claim much more over her, given she could rat him out to the cops any day of the week. That was forgotten for now, in exchange for a contest of competency. It would likely end with both of them passing out. Or dying. Whatever came first. Yet as June marched towards the Tauros with a determined glare, Howard found himself staring open-mouthed.

"Trade ya. Thanks." Howard said as he leaned to another carnival-goer and traded a fistful of tokens for their bag of popcorn. It was a pretty good trade in Howard's book. The coins weren't edible, so they'd last longer. Frankly, he was being generous. Howard muched on the popcorn as June took her place on the Tauros.

Then, the ride started.

Howard watched, entranced at the spectacular train wreck that he was about to witness alongside a live carnival audience. Man, this was just like those game shows that aired at two in the morning in his apartment. Howard munched on another fistful of popcorn. "Do a flip!" He yelled at the mechanized bull, even though he didn't seem too upset. Instead, he was getting totally fooled, tooled, and utterly schooled.

In a twisted sort of way, he respected her commitment.

When June slammed into the mat, he took a step forward, only for June to rise from the mat with another shit-eating grin. Howard's vindictive grin also returned in force. "Yeah, yeah. Can't wait to watch your ass get schooled by that Tauros next time." Howard huffed. It had to be a fluke! Howard knew it was anything but, he couldn't admit that without losing his pride.

"So you rode a bull. Very nice! Very impressive! Watch in awe, my apprentice..." Howard took her by the shoulders and whirled her towards a new game that had multiple rope ladders. People were climbing a small chasm to reach the end, before returning back to the other side. If they fell, they were out.

"As I tackle the Sandcobra Rope Climb! That game is rigged six ways to Sunday."

---

june sleigh

"Everyone knows it's rigged. That's the point."

June shook her head, "But if you think I'm gonna watch you from the sidelines, then think again. Who cares if it's rigged, I'll clear it faster than you ever could."

She had never done this attraction before. However, things had progressed far past considerations such as 'had she ever done it' or 'had Howard ever done it either'. In all honesty, the idea of Howard having to navigate rope bridges and other such things sounded extremely feasible. For Arceus' sake, the man watched Brycen-Man.

But the look in his eyes, and that stupid fucking smile he had on his face, his cocky smugness... rationality went out the window.

"Or are you scared to lose at your own game?"

June extended a hand. A formal declaration of challenge. No more beating around the bush: this had gotten personal.

---

howard slayte