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POSTED ON Sept 25, 2023 23:31:00 GMT

freya morningstar likes this

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[attr="class","lyric"]YOU'LL BE THE RUIN OF ME, WON'T YOU?

[attr="class","textbody"] If there was a single constant in Jayden's life, then it would have been Cillian Quinn.

[break][break] From the moment that he had met the man, from the moment of his eventual heartbreak, to the day that he had learned of Gavin's true name, Jayden had always been able to count on him. Rocket had been able to count on him.

[break][break] And for all intents and purposes, as far as Jayden knew, Gavin was Rocket.

[break][break] Jayden had been too. Used to be. Even though it felt like - these days - he wasn't. His mind frayed at the seems as he sat in that hospital bed, strapped up to machine. His fever had subsided, for now, but the nightmares persisted. Day after day, night after night.

[break][break] It felt terrible.

[break][break] But what had felt more terrible was the memory that played on in his head on repeat. Like a broken record, he thought about the way that Underboss Cillian Quinn had relentlessly called for his arrest, had used his SHADOW HOLD on him and played a part in his demise. It felt like the day he had learned Gavin was Cillian Quinn, but worse. So much worse.

[break][break] 'Admin Cross?' a voice called tentatively from outside. 'You have a visitor.'

[break][break] Frost lashes out in his breath from where Jayden sits at the edge of his hospital bed, ice-cold bandages wrapped around his skin.

[break][break] Once upon a time, he would have felt relief at seeing his chosen brother.

[break][break] Today, he felt as much as he would if Alexei had been resurrected again, chosen to exact out the punishment that declan walsh never got to complete.

[break][break] Their eyes meet, and he flinches.

[break]

[attr="class","oocbox"] Cillian Quinn

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TAG WITH @gavin

POSTED ON Sept 27, 2023 23:40:50 GMT

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He's not able to visit as quickly as he likes. Following declan walsh's orders to his underbosses, Cillian had left the meeting to patrol the city's perimeter. Though duty to Rocket had bound him there, his thoughts had been with Jayden.[break][break]

Now, entering the medical ward to see his brother flinch from him as if he were someone else, it hurts.[break][break]

Cillian lifts his hands slightly, palms up, as if he were trying to pacify a wounded animal. In a sense, that's exactly what Jayden has become. A creature of ice and hatred.[break][break]

But just as he had not been quick to condemn Elisabeth Fiorelli, he clings stubbornly to their past and ignores the cat-shaped elephant that was, thankfully, not present in the room. Instead, his golden gaze traces the bandages. He may not have meant to cause pain with the SHADOW HOLD, but his restraints had made it easier for their more bloodthirsty colleagues to do so.[break][break]

"Hey."[break][break]

He understands Jayden's fears, because he understands Rocket.[break][break]

"I'm not here to hurt you." Cillian has always been softspoken, but there's an added gentleness to the words. He doesn't cross the room to sit at Jayden's bedside; it's clear he understands something has changed. "Wanted to see how you were doing."

[break][break]

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jayden

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POSTED ON Oct 1, 2023 1:01:36 GMT

freya morningstar likes this

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[attr="class","lyric"]YOU'LL BE THE RUIN OF ME, WON'T YOU?

[attr="class","textbody"] The SHADOW HOLD had not hurt him. Not the way that the other attacks had. It was not as severe as bryan delarosa's fist, of mint frost's purple sludge or the relentless barrage of Zev Harcourt and his razor-sharp tendrils.

[break][break] It was painless.

[break][break] And yet, as painless as it was, it was Cillian. Cillian, who had never laid a hand on him. Cillian, who had been the one to pull him out of his father's crushing influence. Cillian, who had been a brother to him in the way Alexei never had.

[break][break] Because it was Cillian, it hurt all that much more.

[break][break] When their eyes meet, ice crystals form along his bare arms. As if reacting to the Harbringer's presence, even without the Lugia's looming gaze.

[break][break] "What do you think?"

[break][break] "How would you feel if you were me?"

[break][break] Violet eyes shift to the color of frosted blue.

[break][break] 'Are you still my brother?'

[attr="class","oocbox"] Cillian Quinn

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the Harbinger

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TAG WITH @gavin

POSTED ON Oct 6, 2023 17:46:02 GMT

freya morningstar, THEO BECKETT, and 1 more like this

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Cillian's guard goes up, focus sharpening on the ice that creeps along his brother's arms. Half-expecting the spiteful snowstorm to form anew, it takes a great deal of willpower not to retreat. Instead, he meets jayden cross's gaze. Unflinching.[break][break]

"I'd be glad you cared enough to stop me doing something I'd regret."[break][break]

Having not been outright dismissed, he steps now further into the room, but still does not sit down in one of the chairs. He seems uncertain what to do with his hands, and his fingers twist together to betray some of his simmering anxiety.[break][break]

"You attacked Rocket, Jayden."[break][break]

THEO BECKETT's words echo through his mind, and he's sure Jayden can hear them just as plainly: You know what happens when you fail. It's why, Cillian thinks, Jayden expects that he is here for punishment rather than comfort.[break][break]

But the underboss has never disguised his claws when they need to come out, and for now they remain sheathed.[break][break]

"Beckett and I did what we could. Elisabeth would've killed you." His lip curls in disgust at his former friend. How could she? "You were a danger to yourself and others. But you're not still, are you?"[break][break]

Though his voice carries the softness of reassurance, there's the lilt of a question at the end.[break][break]

Do you want to hurt us, even now?

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jayden

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POSTED ON Oct 19, 2023 16:17:40 GMT

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[attr="class","lyric"]YOU'LL BE THE RUIN OF ME, WON'T YOU?

[attr="class","textbody"] The steadiness of Cillian Quinn's gaze stills something within him. As if the ice spawning around his arms and within his heart can be seized by that simple gesture.

[break][break] And in that moment, he blinks. 'Thank you' are the words he wants to say but somehow cannot convey.

[break][break] "You attacked Rocket, Jayden."

[break][break] "Wait — I -"

[break][break] Disbelief tears him asunder, making him feel like he's sinking into a wormhole. He leaps up, sheets of ice cascading along the floor the minute his feet hit the floor.

[break][break] 'Attacked?'

[break][break] It is as if Cillian Quinn has flipped a switch that he didn't know was there.

[break][break] "I didn't! I didn't!"

[break][break] Shards of ice and glass spring from his body, eyes shut, as he grips his hair.

[break][break] He crumples to the floor.

[break]

[attr="class","oocbox"] Cillian Quinn

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TAG WITH @gavin

POSTED ON Oct 20, 2023 13:10:55 GMT

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He has never been afraid of Jayden.[break][break]

Yet the powers of an Avatar have turned his brother into something else, and Cillian's miasma swirls around him as he shifts back with inhuman speed, away from the ice that spreads slick across the floor.[break][break]

His is a predator's stance.[break][break]

There is a knife in his hand, warning in his eyes.[break][break]

Yet Jayden doesn't attack, and neither does he. The wariness remains just that, and the knife's blade remains sheathed. For now.[break][break]

"You don't remember?"[break][break]

Cillian hadn't considered that.[break][break]

Shards of ice sting exposed skin, melting against the heat of flesh, but still Cillian does not retaliate. This was not the sort of attack he'd feared. This was the snarling of a caged animal, borne of fear rather than aggression.[break][break]

"You weren't yourself," he affords, generous, "but you did attack us. All those present will surely attest, if you doubt my word."

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jayden

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POSTED ON Oct 20, 2023 16:19:15 GMT

MATIAS SILPH likes this

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[attr="class","lyric"]YOU'LL BE THE RUIN OF ME, WON'T YOU?

[attr="class","textbody"] Jayden was a slave. His entire life, he had been a slave either to Rocket or his father's whims. He had never had any control, any choice. And that had been just fine with him. He had never wanted anything else.

[break][break] But to know that he had no control over his own actions, even the simplest of ones?

[break][break] Rocket was entire life. His family. He would have never - not in any ordinary circumstance - attacked them. But then again, nothing about this was particularly ordinary, was it?

[break][break] The Rocket Admin stayed peeled to the floor, a bluster of ice and snow crystallizing around him as his skin tore with the emotions that suddenly ran through him. His throat tightened inexplicably, hands gripping against the floor. Ice digs into his skin, making his palms bleed.

[break][break] Cillian Quinn had spun away from him, but the admin did not move an inch from where he was. He did not turn to attack him, to act on the feelings warring in his chest. He did not - could not attack him, not when he felt like he was attacking himself.

[break][break] Memories of the night before, where he'd attacked everyone, tore through him. The flash of fierce blue eyes, sword-like teeth, and a dagger of smile. The terrifying image of MATIAS SILPH and Dmitri Volkov towering of him. The HATRED that bled so cleanly, so easily, through him, as if it had been made to be there in the first place.

[break][break] "What's -" he broke, eyes glancing up towards his brother. Crystals of ice stung his neck, crawling towards his cheek. His eyes were blistered white and blue. "What's happening to me, Cil?" he whispered.

[break]

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the Harbinger

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TAG WITH @gavin

POSTED ON Oct 29, 2023 13:09:30 GMT

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Creeping frost threatens to consume Jayden, and Cillian finds himself at a loss on what to do. He could only relate these strange new abilities to the power of an avatar, and if his own were anything to go by, there wasn't anything he could do.[break][break]

Except to be here. To support, in whatever way he could.[break][break]

But he has not, and will never, sugar-coat the truth.[break][break]

"I don't know," Cillian admits, grim. "We all have our suspicions, of course, after what happened to Underboss Fiorelli." Though he uses her title out of habitual respect, there's a hard edge to his tone. She'd tried to command them to kill Jayden. "But I don't know what it means for you."[break][break]

He thinks of prior experimentation performed by M.A.G.M.A. Of what bryan delarosa had done for Chu-e Choi.[break][break]

"Is this something you want?"[break][break]

He lets the implication hang in the air.

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jayden

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POSTED ON Oct 31, 2023 22:14:53 GMT

mint frost likes this

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[attr="class","lyric"]YOU'LL BE THE RUIN OF ME, WON'T YOU?

[attr="class","textbody"] Want?

[break][break] A year ago, or maybe even six months ago, he would have said no. His entire time in Hoenn, it was a thought that constantly persisted through the consciousness of anyone who had eyes enough to see what was going on with their region. After seeing the events of Cyberchase, of searching through textbooks of solutions with oscar clayton, of being helpless in the face of Meteno —

[break][break] 'No.'

[break][break] YES.

[break][break] "I —" he grimaces, tightening his hands into fists at his side. It warred within him, the desire to want and not want. The ambitions that he'd never had as a grunt, the thirst for power that had only recently been splintered into him by forces unknown.

[break][break] Did he want this?

[break][break] He hadn't wanted to be King in Galar. And yet, he had found himself there anyway. He had been thrust into the position, without any warning or willpower, and yet — he had stayed. He had thrived. Without him, Ballonea would have never — would have always —

[break][break] Without Avatarship cursed upon him, who would have it cursed instead? Ashley Shepard? mint frost?

[break][break] Suddenly, he knew he couldn't bear the thought.

[break][break] "I want to want it," he confessed after a moment. Slowly, he stood. Ice no longer crystallized from where he stood, and pale hands reached out for his brother's hands.

[break][break]

[attr="class","oocbox"] Cillian Quinn

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the Harbinger

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TAG WITH @gavin

POSTED ON Nov 6, 2023 6:40:08 GMT

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Jayden steps toward him, and Cillian steps back. He lifts the hands that Jayden reaches for in a bracing gesture, wariness clear in his expression... but there is also an apology. He wants to trust his bonded brother, the way he'd been unable to trust the brother of his blood, but the attack against Rocket's upper echelon is still fresh in his mind.[break][break]

"Why?" he demands, firm but not unkind. "Why do you want it?"[break][break]

A pause, then, "And is it you that wants it, or...?"[break][break]

The grit of his teeth suggests the name he will not speak aloud. Chien-Pao.

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jayden

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POSTED ON Nov 6, 2023 7:24:52 GMT

MATIAS SILPH likes this

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[attr="class","lyric"]YOU'LL BE THE RUIN OF ME, WON'T YOU?

[attr="class","textbody"] The hurt that flashes through his expression is raw and brief. Immediate in it's impulse, as he watches his brother step back from him, wariness clear in his expression.

[break][break] Or was that fear?

[break][break] 'No,' Jayden reasoned. 'Cillian would never be afraid of me.'

[break][break] Not the way that they'd been afraid of both their fathers, their superiors, burdened with feelings that could only be unearthed in the hellfire of Kanto Rocket. This wasn't that, this wasn't —

[break][break] "Isn't it obvious," he breathed, cold billowing around him as his hands clenched into fists. His eyes, desperate, as they flit to his brother. The thing that he'd always resented within himself, the thing that Alexei had never been able to see. "I want to be strong. I want to be powerful. I want —"

[break][break] The thing that made people like MATIAS SILPH not remember who he was.

[break][break] "It's for us. As it's always been."

[break][break] Us. Rocket. Family.

[break][break] Was there any other option?

[break][break] He blinks when Cillian Quinn breaches another topic, hestitation clinging to his voice as it breaks off. But Jayden's response is immediate, secure, despite the absence of his god. Even without it here, there was an inexplicable tie. A bond, now, that could not be broken.

[break][break] Jayden was sure that his brother could feel it too. With his own patron.

[break][break] "We are one and the same."

[break][break] Once again, he reaches. Palm splayed outwards.

[break][break] "But I'm still me."

[break][break] Hadn't fern delaney said that to him - too - once upon a time? That they were Rocket, but more than that, they were them. At the time, Jayden hadn't understood it. But now...

[break][break] There was no other choice.

[break][break] No other fate but this.

[break]

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the Harbinger

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october 28th

circhester, galar

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POSTED ON Nov 11, 2023 13:18:42 GMT

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Cillian shakes his head, sharp.[break][break]

"No, Jayden. It's not."[break][break]

And how could he assume it would be, after they'd both witnessed the change in Underboss Elisabeth Fiorelli? She'd become a different person overnight. There seemed to be little left of the friend he'd admired, sought kinship with.[break][break]

Because of the thing she'd bonded with.[break][break]

And in the cold that floods the room, Cillian is aware of the snow-cat's presence.[break][break]

I'm still me, Jayden insists, and Cillian can only think of Elisabeth gleefully ordering his demise.[break][break]

Yet a bond shattered between brothers of blood leaves him raw, vulnerable, and desperate for the kinship of a family he'd chose. So, against his better judgement that tells him to run, he takes Jayden's hands.[break][break]

They're cold as ice.

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jayden

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POSTED ON Nov 13, 2023 17:41:06 GMT

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[attr="class","lyric"]YOU'LL BE THE RUIN OF ME, WON'T YOU?

[attr="class","textbody"] His hands, like the rest of his body, are as cold as ice.

[break][break] Cillian Quinn would be able to feel the coldness, the frost, but more than that, the pain. The pain that lingered on his skin from where the frost bit into him — the pain that echoed through his whole expression, that had always lingered in his person, but was somehow deeper.

[break][break] Somehow bone-deep.

[break][break] But as his brother's hands covers his, the frost did not spread. It did not reach out to the Harbringer with the malevolence that one might have expected. Actually, it was the opposite. The touch warmed his hands - in more ways than one. Ice crystals turned into mist, and pink hues filled in the paleness of his expression, warmth seeping into him.

[break][break] "Cil?"

[break][break] Those eyes that once flickered blistering white and blue suddenly faded. Back into the bruised violet that his brother would have recognized him as.

[break]

[attr="class","oocbox"] Cillian Quinn

[attr="class","bottom"]

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played by

thorn

the Harbinger

he/him

october 28th

circhester, galar

demisexual

underboss

the harbinger

6'3" height

I want corruption, I think I'm the devil in disguise.

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