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POSTED ON Feb 7, 2024 1:34:47 GMT

BARNABY FINCH and tavish rose like this

BARNABY FINCH was the worst person in Sootopolis.

Everyone from Necrozma's Avatar to Walsh himself paled in comparison to Admin Bee at this precise moment in time. It had all started when Howard walked up to his office and found a sticky note on his door.

'Birdwatching, thanks for picking up the slack!'
xoxo ~Admin Bee

"You've got to be shitting me." Howard clenched the note in his fist, trembling in anger as his single functional eye blazed with anger. He slammed the door open and found an utter mountain of paperwork, envelopes, and recruitment papers to get through. Judging from the note, this was Bee's backlog.

Howard was going to kick him in the shins, next time he saw him.

"Fern. FERN!" Howard's voice rang down the hall.

Several minutes later, the two were sitting in the Charlatan's office. Luckily for Howard, working with Fern was easy. Tapu Koko's chosen was an expert when it came to forgeries, and Howard was a historian who shipped artifacts and other luxuries across the region. The two made loads of cash, together.

"Unbelievable." Howard signed his name on a contract, before putting it into his small pile of completed documents. If Howard accidentally found a fan letter for The Bee's Knees somewhere in this pile, he was throwing himself off the Dyna Tree. "Where do you think he is?"

He looked up at his colleague.

"Besides, y'know, birdwatching."

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long black tulips, born in your blue tints. lemongrass eyelids, smoke in your slick lips.

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POSTED ON Mar 4, 2024 1:19:23 GMT

BARNABY FINCH and howard slayte like this

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Paperwork was never a preferred or enjoyed part of Fern’s daily agenda.[break][break]
Which was why, more often than not, they griped and whined on end until jayden cross took over the bulk of it for them– just for them to preen and fawn over him in turn. And then they could generally do as they pleased for the remainder of the day.[break][break]
They were no good at tedious drudgery unless it was expressly of the fabricated variety.[break][break]
So why, WHY was Jayden–their sweet, beloved, cooperative darling nowhere to be found–leaving them to be roped into not just Howard’s demand for assistance, but a demand that pertained to work that belonged to neither of them??[break][break]
Sullenly, they hoped that wherever BARNABY FINCH was, his tea was dreadfully cold.[break][break]
At least they didn’t mind Howard’s company. Fern’s nose wrinkled in distaste as they leafed their way through what felt like a huge stack of papers, but was actually a tiny portion next to the other admin’s. They snorted quietly, eyes darting over to glance at Howard. [break][break]
“Hell if I know. Having more fun than we are, undoubtedly.” A pause, then a grumble– “I’ve half a mind to sign off on these using a false name.”

[attr="class","tag"] howard slayte[break]

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Admin Fox

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POSTED ON Mar 4, 2024 9:09:51 GMT

Tempest Quinn, Elisabeth Fiorelli, and 1 more like this

"Please don't." The sigh that left his lips contained the suffering of a thousand generations, their untold agony fading with his breath. "It ends up on my desk when you do that. That signature you did in Elisabeth Fiorelli 's name was pretty good, though. You gotta accent the 'l's more."

In order to fake a haughty Kalosian woman's signature, you had to become a haughty Kalosian woman. You had to look at the world around you and utterly ooze derision and scorn. You had to haughtily laugh while throwing decades of beautiful calligraphy training down the toilet.

Alas.

"Not too shabby, though. That painting you faked? The Death of Maractus? Impeccable. I couldn't find a single thing wrong with it."

If Fern was good at anything, it was printing fakes. That, throwing out all of grape-flavored cough syrup on account of the artificial flavoring.

"Hey, so..." Howard's eye flicked to his colleague as he signed off on another order. "Where's your freaky thunder buddy at?"

Fern's Tapu Koko was a war criminal, and Howard half-expected it to turn his signed stack of paperwork into a smoking pile of ash. Assuming it didn't just drop a bookshelf on him and Fern in some fickle thunder god's attempt at 'humor'.

fern delaney

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harper beck

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twenty-nine

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forger

rocket admin

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long black tulips, born in your blue tints. lemongrass eyelids, smoke in your slick lips.

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POSTED ON Mar 16, 2024 3:20:18 GMT

Elisabeth Fiorelli and howard slayte like this

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Howard's exasperation drew a giggle of entertainment from Fern. The sound bright to cut through the doom and gloom hanging in the air of the office. "Then you should refuse to do the work for him," they comment simply. Then, a pause - "So wait, why are we doing these for ol' ComBee?"[break][break]
On Elisabeth Fiorelli's handwriting, their expression fell into a look of contemplation. "Hmm.. yes, I see your point." They gave the impression of doing complex mental math, but they were only picturing the signature in mind. Mentally making those corrections. "I will practice," Fern then declared swiftly, fist falling against the flat of their open palm. "Then I will come to you for critique."[break][break]
Despite pointers, Howard was equally as praising, and Fern was quick to preen. "Why thank you!" I'm deciding what I should do next, in fact. Lady With a Furret? Or - ooh! Numel Descending a Staircase?"[break][break]
They looks to their fellow admin with expectant, eager eyes. (And quite notably, their hand had suspiciously ceased all productivity.)[break][break]
"Hm? Oh...good question. It is somewhere on the sub." A delighted laugh slipped free. "If I had to wager a guess, it's probably trying to scavenge in the canteen." Always a troublemaker - something they'd grown increasingly fond of. "Why do you ask?"

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Admin Fox

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POSTED ON Mar 17, 2024 8:37:34 GMT

Tempest Quinn likes this

"No reason," Howard said casually as his frown deepened. "Just glad that I remembered to lock my office door."

If he went back to see Tapu Koko destroying seven millennia's worth of rare artifacts, historical documents, and other important pieces for the sake of a joke, Howard would seriously consider throwing it into the submarine's engine. Most of the time, Tapu Koko's version of a 'joke' wasn't funny to the admin. It just made him sad.

And angry.

"Practice makes perfect, but practice also breeds repetitiveness. It's easy to get trained into making the same mistake if nobody corrects it." The admin pointed out as he signed another form and put it into a folder. "It's harder to unlearn something than it is to learn a new skill."

Unlearning how to have morals was the hardest task of an empathetic Rocket. It was something that Howard had not yet forgotten, and it was a skill he desperately clung to.

"Do both. I'll get them both sold. Let me know if you need more old paints."

When the subject came to Barnaby, the admin sighed and nudged his colleague to keep working. Fern got distracted too easily. If Howard threw a ball of yarn, Fern would probably chase it.

"We do it because cooperating is important. I'm not gonna drop something that needs to get done, otherwise nobody will do it. If we can't rely on one another to pick up for us when we're busy, the League has already beaten us." The admin chewed on his pen thoughtfully for a moment.

"Plus he scares me."

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long black tulips, born in your blue tints. lemongrass eyelids, smoke in your slick lips.

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POSTED ON May 5, 2024 21:04:58 GMT

howard slayte likes this

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“You think a lock can stop Tapu Koko?” Fern asked in turn, a brow lifting. It couldn’t, of course, as far as they were aware. Though it might grow frustrated for a moment, trying to snap at the doorknob with its pincers. But that didn’t mean Howard knew that.[break][break]
Just a little bit of mischief. For roping them into all this paperwork.[break][break]
Clearly the other admin didn’t share the same penchant for silly amusements, which was a shame. But then again, Fern had their own adjustment period to the guardian’s destructive, curious habits.[break][break]
“Hm, a fair point. Which is why I appreciated the critique.” Their mouth pulled into a thin smile. Then they slumped back in their chair with a beleaguered sigh.[break][break]
“Always working, where is your sense of fun?” Fern paused, “But yes. I need some more phthalo green, please and thank you.”[break][break]
The nudge made them grumble, and they sullenly grabbed at another folder. Peering over the edge of it at Howard, Fern rolled their eyes. “Blah blah League, be on the ball, blah blah. Now that is the real reason.” Their eyes sparkled like a furret that had swiped something particularly shiny, and they pocketed the information for later.[break][break]
“What good does it do you to be scared of your equal? How exactly does one ‘rely on others’ if you’re frightened?” They shrug, and a titter of amused laughter crawled up their throat. “That’s just simple intimidation.”

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Admin Fox

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POSTED ON May 6, 2024 8:15:50 GMT

"Simple, my fraudulent friend."

Papers shuffled as Howard opened a folder and peered at the contents. After a moment, a suppressed chuckle escaped his throat as he gave Fern a side-eyed glance. "By pretending. I'm just upholding the status quo. Nobody wants a cowardly admin."

Pretend and lie. Lie and deceive. That was the only way to survive in an organization that demanded the world from him. Howard would not be betrayed by Fern, Jayden, or Barnaby. Thus, he would give them what they expected: an admin way in over his head.

"We're equal in name only. You three vastly outstrip me where it matters, and I'm here to prop you three up." They were strong trainers with impeccable powers who had been members of Rocket for a very long time. In exchange, Howard was a very recent promotion. He lacked weight and experience, but inexperience could fade.

Howard looked up at Fern.

"Is that not what we do? Lie? Pretend? What good does it do to not respect the hierarchy? What good does it do to not be afraid?"

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long black tulips, born in your blue tints. lemongrass eyelids, smoke in your slick lips.

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