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POSTED ON Jun 9, 2024 6:01:27 GMT

illeana reyes likes this

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it used to be kanto that haunted him.[break][break]

those were simpler times; waking up covered in sweat in some random slateport hotel next to illeana reyes, likely terrifying her with the state he was in only to try and fall back asleep with his head muddy with guilt and grime; he misses it.[break][break]

now, his terrors come in different shapes and forms. tonight's affliction brings him back to mount chimney, to muted flashes of fear, betrayal, and sacrifice. kyle lopez's screams are the last thing he remembers before he awakes.[break][break]

annalise henderson isn't even registered.[break][break]

he stumbles out of bed, across the room, and out onto the balcony where he almost collapses over the railing. there, he trembles, breathing air that doesn't feel as fresh as it normally does.[break][break]

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POSTED ON Jun 9, 2024 7:02:55 GMT

MATIAS SILPH likes this

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in the days trailing after, hypervigilance remains written behind her eyelids. the suggestion of movement, the sigh of the house settling — everything rouses her out of sleep. she teaches herself not to startle in the haze of half-consciousness, one hand lazily reaching out to graze against him, to remind herself that she's still in hoenn. [break][break]the bed shifts, jarring her awake, then hasty footsteps retreat away. annalise remains still, her arm drawn over her eyes. then, slowly, she removes her arm, blinking blearily as she falls into routine: her hand reaches out, palm settling first on the blanket and then on the pillow. [break][break]no matias.[break][break]he left me. [break][break]annalise snaps upright, sore muscles screaming in protest, and confirms the anxious thought by scrutinizing the dark. she swings her legs over the side of the bed and gets up in search of him, but just standing up is enough. her anxiety peters out as she approaches the open balcony door, drawn toward the moonlight and the silhouette clinging to the railing outside.[break][break]
she stops at the threshold, one hand raised to rub her eye. [break][break]"matias?"[break][break]she drops her hand and blinks away sleep. he's shaking, she realizes, and concern bleeds into her expression. [break][break]"are you okay?"

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matias

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TAG WITH @matias

POSTED ON Jun 10, 2024 4:57:23 GMT

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whispers that somehow manage to reverberate the earth sound in his head, growing louder with each inflection that rises and falls. they echo with intensity, his own words repeated back to him: 'it's over,' followed by: 'we've lost.'[break][break]

it's almost enough to drown him.[break][break]

"stop."[break][break]

but when her voice calls out to him, instead of hiding behind walls of earth, he reaches out for her arm, accepting the help she might not even be aware she's offering.[break][break]

"sorry."[break][break]

he tugs her closer, his gaze shifting back out to the view of the mountains.[break][break]

"i have these—" nightmares. but admitting as much would mean admitting yet another weakness of his, and he's sick of it. "—it's just hard sometimes."[break][break]

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POSTED ON Jun 10, 2024 8:13:32 GMT

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stop.[break][break]the command keeps her in the doorway, though she quickly realizes — as sleep evaporates at the sight of his trembling — that it isn't meant for her. she ventures a question, unsure if he realizes she's here, and stills as he turns back to look at her. their eyes meet and he reaches for her arm, lucid and apologetic. she feels a pang of pity. [break][break]"it's okay," she says softly, a means of dismissing his apology and comforting him. [break][break]he pulls her out into the night air and admits his vulnerability to distant mountains, but she doesn't follow her gaze across his property. instead, she lifts her chin to look up into his face, brows furrowed sympathetically. the same irritating way people look at her, reflected in her own expression. [break][break]"it's really hard sometimes," she agrees, tentatively reaching out to rest a hand on his back. it's a testing of waters. "do you... want to talk about it?"

[attr="class","nametag"] MATIAS SILPH

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TAG WITH @matias

POSTED ON Jun 11, 2024 6:35:43 GMT

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it's the same irritating way he's looked at her before, he realizes, and it frustrates him to be on the receiving end of pity, though it has nothing to do with her and everything to do with his insecurities.[break][break]

the slight tremble to his body stills underneath her touch. it calms him, placating worries, anxieties, and fears enough to fill some semblance of clarity into him.[break][break]

he takes a moment to breathe, hesitating.[break][break]

"will you think less of me?"[break][break]

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anna

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POSTED ON Jun 11, 2024 7:04:01 GMT

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matias doesn't spurn the touch of her hand on his back like she might've if she had been in his place. the trembling stops, the nightmare seemingly ends, and the silence that fills the night air stretches with his steadying breaths. his hesitation feels like a no, but he eventually answers her question with a question of his own. [break][break]her first thought is: that's a dumb question. she's thought less of him before for far more egregious things, but being vulnerable with her seems trivial at worst. at the heels of her first thought comes her second:[break][break]"no. i won't." she leans into him, slow, like he might still bite. she wraps her arms around him and asks, "why do you think i'll think less of you?"

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matias

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POSTED ON Jun 11, 2024 7:23:34 GMT

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"because i'm meant to keep you safe, and i can't do that if i'm weak."[break][break]

but as he voices those words out loud for the first time in a while, perhaps ever, he realizes it's silly and baseless. what happened at mount chimney was the epitome of weakness; it is also the foundation which he now has to build upon to become the man he once was.[break][break]

no, the man he wants to become.[break][break]

breathing a sigh, he leans into her, voicing another thought.[break][break]

"aren't you with me because i'm strong?"[break][break]

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POSTED ON Jun 11, 2024 8:08:31 GMT

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annalise frowns. [break][break]"everyone has their moments, matias. you're still human at the end of the day."[break][break]and yet she remembers his humanity disappointed her worst of all. confined to that hospital bed, covered in beeping equipment, fallible and flesh-and-bone as any man she has ever met. the thought comes and goes as he leans in, treacherous and quickly sequestered away.[break][break]"you think it's because you're strong?" she tilts her head, brows furrowed in confusion. she puts up a good act for a beat, but it comes undone into something playful once she follows up with "i'm with you because you're weird. i thought that was pretty obvious already."

[attr="class","nametag"] MATIAS SILPH

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matias

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POSTED ON Jun 12, 2024 8:28:34 GMT

Elisabeth Fiorelli likes this

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he knows she means it playfully but it can't only be because he's weird because there are others far weirder. in fact, the only thing weird about him are the stances he often takes that place him on the opposing side, but he only does that because he thrives off conflict.[break][break]

after a chuckle, he plays along for a moment.[break][break]

"have you ever stopped to consider that maybe it's me who's normal and that it's everyone else that's weird? think about it for a sec."[break][break]

then after a pause comes the truth.[break][break]

"i guess i'm afraid you'll grow to hate me the more you know me."[break][break]

what if he isn't the man she thinks he is? she doesn't even know about Elisabeth Fiorelli nor the events that led up to primeval. he knows, deep down, that she wouldn't be able to accept him.[break][break]

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anna

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TAG WITH @annalise

POSTED ON Jun 12, 2024 20:06:09 GMT

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"even if you are the normal one, you're weird to everyone else."[break][break]annalise wants to hold onto this lighthearted moment, onto this little detour from whatever hard conversation is weighing on his mind, but it slips through her fingers. the mood shifts, chilling the night air, as he bares his insecurities. her face falls. [break][break]what did you do? [break][break]"is that what you had a nightmare about?"[break][break]he didn't say he had one, but she knows that's why he's out here. [break][break]"me ... hating you?"[break][break]she averts her gaze as she asks, looking out across the dark shape of his property. she's afraid, too — afraid of the answers she might find if she stares into his eyes long enough.

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matias

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thirty-two

november 14th

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1321 height

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TAG WITH @matias

POSTED ON Jun 13, 2024 4:21:16 GMT

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"no, but i've had those before."[break][break]

they usually don't end with him scrambling onto the balcony unable to catch his breath or to still his anxieties (he has none). those are less damning, though only because he knows they aren't real.[break][break]

"i killed him, you know."[break][break]

he breathes, reliving the scene over and over again.[break][break]

"it wasn't the sacred fire, it was my earth spike. i remember flicking my wrist, i don't remember the impact, but i remember holding him while he bled out in my arms."[break][break]

his gaze dares not find her.[break][break]

"it was me."[break][break]

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anna

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TAG WITH @annalise

POSTED ON Jun 13, 2024 6:53:22 GMT

ollie morales likes this

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her eyes snap back towards him. he's looking away, sparing himself from the sight of the color draining from her face. but her shock can be felt, if not seen — she leans away subconsciously, her grasp on him unravels. the sound of her step backwards is swallowed up by dark ambience.[break][break]"you — what?"[break][break] her voice rises, small and confused. he keeps going, describing how he did it, but she's still stuck on the confession itself. she remembers meeting kyle lopez in the interdream mist — he had been looking for matias. they were friends. [break][break]"did you — " [break][break]she stumbles over her words. [break][break]"was it ... it was an accident, wasn't it? you were corrupted."

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matias

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thirty-two

november 14th

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POSTED ON Jun 13, 2024 7:04:14 GMT

[nospaces]

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they were more than friends, but that's beside the point. her confusion is instantly mirrored through the pinch of his brows. he looks at her, startled at the veiled accusation behind her question.[break][break]

"what? of course it was an accident. how could you even ask me that?"[break][break]

he doesn't even feel her stepping away before he does so himself, though there's only so far he can go with his back against the railing. if she had it her way, he'd be flung off it, no doubt.[break][break]

"is that what you really think of me?"[break][break]

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POSTED ON Jun 14, 2024 2:01:44 GMT

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"no!"[break][break]the accusation squeaks an answer out of her, quick and defensive. [break][break]"i didn't mean it like that, matias. you made it sound like ... " [break][break]like he had done it on purpose, but the explanation dies on her tongue. it won't make it better, she thinks, to say it now. she already hurt him, already made him press himself against the railing to keep his distance from her. she doesn't want to argue. she doesn't want to be left alone.[break][break]"i'm sorry."[break][break]she regains lost ground, easing herself closer. her hand stretches out for his, measuring how affronted he feels by how far he lets her go. [break][break]"and i'm sorry for what happened on mt. chimney."

[attr="class","nametag"] MATIAS SILPH

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played by

noodles

matias

he/him

thirty-two

november 14th

saffron

straight...unless?

elite four

champion

1321 height

i'll try to find you in mountains made of ash and clouds of smoke.

awards

8,459 posts

DOLLARS

part of

TAG WITH @matias

POSTED ON Jun 14, 2024 4:20:31 GMT

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like he had done it on purpose? maybe. but to even think him capable of doing such a thing is reason enough for his sudden distancing that leaves her wanting, evident by her stretched hand.[break][break]

it's hard not to accept her when what follows feels so grounding, her touch a tether, her presence a haven.[break][break]

"it's fine."[break][break]

he breathes a sigh as his fingers intertwine with hers.[break][break]

"it'll be a while before the sun comes up. you should go back to sleep."[break][break]