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i used to dream in the dark of palisades park

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freya morningstar
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POSTED ON Jan 19, 2021 21:15:46 GMT
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[attr="class","freypost"]the street is chilly and her breath curls the few moments that it takes them to walk from the wake to fernando's waiting car. she slides onto black leather seats, wrapped suddenly in the warmth of a meticulously heated interior. when his door closes, she shrugs off her jacket and folds it over her black-laced knees. 

"when i figure that out, you'll be the first to know." 

she rubs her knuckles. her fair skin is still pink from the cold. he poses his question and the cabin remains quiet. the tires roll beneath them. 

"stone personally took charge of the estate in mine and the morningstar seniors' absence. to my knowledge, his leadership was a personal matter--devon shouldn't have any claim to it. i'll return there and train," she says. 

"and i'll wait." until you call. where else is there to go? 




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silph
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POSTED ON Jan 26, 2021 23:42:49 GMT
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[attr="class","spiral"] "..."

Fernando has no words for her. Anything without purpose feels aimless. Awkward.

The fun fact about Stone's involvement, personal involvement, into Morningstar business is of no concern. Interesting, admittedly, but Fernando is not here to become a mirror image of the man he despises. The copycat only goes one way. He is here for Freya and her alone. Everything else is secondary and will be addresses as needed—he could care less about the insignificant.

She is given a respite to return to her isolation. Whether she uses it wisely or simply regresses into wasting away, he cares not. She is but a piece on the board that encompasses the whole region. Fernando does not concern himself with singular pieces.

Until he needs her.

His Type:Null, Silvy now, proves too much a liability. Having turned on him in the heat of the moment, the Pokemon deserves nothing less than being put down. Only its unique genetic makeup and species pardon's its crime. That alone is why Fernando allows it to continue drawing breath.

It must be trained. Reeducated so that this may never happen again. What he needs is a villain to help mold its aggression and hatred into a bond that breaks through the Pokemon's innate personality.

What he needs is Freya.



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POSTED ON Jan 27, 2021 0:05:58 GMT
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[attr="class","freypost"]her fingers twist in her lap, muscles harkening back to years ago, with strings thwacking in her hair, snapping under her pulls. her arms are thinner, having lost much of their weight from her archery practices, but a couple weeks of rigorous work should be more than enough to shake off her rust. 

the car rolls quietly. the space seems to get smaller with every moment. her head is clear and she ponders what she may have thought were she other than the who she is now; emma. she'd be wrapped up in her, distracted. 

funny, that thinking of her still hurts, but that she can will it away so quickly. 

her fingers twitch again and she sidles closer to fernando. her head rests against his shoulder, knees knocked against his. she looks sideways and reaches to right his slightly mussed tie. 

"when will it come?" she asks. "this...whatever it is, that you want me for?" when will we be able to finish this? when can it stop? 




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silph
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POSTED ON Jan 28, 2021 13:31:23 GMT
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[attr="class","spiral"] "..."

Freya brings him freedom.

How he reads her is indomitably wrong. He keeps his assumptions low but with subject matter that he doesn't keep on top of, the man is left to make conjectures where experience lacks.

Her time away, the solitude, allowing Stone to mold her, for better or worse; the year has not been kind of Freya. Even in his own position, her sudden absence, strangulated by a single instance of pleading with him, he can only interpret it as nothing short of self-loathing. Despair wins and she gives up.

If she has nothing to live for then why should he care about how she feels? About what she thinks?

If her life is disposable then he shall treat her as such.

And in embracing the core tenet that make Fernando a Silph, there is freedom.

There is a cold glimmer in the way his eyes narrow in. They lack the sympathy should blossom from her touch. The warmth that comes from having an abled body next to him, the tugging feeling of his heart strings as she addresses him in both form and name, means little when he no longer has to fake concern.

"It already has."

A man of riddles never provides a satisfactory answer.

When can it stop?

When you give up. When the fire dies from your eyes.

When I no longer have a use for you.



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POSTED ON Feb 3, 2021 2:02:51 GMT
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[attr="class","freypost"]rest has never come easy. she thought it because of her anxieties, the menial trivialities of life weighing her down as responsibilities piled around her. now, she has come to terms with her courtship of the moon, of the waning hours spent in a solitary eve rippling into a morn. 

or perhaps it's because the wicked aren't granted the luxury of sleep. 

there is a comfort in the cold calculation that is the man beside her. though she cannot scrutinize his finer intentions, he has made his desires quite clear. it gives her some solace, some glimmer of hope, that she might be useful yet. 

"then we shall dine to the enviable future," she says and sighs into him. her fingers stay by his collar. "tell me--what is it that keeps you fighting? is it for the people? for silph?" she tilts her head, lips just under his chin, eyes wide with genuine curiosity. "or is it for someone?"




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silph
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POSTED ON Feb 3, 2021 12:38:56 GMT
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[attr="class","spiral"]“Indeed.

The cut of her question sours the taste of the food. Blood spills from the rare cooked meat and it pools, resting. Fernando considers, for the faintest moment, on whether or not to indulge her. For someone so well kept it becomes increasingly alarming when others doubt his intentions. There’s no reason to, from his perspective, and it makes him reconsider how much he truly understands them.

Freya is an exception.

To him, she is no longer a person. He no longer has to worry about her opinion or her stake in the grand scheme of things. Her spirit meanders what is left of her husk, once brilliant with the unbridled ambition of a woman scorned.

Sometimes, he wonders if she is no different than the spirits that bend to Tapu Fini’s will.

That freedom, that lack of concern or fear, opens him up like a tome lost to time.

I fight—” he pauses, as if contemplating. The answer comes from the heart but giving himself to her is fraught with hesitance. “—for myself.

And in it, the world. Being born into wealth, power, and influence means nothing when it’s reduced to nothing.” A hand wraps around her hips, struggling against the self imposed restraint that warns him not to reel her in. He wants her close, as if to whisper a secret no one else is ever meant to hear. “My aspirations aren’t so lofty to be anything more than what I am now. If I could, I would retire from it all and waste my life away in years of decadence.

Selfish.

Truly, truly selfish.

Which means one thing: “But I cannot have that cut short. So I fight to make sure the world is orderly. When it stabilizes, when I can cut myself off without worry of it imploding on itself, I shall rest. But until I know it will last, I will continue to fight for the sake of my tomorrow.





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POSTED ON Feb 3, 2021 22:14:53 GMT
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[attr="class","freypost"]she is startled by his honesty. she withdraws as though recoiling from a snake; the one curled against her breast flexes instinctively at her anxiety. her reaction does not go unnoticed by the man beside her, but he continues his monologue nonetheless.

though others might scathe him for his reasonings, she envies him--at the end of the day, all anyone is fighting for is their own tomorrow. and to be brutally honest with oneself's desires, to hunger for them so stoutly, so tenaciously, is admirable, at the very least. 

she does not wish to respect him, though she does. 

can she want as he does? can she stretch her mind to see the after? her fingers are back in her lap and they tremble, and so she curls them into fists, looking out the other window, away from his calculating gaze--one that can read her like an open book.

the car rolls to a stop and one of rustboro's premier restaurants (hardly worth mentioning compared to the establishments nurtured in mauville and ever grande) waits for them.

"does it make you stronger, then? having something hanging in the balance?" she rounds her gaze back on him, lips pursed. 




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silph
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POSTED ON Feb 4, 2021 20:25:04 GMT
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[attr="class","spiral"]"No."

He lets the answer simmer as his hands flirt with the door handle. The mechanisms of the car lurch open with a solid clunk that proves both satisfying and a segue into further explanation.

"Strength derived from others, from something that can be tarnished or taken away, is like inspiration or muse. It can encourage, spur others to greatness, but prove just as fleeting. Consistency is what makes me 'strong'."

The way his own usage of the word 'strong' comes with a twinge that belies just how introspective Fernando views himself. To him, his strength is there, realized behind the validation from others as well as his own acknowledgement. But the gap between him and others is not one of talent or merit. It is from their own incompetences.

"I am strong because I strive to become stronger—to be better than yesterday, to be the best version of me. I am strong because I do it for myself."

He is not some God King who conquers because he is built different.

The rest of them just lack principle and discipline.

And that bastardized view on the world, on those he surrounds himself with, is why he both hates them and reeks mistrust.

Despite knowing Freya, or at least inferring his actions from what he knows, Fernando still combs through the gesture of meeting her at her door to prostate it open for her. Undoubtedly, such a menial, demeaning courtesy means nothing to someone so proud and powerful, but old habits die hard. The grooming of 'proper' etiquette is as entrenched as his world views.





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POSTED ON Feb 22, 2021 20:53:16 GMT
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[attr="class","freypost"]back then, she was foolish enough to think that having something to fight for could make her invincible. that her passion, and her fury, and her love could triumph over all. but she'd been fed stories and fantasies all her life, and to be splashed, drenched in a reality that proves otherwise, well, her demeanor speaks for itself. 

but why? why still fight? the question burns on her tongue, but he has opened the door and started up the short walk to the restaurant. 

moxie slithers safely back around her neck and she strokes her scaly head as she exits. her lips quirk as fernando opens the door for her. 

someone on his end must have called ahead because the host greets them without surprise and escorts them to a table at the far end of the room, settled neatly against bay windows. the sun sinks lower in the sky, casting an orange glow on the white tablecloth and cream-colored napkins. 

she takes a seat before he can offer to pull her chair out for her. "you'd have made a good motivational speaker, you know," she says. "if you were a simpler man."




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silph
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POSTED ON Feb 25, 2021 12:12:38 GMT
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[attr="class","spiral"]“I am a simple man.

Such a plain-faced lie couldn’t be farther from the truth if he tried. But, deep down, Fernando truly believes that. His own ideology is deep rooted in the lacking aspects of those around him. Although others hold him to a higher standard, even revere him, in some regards, he still holds himself accountable as being the baseline. Nothing he does is extraordinary because he can simplify it down to basic steps.

Privileges, while acknowledged, grants him a luxury that taints his view of the lower class. They’re so filled with trivialities that he can hardly see eye-to-eye with them. That’s where his fascination with other powerful players come from. It’s what her little display back at the concession did to spark his interest.

Eyes deviate from the wine menu to the main menu laid out dutifully in front of them. It’s sectioned into three folds, each one going over a set of select course meals that cover what the kitchen has for today’s unique selection. Rather than take the opulent route of whatever proves most expensive or grand through description, Fernando opts for the specialty, asking for a personal recommendation to help guide his decision. No matter what he picks, he has no doubt it will be delightful, so any mind given to making a choice will be inconsequential and therefore a waste.

He looks to her.

And what would you be, if you were a simpler woman?



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POSTED ON Mar 9, 2021 3:34:06 GMT
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[attr="class","freypost"]where would simple had started for her? before she was steadfast and headstrong? she'd have had to come mewling into the world under better circumstance, held longer than mere moments before life went sideways. 

still, she'd fantasized before about her simple life. even emma hadn't been privy to her fantasies--after all, there's no use dwelling on once-wases/what could have beens. 

she humors him, though only because she makes him laugh with his own titular oxymoron. "i'd be champion," she says. "i'd take the title with ease and then i'd retire with my dragons somewhere in the countryside." she shrugs. 

"i never cared much for the fame or the responsibilities. i just liked the idea of winning." she rolls her tongue and orders the sirloin when the waitress comes around, alongside a bottle of the red that it's been paired with. 

she comes back shortly with two bordeaux glasses in hand. once freya approves of the taste, she gestures for her to pour for her partner as well. 

the dark red liquid settles in their glasses and freya brings hers to her lips. "it just happened that the council seat opened before i could get serious about it," she says. she pauses, blinks, and then laughs.

"i don't even know who has a seat anymore."




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silph
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POSTED ON Mar 15, 2021 4:30:10 GMT
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[attr="class","spiral"]Champion.

How quaint.

Such lofty goals seem to be the final destination of all trainer—no exceptions. In this case, he considers himself a cut against the grain, a man dead set on reaching the top but never quite grabbing hold. Beyond the title of Champion, where else is there to climb?

Self-improvement is eternal.

And that’s why someone else sits in that seat. “Kyle Lopez,” he answers, smiling in brevity. “A simple man by all means, but certainly strong.

His glass sits, filled but never touched, a vice that waits for dinner to be served before partaking himself. “Do you think such a thing will ever be possible. Retirement—a quietness in the countryside, untouched?



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POSTED ON Mar 26, 2021 1:07:28 GMT
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[attr="class","freypost"]all she remembers of the man are a few accolades and a love of dogs. community outreached used to fall under the umbrella of her duties, but the file that had once stored itself in her mind is weathered, with pages burned ashen, left forgotten for far too long. 

her smile leaves her face and she looks past him, past his warped face through the side of her wine glass. the image is grainy and blurry, like out of some old-timey movie. it only could have existed in her past. 

"no," she says. "but i ask that when this is all said and done, when our fight is over, that is where you leave me." her lips tilt. to discuss her elegy--how vain of her.

"how privileged we are here. we bring so much meaning to this region, to this world. and we fight for them. so what? they might know our names and bring flowers to our graves?" she sighs. "i was so small-minded then." 

she takes another sip of wine. 




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silph
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POSTED ON Mar 27, 2021 3:13:52 GMT
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[attr="class","spiral"]“Freya.

A ghost escapes his lips.

It’s how he should’ve recanted Stone’s name. How he should have handled the procession if they were truly friends. But they weren’t. And neither are him and Freya.

He values her for her fortitude. Someone so strong that seeing her spitefulness well up behind her ambition allows him to keep his own pillar sturdy. She had been something else back then.

Commendable.

This is never done.” The fight is eternal. Betterment of the self is a pursuit that lasts a lifetime. Even when his body is feeble and frail, Fernando will steady what’s left of his mind. Until it ends.

What will be done is you.” Only in death will they be freed from the neverending battle. But he can let her go with that. He’ll respect her wish; bury her in the countryside. “When you lack the will to fight, you may go.

A fork punctures the fibers of his steak. Oil and juice spurts from the wound, only slightly, but enough to show just how succulent the meat is. “But you still have it.” Unlike her, the meat shows no protest when he cuts into it. It separates like butter, clean, perfect, divided at the guidance of his fingers.

We do what we do for ourselves. Even under noble causes, it’s still for ourselves.” He pauses, picking the piece up to his mouth. “And if you don’t then it would do well to remind you that you should.

He savors the taste of self-satisfaction.



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POSTED ON Apr 1, 2021 0:05:34 GMT
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[attr="class","freypost"]this is never done. it would seem that even death, she will not be absolved. would her spirit rest peacefully? or will the twisting thorns inside her burst from her carcass, incarnate into something new, something more less.

she swallows another sip of wine to wash the fantasy now. let her believe that sunflowers will grow upon her grave, that some good might come from her passing.

unlike stone. his only paves the way for more tragedy. 

"maybe i'll try it then," she says. "fight for myself." at first it had been for emma, and then her parents, and then her region, and emma again. when had she ever fought for herself?  the upstanding soldier could never be so selfish. 

nothing holds her back now. 

"i don't mean to incense you. i've no will to retire. i thought we were discussing daydreams." 

the wine has spread through her mind like a fog (after so long removed from such luxury, how could it not?). she savors her first bite of the meal and decides to try out being selfish. 

"how much can i ask of you?"




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