[attr="class","thadmain"]“Hey,” Kepler says, ducking so he’s in the full line of Ash’s view. “Don’t sweat it.” He can feel him shaking. “It’s nothing I haven’t done before.”

He strokes the backs of Ash’s knuckles as they sit there and wait for the nurse. “So, the ECG is measuring the electrical signals of my heart. They put little nodes on my chest connected to wires that trace them in waves. The blood panel is just a blood sample, checking my organ function, no biggie. And the ultrasound is, like, um. The thing they use to look at babies? Except they’re looking at my heart.” He lifts his hand and wiggles his fingers. “It’s kind of cool to watch the valves all move and work. You can come with me, if you want.”

He pulls Ash’s hand closer and lays it flat against his chest, over his heart-- his thrice-damned heart-- so his boyfriend can feel it. Beating, normal, healthy.

“It’s like… it’s like when you go off and do dangerous things with Isaac Merlo and Cillian Quinn and. All those people. You’re good at it and you know what you’re doing.” He laughs, then, and it’s a little sardonic, but a lot hopeful. “I’m… well, I can’t say that I’m good at receiving treatment for cardiologic events, but… I’m experienced at it and I know what I’m doing.”

Ash’s next point makes him laugh again, for real, this time, and he loses himself in it, leaning forward and pressing his forehead against Ash’s shoulder. “Yeah, yeah it does. Sorry.”

[attr="class","thadpoke"]

[attr="class","mitchelpoke"]

[attr="class","samknox2"]

[attr="class","thadmain"]He’d spent his entire life gremlining in the dark, hiding in his room, ostracized to the fringes of society; his developmental years had been spent amongst people as smart and nerdy as he was, if not moreso, and decidedly hellbent on proving their superiority. These were elements that did not lead to a fun time.

But Ash not only indulged in his weird nerdiness, he supported it, without the need to assert his dominance or shit all over him for it. It was… a strange sort of relief, like the final piece of a million-part puzzle sliding into its perfect slot, to finally find someone like that. Kepler’d been gripping onto his forever aloneness for so long that his fingers ached. Ash soothed that pain.

Also, he was very, very hot. Sexy in a way that made Kepler stupid. Which was not an easy thing to do.

“That checks out,” Kepler said, of their mutual friend Isaac Merlo and his weird Jack-Of-All-Trades ability to be fucking great at everything he puts his mind to. “Isaac succeeds at everything he puts his mind to. I think he’d break the entire field of research and development if he ever went scientific."

He’s got a fat ol’ strawberry halfway to his mouth when Ash proclaims his lifting weight and Kepler’s brain does a full system reboot.

“That… is almost more than I weigh,” he says, in a half-strangled voice that signifies he is desperately trying to keep his mind on track and not in the gutter. It is so, so very hard to not climb his boyfriend like a goddamn tree at every waking moment.

He shakes his head to clear it and sags back against the counter.

“It’s perfect. Thank you.” It was a whole lot to dedicate an entire room of your rented space to your significant other’s job. “It’s really nice to not have to… go anywhere,” he added, lamely, turning back to the counter to finish trimming the strawberries. “What’s next, after they’re all cut?”

[attr="class","thadpoke"]

[attr="class","thadmain"]Ash continues to hold onto him for dear life, gripping in a way that’s going to leave bruises. Kepler doesn’t mind. It’s the only time he’s ever been anything other than bitter about his frail skin that mottles so easily: when Ash leaves his marks on him, a memory that Kepler’s been claimed, is loved. Something he can visit when they’re apart, as a reminder.

When Ash speaks, Kepler flashes him a warning look, and gently puts a hand over the one that’s gripping him so tight. He desperately hopes Ash gets the message; they can’t tell the doctor what actually happened. She’ll have them fucking committed.

“I’m in Hoenn doing research work for Alamaos U-- out of Sinnoh, you know. Weather patterns, the physics of pressure systems. That sort of thing.” His tone is conversational, laying down backstory that’s tied enough into realism and truth to be believable. “I’m a scientist. One of my assignments is to track the effect of… abnormalities on environmental patterns. Obviously, the rift is an abnormality. In more ways than one.”

He let his words hang heavy so the doctor could gather the gist of them.

“I… got too close. The exposure was too much and, you know. Boom. Heart episode.” He finished with a shrug, patting Ash’s hand. His feet, still in stockings, swung off the bed in the empty air.

It had always worked with doctors in his childhood. They always questioned him about his episodes and never seemed to care that they happened because he was being tormented and abused. Just that they were triggered by fear.

The doctor nods and makes a note on her chart.

“I’m going to order a full blood panel and an ECG. Make sure you’re not throwing weird rhythms. I’d like to schedule you for an ultrasound as well to monitor your valve activity.” She tucked the tablet pen into the holder on the iPad case and looked through her glasses at him. “In the meantime, I’m prescribing you Alprazolam and putting you on strict bed rest. No stressful activities for a minimum of 90 days.”

Kepler slouches in his seat as she stands up and excuses herself from the room.

“See?” he says, bringing Ash’s fingers to his lips in the silence that follows. “Not too bad. We’re almost done.”

[attr="class","thadpoke"]

[attr="class","thadmain"]Kepler followed the path down to the quote-unquote public entrance of the Tree of Life.

Steps had been carved into the steep, and he had to be mindful of the moss that grew over them. It caught the wet Sootopolis sea wind and made the path slippery and treacherous.

Pluto hovered behind him, a lifeguard in case he should trip and plummet to his death.

It was like walking into a different world. Space opened up around him, filled with mist and subterranean canopies. Kepler swallowed, staring into the expanse.

“I’ve never actually been down here,” he confessed, torn between looking at the wonder of everything and focusing on where he was putting his boots. “It’s kind of fucking incredible?”

They were following the trail of a Rocket unit that had gone missing on routine patrol in this first section of the Tree which was accessible to the organization. Kepler was fresh off his three-month healing period and determined to not be a fucking wet blanket anymore. He was sort of amazed Temp had agreed to go with him, feeling certain the larger man would have demanded someone more capable.

Temp was good people, actually, Kepler had come to believe.

[attr="class","thadpoke"]

[attr="class","thadmain"]Despite himself the mention of Beast Wars had his little hands clapping. “Oh, it’s so bad it’s good. I’m so excited.”

It heartened him to hear that Ash was busy coming up with ways they could spend time together outside of their… well, their normal, which was, you know, sex. Sex and crime. Crime and sex. They couldn’t do either of those things together, for the moment. The attempted possession in the Borderlands and Kepler’s ensuing heart event to ensure he didn’t end up hurting the person he loved had left a lasting mark, from which he was still healing.

He catches the second pink apron in hand and unbundles it, looping it over his neck and tying it around his waist. He has to tie it a lot because he is literally so small.

“Got it.” He’d done experiments in the lab with highly acidic chemicals and open flames. He could cut the tops off some strawberries. But Ash was right in his worries because, for all his intelligence, coordination was not Kepler’s strong suit.

He pops open the plastic tub of fruit and grabs a cutting board from a rack, finding a small-ish knife that would do the least damage should something atrocious happen. Beginning with the largest strawberry, he begins to decapitate them.

“How’s your day been?”

[attr="class","thadpoke"]

[attr="class","thadmain"]“Of course I picked you. I couldn’t have picked anyone other than you. What’s important is that you picked me.” Ash is the first person that seemed to have genuinely liked him-- for all his sass and smallness and skinniness, his brains and his relative social inexperience. The only person who took a look at the whole picture and found it more than tolerable for the sake of an assignment grade.

Kepler folds his face into Ash’s chest and is drunk enough to not care that he’s just actively breathing in the smell and feel and warmth and presence of his boyfriend. This is what he wants to do, right now and forever.

The world seemed very large and very expecting right then. For a person who never saw themselves being in a relationship with someone, the idea of getting married and being a quote-unquote adult was somewhat scary.

What was scarier was the idea that Ash would pick someone else to do it with, though.

But then they’re kissing and marriage and kids and the future beyond the next two hours is a teal-colored smudge in the back of his brain.

“Wanna go back to my place, hot stuff?” he manages, around half-pants and Ash’s tongue in his mouth. It’s his attempt at a joke, because his place is also Ash’s place, and it’s not very good but he’s drunk enough to laugh at it.

[attr="class","thadpoke"]

[attr="class","thadmain"]Ashley is gripping his like his life depends on it and it makes Kepler feel awful for asking him to come. Ash spent a lot of time in the hospital. It probably left less than stellar impressions on him.

He squeezes back with what he hopes is a comforting grip as they trail the orderly through the waiting room and into the treatment area. He sheds his shoes to step on the scale, then pads in stocking feet into an exam room where the nurse screens him for any recent signs of chest pain or tightness or feeling out of breath. His answers-- not today, yet-- have her frowning when she leaves the room.

They sit in the silence of the exam room. Kepler shivers against the forced cool air pumped down from a vent in the ceiling.

“It’s going to be okay,” he reiterates, looking at Ash. This isn’t his first rodeo at the cardiologist, though he’s sure the doctor is going to rag on him for the amount of time between visits (he’s overdue).

The doctor comes in a few moments later and after a brief run-through of Kepler’s name, age, pronouns, and date of birth, she sits down on a rolly stool and looks at them.

“So do you know what triggered this latest episode? Because according to your chart, you haven’t had any problems in over five years.”

[attr="class","thadpoke"]