clarity

i used to dream in the dark of palisades park

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played by

noodles

matias
he/him
thirty-two
november 14th
saffron
straight...unless?
elite four
champion
with you
i am born anew.
1321 height
1321 height
i'll try to find you in mountains made of ash and clouds of smoke.
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8,528 posts
MATIAS SILPH DOLLARS
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TAG WITH @matias
MATIAS SILPH
clarity
POSTED ON May 5, 2024 6:30:26 GMT
MATIAS SILPH Avatar
[attr="class","retiredsilphbg"]


[attr="class","retiredsilphtxt"]

[attr="class","retiredsilphicon"]
a break? when has he ever needed a break? take out the primordial gift of boundless energy and he still wouldn't ever need one. the question could easily have been taken as a slight on him; the old him would've taken it that way, surely.

"i guess a break is fine, yeah."

his breath returns the moment she swings her leg off of him, feeling lighter already despite the heat that lingers in his face. as he sits back up, he raises a hand to wipe his cheeks down to his jaws, like one would sweat, as though that would help.

he sighs, feeling oddly nervous.

"you, uh," he looks to his side, involuntarily bumping his shoulder into hers, "you good?"
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played by

space

anna
she/her
24
july 4
mauville city
bisexual
ranger
captain
matias silph
dating
5'4 height
5'4 height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
1,611 posts
part of
TAG WITH @annalise
annalise henderson
clarity
POSTED ON May 5, 2024 7:44:18 GMT
annalise henderson Avatar
[nospaces]
[attr="class","mango annal"]
[attr="class","inner"]
[attr="class","body"]
is being weird. not his usual brand of weirdness or his new-normal weirdness — something else. she pulls her knees up to her chest and folds her arms on top of them, watching him sit up and try to rub the pink from his cheeks. [break][break]he turns to ask her a question, shoulder bumping against hers as he goes. [break][break]"yeah?" her answer lilts with confusion, denying the own flush fading from her face. "why wouldn't i be?"[break][break]she blinks up at him, gaze prying. [break][break]"are you good? you're blushing." she lifts a finger to point at his face, smiling through the accusation.
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[attr="class","bottom"]


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played by

noodles

matias
he/him
thirty-two
november 14th
saffron
straight...unless?
elite four
champion
with you
i am born anew.
1321 height
1321 height
i'll try to find you in mountains made of ash and clouds of smoke.
awards
8,528 posts
MATIAS SILPH DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @matias
MATIAS SILPH
clarity
POSTED ON May 5, 2024 7:53:09 GMT
MATIAS SILPH Avatar
[attr="class","retiredsilphbg"]


[attr="class","retiredsilphtxt"]

[attr="class","retiredsilphicon"]
is he the only one affected by this? surely not. he remembers seeing the flush of her cheeks as well, though he can't be too certain anymore.

"i don't blush." he raises a shoulder to shrug at his cheek but that only seems to make the pink harsher. "must be the sun or something. it's hot today."

extra hot given the attention she has placed on him with her accusation. he seethes quietly, then remembers he's matias silph. this is unbecoming of him. and yet, he can't find it in him to break free.

instead, his voice softens as does his gaze.

"i never properly apologized for…you know, everything, and i want to now."

he pauses.

"i'm sorry, anna. i never meant to hurt you."
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played by

space

anna
she/her
24
july 4
mauville city
bisexual
ranger
captain
matias silph
dating
5'4 height
5'4 height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
1,611 posts
part of
TAG WITH @annalise
annalise henderson
clarity
POSTED ON May 5, 2024 8:06:58 GMT
annalise henderson Avatar
[nospaces]
[attr="class","mango annal"]
[attr="class","inner"]
[attr="class","body"]
annalise shakes her head. [break][break]"it's not that hot out."[break][break]she doesn't get to rib him anymore than that. his face softens, then a sudden apology spills out. he's trying, she thinks, in his own way but it feels shallow for him to atone for everything in one big brushstroke. because he did mean to hurt her, at least at the time. [break][break]but she's here. transgression after transgression, she comes back and all is forgiven or swallowed. it's inexplicable, tangled in an attachment formed after he saved her the first time.[break][break]"is that what you've been thinking about this whole time?" [break][break]she looks away, scuffing the dirt with her sneaker. [break][break]"it's fine, matias. you were going through your groudon stuff."
[attr="class","milkycredit"] [attr="class","fas fa-cookie-bite"]

[attr="class","bottom"]


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played by

noodles

matias
he/him
thirty-two
november 14th
saffron
straight...unless?
elite four
champion
with you
i am born anew.
1321 height
1321 height
i'll try to find you in mountains made of ash and clouds of smoke.
awards
8,528 posts
MATIAS SILPH DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @matias
MATIAS SILPH
clarity
POSTED ON May 5, 2024 8:37:55 GMT
MATIAS SILPH Avatar
[attr="class","retiredsilphbg"]


[attr="class","retiredsilphtxt"]

[attr="class","retiredsilphicon"]
he knows it's not fine. how could it be? all the hurt he has caused cannot simply be atoned for with one single sorry. it'll take time; how long, he isn't sure; perhaps he isn't meant to know; all he can do is continue down this path.

a new path.

"thanks."

he sighs, feeling the heat finally start to fade.

"that's not what i was thinking about, by the way."

with another nudge on her shoulder, he gestures away.

"come on. break's over."
[attr="class","retiredsilphtag"]


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played by

space

anna
she/her
24
july 4
mauville city
bisexual
ranger
captain
matias silph
dating
5'4 height
5'4 height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
1,611 posts
part of
TAG WITH @annalise
annalise henderson
clarity
POSTED ON May 5, 2024 9:01:31 GMT
annalise henderson Avatar
[nospaces]
[attr="class","mango annal"]
[attr="class","inner"]
[attr="class","body"]
she goes for the easiest — and simplest — reply: the rise and fall of her shoulders to dismiss his thanks. they've rainchecked their relationship issues for a different time, for a different mood. she turns her head to regard him as he bumps her shoulder again, signaling the end of their break. [break][break]"already? okay."[break][break]she shifts languidly, stretching her legs out in front of her. she doesn't know if wants her to stand or return to their last lesson, so she stalls under the guise of awaiting his instruction. [break][break]"so what were you thinking about, then?"
[attr="class","milkycredit"] [attr="class","fas fa-cookie-bite"]

[attr="class","bottom"]


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played by

noodles

matias
he/him
thirty-two
november 14th
saffron
straight...unless?
elite four
champion
with you
i am born anew.
1321 height
1321 height
i'll try to find you in mountains made of ash and clouds of smoke.
awards
8,528 posts
MATIAS SILPH DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @matias
MATIAS SILPH
clarity
POSTED ON May 5, 2024 11:59:09 GMT
MATIAS SILPH Avatar
[attr="class","retiredsilphbg"]


[attr="class","retiredsilphtxt"]

[attr="class","retiredsilphicon"]
there's little use in standing unless they were to go through the entire routine again. she's already proven her proficiency on her feet; their training is more about teaching her how to survive under immense pressure; how to turn a losing position into a winning one.

as he starts moving into position, returning to top, her question almost makes him stumble, but his composure holds. his shoulders rise and fall with the same dismissal.

"oh, it's nothing."

he slides close, tapping on her leg to get her to wrap them around his waist.

"win, and maybe i'll tell you."

grinning softly, he puts his weight on her, no longer as light as he'd been before. with his face near hers again, his heart skips, and he's quick to start with a —

"go."
[attr="class","retiredsilphtag"]


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played by

space

anna
she/her
24
july 4
mauville city
bisexual
ranger
captain
matias silph
dating
5'4 height
5'4 height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
1,611 posts
part of
TAG WITH @annalise
annalise henderson
clarity
POSTED ON May 5, 2024 16:56:12 GMT
annalise henderson Avatar
[nospaces]
[attr="class","mango annal"]
[attr="class","inner"]
[attr="class","body"]
annalise eases herself onto her back, letting him crawl into position on top of her. shrugs off her question, then tells her he might tell her if she wins. she hooks her legs around his waist, trying to ignore the press of his body against hers.[break][break] she goes through the steps in her head, shifts against him to get an understanding of how difficult this undertaking will be now that he's trying. the resistance whispers the answer.[break][break]"wait ... "[break][break]there's hesitation in her voice, but she pulls him closer with conflicting confidence. [break][break]"i'm nothing?"[break][break]she pins his leg, twists her hip, tries to flip him while the question still hangs between them. it doesn't matter if it's accurate or insulting, she just wants him to be distracted.
[attr="class","milkycredit"] [attr="class","fas fa-cookie-bite"]

[attr="class","bottom"]


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played by

noodles

matias
he/him
thirty-two
november 14th
saffron
straight...unless?
elite four
champion
with you
i am born anew.
1321 height
1321 height
i'll try to find you in mountains made of ash and clouds of smoke.
awards
8,528 posts
MATIAS SILPH DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @matias
MATIAS SILPH
clarity
POSTED ON May 5, 2024 17:36:49 GMT
MATIAS SILPH Avatar
[attr="class","retiredsilphbg"]


[attr="class","retiredsilphtxt"]

[attr="class","retiredsilphicon"]
with the odds stacked against her, the way out of this difficult position would be to disrupt those odds. she does so masterfully with a single question, the hesitation behind it is what sells it, inviting guilt to rise within him.

"what? no —"

he's more than distracted enough to be flipped. the back of his head gently bounces off the ground as they finish their tangled dance, not hard enough to disorient him but enough to serve as a reminder of yet another failure. but more importantly, a reminder of her success.

he can't help but grin.

"you're so dirty."

but before she has a chance to celebrate, he bridges, hips driving up with enough momentum to lift her in the air for a brief moment. it ends with him sitting upright and her on his lap; perhaps he hadn't bridged hard enough to get her off him.

with an arm around her waist holding her close, their faces near, gazes forced to find each other. his grin fades ever so slightly.

"i —"

he glances down at her lips.
[attr="class","retiredsilphtag"]


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close tab

played by

space

anna
she/her
24
july 4
mauville city
bisexual
ranger
captain
matias silph
dating
5'4 height
5'4 height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
1,611 posts
part of
TAG WITH @annalise
annalise henderson
clarity
POSTED ON May 6, 2024 4:21:48 GMT
annalise henderson Avatar
[nospaces]
[attr="class","mango annal"]
[attr="class","inner"]
[attr="class","body"]
"yeah, i learned it from you," she taunts with a breathless laugh. had once dumped snow on her with the aid of his avatar powers and the get-back is long overdue. it's a trick that loses its luster after one use, but she's satisfied enough with once. it confirmed things that she thinks he would've otherwise kept denying.[break][break]you were thinking about me.[break][break]she knows. it's in the gratified smile that forms, however briefly, before he wipes it off her face. in true sore loser fashion, he suddenly raises his hips beneath her, startling a gasp out of her. [break][break]annalise expects to be thrown, braces for it, but she comes back down into his lap instead. he's sitting up and there's an arm bracing her back, stopping her from toppling backward.[break][break] she blinks, drinking him in. their faces are close once more, but it feels different this time. this isn't a lesson, it's a test. one that she could stretch out and stall for until she can pin down her feelings or until his patience reaches its end. [break][break]but she doesn't. there's no consideration in the beat between the glance at her lips and the reaction it spins into motion, just a desperation for something, anything. [break][break]her hand finds the back of his neck, just as he'd instructed her earlier before, and she leans in to kiss him.
[attr="class","milkycredit"] [attr="class","fas fa-cookie-bite"]

[attr="class","bottom"]


[newclass=".annal"] --accent:#FFB546!important [/newclass]
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close tab

played by

noodles

matias
he/him
thirty-two
november 14th
saffron
straight...unless?
elite four
champion
with you
i am born anew.
1321 height
1321 height
i'll try to find you in mountains made of ash and clouds of smoke.
awards
8,528 posts
MATIAS SILPH DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @matias
MATIAS SILPH
clarity
POSTED ON May 6, 2024 5:37:57 GMT
MATIAS SILPH Avatar
[attr="class","retiredsilphbg"]


[attr="class","retiredsilphtxt"]

[attr="class","retiredsilphicon"]
even if he wants to, even if he feels an instinctual pull to close the rest of the distance, he knows he can't be the one to initiate this. there are too many facets in play as a result of his past actions. one wrong move could topple what he's been trying so hard to rebuild.

his mouth parts as though to say something but the words never leave him. she kisses him, and he returns it with ease as though nothing else matters, and in that moment, he believes it.

desires breathed to life, he longs for more, feeling breathless when they eventually break, though only for a moment, short enough for him to whisper, "anna…"

his hand finds the back of her neck, and he leans in to kiss her again.
[attr="class","retiredsilphtag"]


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[newclass=.retiredsilphart img]height:100px; width: 363px; object-fit:cover; border:1px solid #aaa; border-radius:5px; position:relative; z-index:1; filter:grayscale(100%);[/newclass]
[newclass=.retiredsilphartdrk]height:100px; width: 363px; border-radius:5px; background:#303030; margin-left:1px; margin-top:-104px; position:relative; z-index:2; mix-blend-mode: lighten;[/newclass]
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close tab

played by

space

anna
she/her
24
july 4
mauville city
bisexual
ranger
captain
matias silph
dating
5'4 height
5'4 height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
1,611 posts
part of
TAG WITH @annalise
annalise henderson
clarity
POSTED ON May 6, 2024 6:40:27 GMT
annalise henderson Avatar
[nospaces]
[attr="class","mango annal"]
[attr="class","inner"]
[attr="class","body"]
annalise has deprived herself of too much. she realizes it now as dormant feelings come flooding back, carried by a fresh sting of loneliness that doesn't fully abate as she tries to get impossibly close to him, fingers sliding through his hair.
[break][break]
and the whole time, her misery looms over her shoulder, waiting for to break the kiss before tapping her on the shoulder, reminding her of its existence. [break][break]what are you doing? it asks.[break][break]what about greyson? [break][break]and dr. morales?[break][break]don't you feel bad?[break][break]it speaks in her voice, scolding her as she opens her eyes, half-lidded, at the sound of her name. selfishly, she lets him pull her back in. she kisses him with feverish finality, announcing a departure in its greediness well before she pulls back.[break][break]" — i need to go," she says suddenly, guiltily avoiding looking him in the eye. her hand finds the arm around her waist, pulling it away from her body.
[attr="class","milkycredit"] [attr="class","fas fa-cookie-bite"]

[attr="class","bottom"]


[newclass=".annal"] --accent:#FFB546!important [/newclass]
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[newclass=".mango .milkycredit"]font-size:15px; position:absolute; z-index:99; right: 12px; bottom: 60px; border-radius:100px; color:#ddd; opacity:0.6; } .mango .milkycredit a { transition:0.5s all } .mango .milkycredit a:hover { transition:0.5s all; color:var(--accent)!important; [/newclass]

close tab

played by

noodles

matias
he/him
thirty-two
november 14th
saffron
straight...unless?
elite four
champion
with you
i am born anew.
1321 height
1321 height
i'll try to find you in mountains made of ash and clouds of smoke.
awards
8,528 posts
MATIAS SILPH DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @matias
MATIAS SILPH
clarity
POSTED ON May 6, 2024 6:53:37 GMT
MATIAS SILPH Avatar
[attr="class","retiredsilphbg"]


[attr="class","retiredsilphtxt"]

[attr="class","retiredsilphicon"]
guilt looms over him, too, reminding him of the man who'd given up their life just so he could be here today, free of the shackles that once bound him to his patron. what has he done to repay them since? what good has he done? what does this achieve except satiating desires and loneliness?

with time, he will process that this is perhaps different. what he refuses to realize and accept is that it may be different only for him, and not her.

his arm shows no resistance as it's pulled away from her body.

" — wait, i'm sorry." the tremble in his voice is gentle. kind. "i shouldn't have done that."

even if he so intensely wanted to.
[attr="class","retiredsilphtag"]


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played by

space

anna
she/her
24
july 4
mauville city
bisexual
ranger
captain
matias silph
dating
5'4 height
5'4 height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
1,611 posts
part of
TAG WITH @annalise
annalise henderson
clarity
POSTED ON May 6, 2024 7:32:38 GMT
annalise henderson Avatar
[nospaces]
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doesn't fight against the gentle disentanglement of their bodies. it makes it easier for her to pull away, but something catches on the stitches covering the yawning void of her loneliness, tugging each one open in succession as she stands up.[break][break]"i did it."[break][break]normally, she would let gentle words coax her off the edge, but she feels like she might explode if she stays. [break][break]"it's my fault."[break][break]for kissing him. and now for running away again. she turns her head to search for her altaria.
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played by

noodles

matias
he/him
thirty-two
november 14th
saffron
straight...unless?
elite four
champion
with you
i am born anew.
1321 height
1321 height
i'll try to find you in mountains made of ash and clouds of smoke.
awards
8,528 posts
MATIAS SILPH DOLLARS
part of
TAG WITH @matias
MATIAS SILPH
clarity
POSTED ON May 6, 2024 8:00:09 GMT
MATIAS SILPH Avatar
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"it's not anyone's fault."

fault would imply blame which has no place here as neither of them did anything wrong. they simply followed their wants in a time of vulnerability. and yet the guilt feels palpable — why?

"anna, it's fine, really."

he stands up, showing fight and a semblance of urgency as she looks for her altaria.

"will you stay? it's still early, and—"

—and i want to spend more time with you.
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