victor stood when lana said he wanted to leave. it was what he wanted. and despite his refusal in his mind, in this dream, it was accepted and acceptance.

"i'll follow where you go lana." and he seemed content with that. "let's go home." the two of them would be going home, safe and sound together. his normal clarity was beginning to return. outside of this dream or nightmare or whatever it was, he would be back to himself on the outside. his internal turmoil still going. but content.

though there was no telling exactly how long that would last or what the next breaking point would be. it was all a matter of time. and circumstance.

---

ruslan skye

he was comfortable the way they were. resting like this. but lana wasn't. lana wanted to go somewhere else and of course victor was going to oblige. it was what he wanted.

his relationship with his ex had been a dog desperately following. and in this state victor had no problem with it being the same. he craved the stability that he once had. he craved the attention, even if it had been faked and fleeting. from nowhere the metaphorical leash and collar once more appeared in reality.

"you're the one in control lana, you can take me wherever you like." he said this, firmly placing the rope in the other man's hand and holding it there. "just tell me what you want." and he would do anything to make it so. if lana wanted to leave, then they would leave.

---

ruslan skye

lana's hand in his, squeezing it as it was, happened to be a string tying them together. it was an imprint. a connection. an attachment. it was a delight for victor. he was reassured and not being pushed away. he was calmed. in his strange way anyways.

"it's okay... he can't hurt you now." never mind the fact that lana wasn't in any danger to begin with. the idea that the other man might be upset with what had happened escaped his brain at the moment. he inched closer to him, his free arm wrapping around lana's waist and pulling him closer. attempting to ignore the grip that he had on the ghost pokemon.

his forehead resting gently on lana's chest he took deep breaths. eyes closing to try and regain composure. there was nothing for lana to fear as long as he was there. the body on the floor began to fade away, and the other man was long gone. the one that his ex had brought to their former marriage bed.

all that was there now was lana with him in the room. no more guns. no more betrayal. a ribbon appeared, tying their wrists together with a bow. bright red and tightly bound it wasn't tight enough to hurt but firm enough that it was there. "lana... lana... lana..." they were there together now. and they wouldn't be separated in the dream again.

---

ruslan skye

even the most loyal of dogs would eventually bite when pushed to far. when hit too hard. and as he dropped his grip and the body fell to the floor he could feel himself coming forward out of the forced state the dream had him in. his guts curling and hands aching as he realized what he had done. again.

how could he expect lana to come to him now? now that he had seen what he had done? what he was capable of? he would run. he would leave. of course he would. he would abandon him. leaving him to his own devices. back to the pit he had been in. this was why he had been so desperate not to be attached. this was why he had been so desperate to stay far away from others.

this feeling.

he couldn't help it though. now he was stuck here again. dropping to the floor he inched his way closer to lana, hand outstretched to try and grab him. to tell him that it was alright. it was just a bad dream and he didn't need to be afraid. after all that's what this was. just another one of his nightmares. never mind that the nightmare was a memory.

but he knows his eyes are still wide, and his face is still bleeding even in this dream as he reaches for him. "lana..." he needs the reassurance. he needs someone else to take hold of the reigns that have been left alone for far too long.

---

ruslan skye

victor knew that if the trigger wasn't pulled now he would find a way to kill the other man. regardless of the ties that binded them and regardless of how he felt he knew for a fact that he would feel his hands wrapped around his throat one way or another. if he wasn't killed first. and he opened his mouth to tell him so as he heard the faintest of shouts. his eyes confused. because this wasn't how he remembered it. no one shouted his name. no one even knew that this had happened.

but he knew that voice. he knew that person. shaking his head he tried to come back to some sort of senses. to figure out why that voice was here of all places. it was too soon for him to be here. too soon for lana to see him. he would know about these horrors if he did. he would know what he had done.

the gun went off, shooting past his head and bullet grazing his cheek as it put a hole into the headboard. a warning shot. but they only ever kept one bullet in the gun. it was now. it was his time to strike while there was nothing in the chamber. but his mind screamed for his body not to move as he lunged towards his ex husband once more. internally screaming no as he felt his hands wrap around his neck and push him into the wall.

he tried to fight himself but the memory was too strong. the instinct too strong. "l-look away..." was what he uttered with a struggle as he kept his hands firmly tightened. he didn't want lana to see that he was vicious. that he wasn't behaving.

---

ruslan skye

he couldn't hear lana at first. the sound of laughter ringing through his mind and ears as he tried to cover the latter. feeling eyes on him as he felt his stupidity seem to finally become clear. he had been too trusting. too willing. too nice. all of the things he had promised that he was going to be when he fell in love with his ex. he had become the fool. and now he was being revealed as such.

his body started to move as it did before. like a beast. wild and feral as he launched himself from the bed. fury and tears in his eyes as he aimed for the throat. ready to bite and choke his way back into the rage he had felt before. ready to break himself down by breaking whatever he could get his hands on. the fist hit his jaw, exactly as it had back then. forcing him back to the bed as he roared in anger.

another lunge and the gun kept by his bedside was cocked and pointed at his head. more laughter. 'pathetic'. just as before. the voice that haunted his nightmares. 'the animal i brought in going against me? you wish.' his eyes stung with tears once more as he bit down on his lip hard. blood leaking lightly from it. he was right of course. victor had always been an animal on a leash. and now he felt like it was choking him.

---

ruslan skye

while his pokemon did the actual work of rigging rolls and whatnot, victor had settled into his one and only past time. gambling. the thrill of winning was far better than anything else he dealt with normally. and the fact that he was extremely good at it meant that he was prepared to do anything to win. until a ratty looking... person... was shoved next to him instead of his actual opponent.

there was no thrill in winning against someone who had no actual money. borrowed chips meant nothing when he wouldn't have the money to pay off whatever debts he accrued here. especially if he got addicted. "are you sure you want to do this?" his voice was even, neutral perhaps. "just give me your chips." he held his hand out for them. "i'll put them against someone who'll lose even more." maybe then this guy would leave.

---

ruslan skye

his hands gripped the sheets as his memories recalled the faded words that his ex had spoken to him, how he'd sat down on the bed to explain things to him. as if victor was an idiot and unable to grasp the fact that he was a cheater. dressing it up with pretty words and content. all while being hung on by someone else.

the shock caused something to tik in his mind. something to change. something to warp. it had been whatever had been controlled by the fact that he felt loved and safe. the things he'd kept buried inside him. the instability that danced along the edge of his mental state. it surged like a wave as he began to feel an icy chill wash over him.

until he heard something different. the sound of another voice. calling his name? a familiar voice but yet one he could not place with his head so foggy. so congested by memories of his past. but he knew that voice. he knew them.

---

ruslan skye

the sound of footsteps across the floor reached his ears as he slept. a giggling noise as he heard another pair of footsteps. he opened his eyes, the familiar surroundings of his apartment as sunbeams began to creep over his eyes. it was early. but he was late. last nights party had been too much and he had decided not to go anywhere today.

the sound of footsteps approaching his apartment. had someone broken in? for a cheap thrill? his husband wasn't beside him. long gone to whatever office meeting he had today. he could handle his alcohol better than victor after all. he reached for a pokeball but knew he'd left them in the living room, along with his belt. reached for a gun but found the night stand empty.

it must have been moved. so instead he just waited as the door pushed open, a familiar invader and one of the men he'd hired recently for his office.

his husband burst out laughing as he saw the confused look on victor's face, the young man shushing him in silence as they both began to burst out laughing. he had been made a fool of. again.

---

ruslan skye

as the mist began to drift through the party he felt as though his eyes were playing tricks on him. in the mist he saw things, though he was pretty sure it was either because of his brain or because... well. who knew really. he was used to kind of seeing fucked up things sometimes. but he was content right now, so there would be no need for that. "lana... do you?" he wanted to ask if lana saw the same things as him. but he was worried about it all. especially with the glimpses of his brain that seemed to be appearing in the mists.

---

bothering ruslan skye

gently he began to brush his fingers through ruslan's hair. it was soft and nice. the shampoo he'd been getting him was working nicely. "we can go wherever you want. though it will have to be in between my work time." since he needed to make money to get lana everything his heart desired. and more. always more.

"if you start to feel ill you need to tell me, so that i can get you checked." there would be no more chansey's looking over lana if victor could have his way. he'd make sure he had the best of medical treatment. "i don't want anything to happen to you." he continued to pet his hair, content with sitting here like this.

---

bothering ruslan skye

it was complicated to think that tonight was just another date. it was. and it wasn't. it was the solidification of a baseline at the very least that had been watery previous. but victor's self was falling into place. "you can choose where we go, if you want." but that was about all ruslan could probably do. after all he didn't have the money to pay for anything and he didn't have the means to really make it. meaning wherever they went victor would be the one footing the bill. and he was fine with that. "you aren't getting cold are you?" he didn't want ruslan to get sick after all.

---

bothering ruslan skye