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Caleb isn't phased by the anger. He knows it's misdirected, but he also knows it's important to allow Greyson this moment of catharsis. Better him than someone who wouldn't understand...who would take it more personally, or worse, retaliate.[break][break]
"Sorry to disappoint, but you don't get to choose who cares about you."[break][break]
He folds his arms - firm, but still calm - acutely aware that the Delphox is still in the room, watching him with pinpricks of molten red-gold. She may have allowed this, but she's Greyson's companion, and she will make quick work of Caleb should he become a threat.[break][break]
Even a wrongly-accused one.[break][break]
"I know you probably think I'm incapable of empathy because of my past - and it's that exact sort of bias that does, often, make me want to punch your lights out instead of talk to you - BUT." He pauses to suck in a breath. Still, his patience perseveres; still, he approaches this from the high ground. "But, I can empathize with what you're going through. I really can."[break][break]
Trauma has a way of sticking to the soul.[break][break]
"Apathy is easy," he murmurs, softly now. "Giving up is easy."[break][break]
Every day he fights it, the shadow that strides behind him, the constant reminder of the sins he's committed. How simple it would be to take another drink, to numb the pain, to make himself useless again.[break][break]
"But the world is better off with you in it, fighting for it. Trust me on this."

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Who knew a Pidove could pack such a powerful punch?![break][break]
Luckily, Isaac once more used his unrelenting penchant for protecting others with everything he had - even if it meant his own defeat - to direct his Mega-evolved Corviknight to block the oncoming HEAT WAVE. It was an impressive last stand, followed up by an intense hurricane of Flying energy meant to down the Mega-Altaria once and for all. Caleb whistled, respect for Halberd rising, realizing that all of Isaac's Pokemon seemed to have that same never-give-up attitude their trainer had. He'd hate to be on the other end of that pesky resilience.[break][break]
That left the Pidove up to Lyra to handle. The Mega-Evolved Lapras towered over the little fellow, but Caleb knew now that they absolutely ought not underestimate it. In fact, they ought to take a leaf out of Isaac's book, and hit hard - it would serve another purpose, as well: show Lam that they were humble enough to recognize that even the smallest, seemingly harmless Pokemon should be treated as a potential threat. Gym battles were supposed to show the trainer's cunning and preparedness as much as their Pokemon's power, right?[break][break]
"Follow Halberd's lead!" He called out to Lyra.[break][break]
He could tell she understood by the way her eyes began to glow a bright, icy blue. The temperature dropped dramatically, and Caleb shivered. A blizzard began to form around Lyra's great shell, coalescing into a tornado of ice and snow. The G-MAX RESONANCE blasted forth towards the Pidove, and Caleb felt victory brush against their fingertips.

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Had Aurelie always been this talkative? A lop-sided smile formed across Caleb's lips as she rambled on about the menu, her obvious delight at his presence endearing enough to relax his shoulders and soften his demeanor, smoothing out the edges anxiety had wrought upon his figure.[break][break]
But then he watched her expression melt into a complex mix of happiness and concern. The way her brow furrowed ever so slightly; the way her visible eye seemed, though gentle, shadowed by something - a sadness? - that reeked of pity. He felt suddenly uncomfortable, then, realizing, perhaps, that she had likely heard about his recent capture by Rocket. How - he wasn't sure: maybe she knew other Rangers. Maybe she knew Isaac.[break][break]
Of course she knows Isaac, he chastised himself. Why he felt so confident of that, he had no idea. But it felt right. It felt true. Like all of the other blurry memories he had of them together, living in Galar.[break][break]
Her gratitude was genuine, however. That much was clear. Caleb did not lose his smile, doing his best to ignore the small tremors in his hands, the way his chest constricted if he thought too hard about BARNABY FINCH's prison.[break][break]
"I don't think the Rangers will be less busy any time soon," he commented, trying not to sound overly ominous. She knew as well as he did that their region was in constant peril these days. "So I think it's important for us to...take the time to relax when we can."[break][break]
A waitress appeared, and Caleb requested coffee - black, no sugar, just pure caffeine. It was a blessing, to be given a few more heartbeats of extra time to consider how best to answer Aurelie's general inquiry.[break][break]
"I'm..." Trying to bounce back? Fighting to maintain my sanity? Afraid my brother, who is a literal walking nightmare, will find me and kill me? "...I'm doing okay."[break][break]
It was usually enough. But this time, it wasn't. He hated lying to her the moment the words slipped from his mouth.[break][break]
"Dammit, that's not it." He sighed, running a hand through his hair, and letting the mask of composure slip - just a little. "I'm sorry, Aurelie, but I'm a fucking mess."

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"Yeah, freya morningstar. The Councilwoman." He hears the bitterness, the vitriol, the resentment. He gets it, he does. But it won't do Greyson any good, and Caleb's faced far worse than this. He's faced himself. "We've both been worried about you."[break][break]
Greyson slams the door in his face.[break][break]
Except he doesn't. He wants to - he definitely wants to - but he can't, because a psychic force keeps it open. Caleb pokes his head inside, sees the Delphox standing stoically in the background, paw raised. Caleb nods to her in thanks, then slips through the doorway, entering to find Greyson's home dim and unkept and saturated with an overwhelming aura of neglect.[break][break]
They stand in awkward silence, Greyson's glare sharp enough to cut through flesh.[break][break]
"Look. I just wanted to check up on you. Make sure you're okay." He runs his hand through his hair, fighting the urge to look away from the intensity of the other man's stare. "After what happened with those Rockets, in Area Zero, I thought you might be..." Anxious? Suffering? Drowning in self-loathing? "...having a hard time."[break][break]
You almost killed someone.

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Caleb stared, slack-jawed, at the trio of Pokemon. They were attempting to explain the situation, he knew, but it wasn't making a ton of sense. Was the girl's Wigglytuff laughing?[break][break]
Nox hopped over to the Primeape, chittering animatedly and gesturing with his thin arms. As they tried to communicate, Caleb glanced back down at the girl - only to see that she was starting to move.[break][break]
She was clearly disoriented - and in pain - so the last thing he wanted to do was startle her further. He backed up slightly, trying to look totally unassuming, like there was no way he could have been involved in her "accident" - or worse, like someone trying to rob a defenseless, passed-out child.[break][break]
"Hi there," he said, keeping his tone friendly. "My name's Caleb, and I'm a Ranger."[break][break]
Seeing her try - and fail - to stand, Caleb took out another Pokeball, releasing Comet. The Lucario, keen as he was, immediately sensed the need for aid. Lowering his head, he generated a HEAL PULSE, directing it towards the girl and hoping it would make some kind of difference.[break][break]
"I, uh, found you laying on the ground while I was passing through this area. How did that happen, exactly? Do you remember?"

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It was like looking into fractured panes of glass: a shattered mirror, spider-webbing outwards in a thousand different directions, each one more beautiful than the last. The memories were a heap of broken images - cruelty, tenderness, desire, devotion - and Caleb felt suddenly displaced, unable to ground himself in any one reality. Strong arms guided Barnaby onto his lap, straddled just right, hands splayed along hip and lower back.[break][break]
He'd imagined this countless ways, and every version had been a violent recompense. But this was some alternate path, some improbable probability, a bridge that connected past to present, dreaming to waking, hatred to love. This was something tender, something worth slowing down for, something sweet to the taste.[break][break]
"Yes," Caleb whispered to Barnaby, voice hoarse. "Yes, it is."[break][break]
It was a watercolor wash of deliberate, drawn-out love-making. They moved against one another in high-tide harmonium, ecstasy building until it was, quite literally, to much to bear. The release he'd been seeking came and went, and it was with a heavy-hearted exhaustion that Caleb collapsed onto the bed, drawing Barnaby to him in one graceful motion and holding him close - tangled as they so often had been, in the bed they'd shared for twenty years.[break][break]
This was not that bed, and this was not that Barnaby, but for a moment, it was enough.[break][break]
Enough to reassure Caleb that Barnaby had loved him, once.[break][break]
Enough to kindle the smallest hope that Barnaby loved him still.

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Oh, he does look like shit.[break][break]
Bags under his eyes, purpled and bruised. Hair mussed, a few strands plastered to his forehead. Pale and clammy, like he'd seen a ghost. Hands shaking, movements unstable: a gentle breeze could blow him right over.[break][break]
Caleb knows these signs. It's like looking in a mirror and seeing himself from five years ago staring back.[break][break]
He doesn't reek of alcohol, at least.[break][break]
"I got it from Freya," Caleb tells him truthfully, keeping his voice calm. "I've been looking for you, but you haven't been at your office."[break][break]
He can see the anger etched along Greyson's clenched jaw, but he does not shy away from it.[break][break]
"Can I come in?"

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Somehow, it's been weeks since he'd almost died in that Arceus-forsaken cave system underneath of the Silent Icelands. Somehow, he's still alive, chugging along like a freight train on its last gallon of fuel. And somehow, he's here, at the house of Greyson Connors.[break][break]
His hand is raised, hovering over the door as if frozen. He rehearses the words he'd been planning to say, letting them slide across his lips with a whispered weariness. In the end, he won't say any of them. He'll just stare at Greyson in troubled hues of blue and ask, "Are you okay?"[break][break]
And he won't be okay. Caleb's sure of that. He knows it like he knows the back of his own hand. He knows it like he knows the contours of his own heart. He knows because he's been where Greyson's been, the same dark pit, only nobody had been there to drag him out of it. He'd descended further and further until he'd signed his soul away in blood, allowed the demons of Kanto to tear him limb from limb, redemption slipping through the cracks - like trying to hold light in the palm of one's hand: impossible.[break][break]
He knocks.

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TAGS – coal doe[break]
NOTES – GREAT CHASM EXCURSION A: EXPLORE[break][break]

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TAGS – ollie morales[break]
NOTES – Mission[break][break]

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TAGS – coal doe[break]
NOTES – GREAT CHASM EXCURSION A: EXPLORE[break][break]

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