[attr="class","dangericon"]

[attr="class","dangertxt"]
Munching on the krabby rangoon he had ordered while he waited, the crumbs of the crunchy treat littered the lap of his gengar patterned romper. So embarrassed had Epitaph been at the garment, he had actually deigned to stay within his pokeball than be seen with his garish master. The sign across from him on the table read something about V. Hunky.
[break][break]
He had no clue who that was, but surely wasn't a descriptor of the supposed gentleman. The boy couldn't say he was too into muscles, but given who put this event on, perhaps it would be a theme. Then again, he was here, and nothing about Andy was hunky. When he saw the older lady approaching, the chewing ceased.
[break][break]
No fucking way. As she drew closer, the bitterness swallowed him as he realized the truth of the situation. After her introduction, he gulped his current bite down hard. ''Yeah. Cool. Great.'' He fired in rapid succession. Leaning onto the table he glared with an intense chocolate gaze. ''Is this a fucking joke? First that Schwartz dick hole tries to kill me at Mauville, and now this.''

[attr="class","dangerfoot"]

[attr="class","dangericon"]

[attr="class","dangertxt"]
He leaned back into his hair at her own outburst, answering her previous quizzical expression with one of his own. Glancing down at his ensemble after her observation, he looked no less puzzled. Character? Gengar was a real thing. Seemed like an odd choice of words to him. Then she whipped out a book, a manga to be precise.
[break][break]
Is this lady alright in the head? He wondered to himself. Never had he seen someone her age act like this about manga. His brown eyes flicked between the book and the woman a couple times. Can a gengar even grow a mustache? It seemed preposterous, but then anything was possible in manga, not like the real world in which they resided.
[break][break]
''Thanks...'' He accepted the phone case. His own phone was oddly still as naked as it had been fresh out of the box. Andy had just been too lazy to ever pick anything for it. Still, he gave an uncertain stare. I wonder if she's fucking with me... Maybe this is all a trick It all certainly seemed like a prank. ''I'm Andy.'' He wondered... ''Is a 'date' like this even legal?''

[attr="class","dangerfoot"]

[attr="class","dangericon"]

[attr="class","dangertxt"]
The boy blinked at her response. He swore he had read 'speed dating' somewhere during his involvement with this. But then again, this lady seemed a little touched to him. Her next sentence didn't do her any favors. Didn't everyone meet someone for the first time? Perhaps it was just phrasing, but he was starting to suspect that Balder had picked a real psycho for him.
[break][break]
''What? Bored?'' She had only arrived just moments before. Scarfing down his last krabby rangoon, he went after her. It was considered for a moment to just sit there, but at this point he wasn't convinced she wouldn't pull a knife on him and stick him a few times. Paranoid as it was, she didn't give him the impression of stability.
[break][break]
And it had not even been five minutes.
[break][break]
The first place she led him was to a garish stand that sold various hot beverages. Michiko had chosen wine. Now he realized why this felt so off. This was like dating his aunt, who was just as eccentric and certainly liked wine just as much. Andy started to feel a little ill at the thought of spending quality time with what could be one of his aunt's drinking buddies.
[break][break]
Blimey! She really is just like that flappy floozy! The impersonation was complete when she bought him a glass. He looked with obvious uncertainty at the glass, then at the salesman. Dude, do you see this shit? Couldn't he perhaps lose his license? But he didn't seem to care. Cautiously, he took the cup from her.
[break][break]
What if this was some creep's trick to get him drunk and take advantage of him? A paranoid gaze was fired into the warm red liquid as nightmare scenarios filled his mind. Certainly, one cup wouldn't floor him, he reassured himself. She hadn't put anything in it. Still, he couldn't help but wonder if this was a scheme. Hesitantly, he took a sip.
[break][break]
His tongue was assaulted by a flavor that was spicy, sweet, and a tad bitter. It was okay, but certainly not something he was drink regularly. He made a face at it.
[break][break]
''How do you old foogies drink this all the time?''

[attr="class","dangerfoot"]

[attr="class","dangericon"]

[attr="class","dangertxt"]
Figuring the question was rhetorical, he just stared. He didn't like it in fact. However, he neither hated it. Michiko seemed amused, also mentioning that her own children didn't care for it. Blinking he wondered why she bought it for him in the first place. Suppose he did like it. Would she get him inebriated and leave him passed out somewhere? He swirled the liquid in the cup.
[break][break]
This was weird.
[break][break]
''Yeah, just like everything else.'' Another sip was suffered as he agreed with her, at least in a way. Shrugging at her next comment continued. ''If there's interest.'' To him there was a dark side to such ideals. No one on this planet tries everything they see, lady. There's adventure and then there just being dragged the fuck along. His normal crassness was contained though.
[break][break]
''Yeah, no sweat.'' She struck him as fairly loopy, or perhaps she was foreign as well. Her wording seemed strange to him, but then so did she entirely. As Michiko continued along, the boy stood a moment before following, wondering if she would just wander off alone if he didn't move. Then things pivoted again, as the woman halted to launch into the 'look at my kids' routine.
[break][break]
What does she expect me to say? Nice tits? In his mind there was a good reason anyone hated being shown someone else's baby pictures. ''They look... lovely.'' He made something up on the spot, head swiveling left to right for a moment as he struggled to find a word, struggled to remain nice. When she asked where he was from his eyes narrowed slightly.
[break][break]
Had she done all that just to pose that question?
[break][break]
''Galar. Born and raised. If you couldn't tell by my accent.''

[attr="class","dangerfoot"]

[attr="class","dangericon"]

[attr="class","dangertxt"]
''The old folks home?'' He couldn't resist answering her question with such snark. It just slipped right out before he even thought about it. She nearly trampled the response with her own, making him wonder if her query was meant to be rhetorical. He didn't know much about Petalburg having only been in Hoenn since the summer.
[break][break]
''Your words? Yeah.'' What she was saying could be understood, but what she meant, or more why she was doing it was far more obscure. Andy had to contain his laughter when she said she would speak slowly for him. ''Oh, thanks so much.'' Though it sounded as empty as a government promise.
[break][break]
Suddenly another guy showed up, and going by Michiko's explanation, it was none other than Hunky himself. The boy supposed he looked hunky enough, but he couldn't say he found it appealing personally. After all, the last slab of muscle he had encounter tried to burn him alive so he figured it best to avoid such people for any serious encounter.
[break][break]
Who knew what that protein powder did to one's mind?
[break][break]
''Yeah. It was a real pleasure.'' If only he could disappear into the shadows like gengar. He missed having Epitaph around for this. His pokemon would have made things much more entertaining. Vicky admitted he loved gengar as well, causing his attention to refocus on the conversation. Why was he flexing while he said that? Andy made a face.
[break][break]
''Oh, uh. I guess not.'' He offered the cup when the man asked him if he was going to finish. Seemed quite strange to him to drink after a random kid, but hell, maybe he liked wine that much. ''Anyway, I think I need to hit a shitter and head home.'' A poor excuse to exfiltrate, but it was the first that came to mind. ''Good luck with your boozing and all. Nice meeting you, I guess.''
[break][break]
With the subtlest of waves, he began to saunter off into the crowd.

[attr="class","dangerfoot"]