willow, on the other hand, has been riding consistently for a few years now, more so now that she has time on her hands. even her mudbray, lucky, has evolved since she's been able to work the livestock more.

granted, willow could have gone a few more months without having to take care of two fully grown horses alongside the rest of her duties. 

not many of her friends have mounts or have the time to ride. roman shows zero interest and would rather sit inside and play video games all day. her mother's in no shape to ride and the only other person who consistently did so is buried a few miles away. 

"oh, please," she says as she feeds lou some apple slices. the mudsdale nickers appreciatively, tail whisking away pests. 

"we can walk them for all i care. i'm just happy for the company." lou snorts as though to say he cares very much if that's all they do. 

Elisabeth Fiorelli

☉

her offer had been genuine, but she knows elisa well enough to expect the wave of her hand and the dismissal. when the woman agrees to do something, she does it - whether it's horseback riding or bringing a homecooked meal when eleanor has a rough day.

lou shifts his weight when willow saddles him. his head bobs and he chews his bit impatiently. "oh, don't be a brat," she says as she gives him a hefty pat on his large neck. 

lotus' own clopping hooves spur lou to move and the pair settle into a neat walk. willow's hips sway and the rhythm is a comfort, familiar enough she need only hold the reins loosely, attentive to elisa. 

she blinks. "gods, don't be! we've all been through so much. with the meteor and everything, i've just been trying to keep my head on straight. i'm sure you were too."

Elisabeth Fiorelli

☉

willow's breath comes in short, puffing curls. the cold brings a red flush to her cheeks, but she's okay with a sweater wrapped around her neck, knit cap over her ears, and well-worn gloves over her hands. the reins are relaxed in her left hand, right against her thigh. 

the cold doesn't bother her so much, not with the way the snow dances with the soot in the sky. there's a quiet blanket that always accompanies the snowfall, especially up in fallarbor.

her smile is thin now at the somewhat dreary discussion, but there's relief in this discussion. she hasn't really talked about it with anyone. how could she? the only people closest to her in life were fighting the damn thing?

how does her own fear withstand that? how can she ever look at bo or lance or ollie or greyson and say, i was terrified? 

"i wondered if you spent it with any family. or friends in town. i should have reached out to you." she sighs. "...roman and mom and me, we all just waited. held our breaths. ro fell asleep with me; he wouldn't let me leave his room. i just kept looking at him and thinking this isn't fair."

Elisabeth Fiorelli

☉

"i know you wouldn't ask it," willow says immediately, adjusting her grip on the reins to compensate for the cold leeching into her fingers. lou doesn't trot as nicely as lotus, but willow still finds a certain ease to divvying up her attention from the horse and their conversation. 

"but time given is worth so much more than time taken." is that why she never asks anything of anyone? is that why, after all these years, she refuses to make the first move with the things that matter? surely not.

she's been thinking a lot about her new year's resolution lately. not that she particularly ascribes to the guilt that surrounds it, but it's supposed to be a helpful exercise. and hers is important. a much-needed change. 

to be more honest with herself. and with that, she thinks i have not spent enough time with my friend elisabeth. she can right this wrong. she can make time, like she did for this, because her friend is hurting, hesitating, and needs someone to lean on. 

don't they all? 

"did she love flowers like us?" will smiles softly. "you know it was my father who tended our gardens? who filled our lives with flowers? my mother knew its language, but only because of him."

Elisabeth Fiorelli

☉

"if she's anything like you," willow agrees. she looks fondly upon her friend, at the token of their platonic affections wrapped around her neck in a symbolic, wordless thank you. the snow continues to fall pleasantly around them. lou snorts, sending a puff of curled breath around his snout. 

"that's the best part of it, i think. having this dumb little language no one else knows but the two of you." how fiercely she wishes roman had any desire to learn what they meant. he's familiar enough with some of the negative ones, much to willow's own annoyance.

but you have to start somewhere, right? 

"his parents. he was born and raised in fallarbor on the farm. it was more of a cattle farm then. flowers were my grandmother's hobby.

"he never wanted that life for himself. at least, that's what he thought. so he moved to rustboro and starting working at devon as a software engineer, of all things." she laughs. "he met my mother and i think that's when he started to realize how much he missed all this." she gestures around them. 

"he regretted not patching things up with his father before he passed. i think that's why he was so...gentle with me when i got pregnant."

her shoulders shake with a chuckle. "sorry. i don't mean to ramble about them." her voice catches, eyes smarting, and she blinks rapidly. "i miss him. and my mom."

Elisabeth Fiorelli

☉

"thank you," she says quietly. it's hard to talk about these things. it's hard to talk about regrets. gosh knows she has a dozen of those. and those unspoken ones she thinks about while elisa confides in her pieces of her past. 

by most accounts, she does not know her friend very well. she knows she's a widow, and that her marriage had been complicated and unhappy. but the extent of that knowledge is threadbare at best. am i a bad friend?

elisa would say no, she thinks, and that's some comfort, but not enough for her to feel like she hasn't given as much as she could. 

"i'd never thought of it like that, in so many words, but i think you're right. my world turned upside down when i had roman. i don't think i need to tell you how hard it was having a kid that young. i saw friends get to travel. go to college. pursue their passions." she chuckles. "fall in love.

"and i mourn sometimes, for what i could have had, but i also think if i hadn't gone through with the pregnancy, i'd wonder about having him. what could have been then. i think maybe that's why i get so paralyzed by decisions. if i don't make one, then i don't have to face the idea of having regrets."

the chill is internal and unwelcome now. she offers a wan smile to elisa and then clicks her cheek. lou spurs into a quicker trot and then lopes into a canter, with willow's smile growing wider as they surge ahead of their companions.

Elisabeth Fiorelli

☉

it's not instant regret. she's so caught up in handling lou, in finding the rhythm of her legs in the saddle, that elisabeth's nigh-whispered words take a long time to piece together. but when she does, her smile falls, and her gait struggles to match lou's canter. she gets smacked by the saddle and knows she's going to be nursing one hell of a bruise the next morning. 

lou tosses his head and she squeezes his reins, pulling him to the side lest he accidentally get too close to lotus and elisabeth under willow's poor riding. now neck and neck, she shoots her friend a worried look. 

but finds a tenderness there, a certain thrill as she slides into the rhythm of lotus' canter. 

so, feeling breathless, and deciding that words can be had later, she kicks her heels and clicks, spurring lou into a gallop. 

Elisabeth Fiorelli

☉