rosie
she / her
15
October 15
Vermilion City, Kanto
unknown
Explorer
Lorekeeper
But I still believe, someday this lie will set me free
TAG WITH @eris
Eris Halla
reasons [s]
POSTED ON Sept 24, 2023 9:10:18 GMT
[nospaces] [attr="class","adrie-cover"] [attr="class","adrie-ban"] [attr="class","adrie-lyric1"]To the monster you became [attr="class","adrie-b"] [attr="class","adrie-c"] [attr="class","adrie-lyric2"]I'll be your CONTRADICTION [attr="class","top-acc"] [attr="class","adrie-content1"] [attr="class","adrie-content2"] [attr="class","adrie-img"] [attr="class","adrie-img2"] [attr="class","inner-finally"]It's only when you've said things that you can't take back that you realise just how deep it cuts.[break][break] "I- I followed protocols. I told people where I was going."[break][break] But she ran and hid from the League. She hadn't trusted Razz, or Doug, or Eva.[break][break] "Pa... Chu-e's done so much..."[break][break] More than he would ever know, but he's right in that she's burning every piece of him that he's sacrificed to get her here, isn't he?[break][break] And what is she meant to say when she tells him not to hate? When she knows all too well how he feels? When she, of all the people in this vast, lonely world, should know how he feels?[break][break] "I-"[break][break] If it takes losing him, if it takes losing someone else just to realise how much she's messed up -[break][break] The windows flutter shut, the door locks click, the floorboards creak as a bitter wind sweeps through the house. And she hears it, a gentle cooing that echoes in her head. Is she truly regretting things? Is she truly understanding what she's putting others through?[break][break] Or does she just not want him to hate her too?[break][break] "I'm sorry."[break][break] This fixes nothing.[break][break] "I didn't mean... I- I know you wouldn't hurt me, I just-" There's no just to justify any of what she's said to him. "I'm sorry."[break][break] It's the most genuine she's been in years. And it makes her chest feel so tight that she can't simply talk to him about anything. She remembers how hollow she had felt, how everything felt so cold yet her insides burned so unbearably hot when she sat there in the same room as THEO BECKETT: The one who had taken it all away from them.[break][break] "I wish I could be angry like you were."[break][break] For the right things, at the right people. She sucks up those tears she has no rights to shed, reaching for the kettle in the corner. And she'll turn to the sink to fill it up, just so that silence isn't the only thing that fills the gap between them. 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