[attr="class","icon"]

leaving for the kitchen couldn’t stop him from listening. his prep work was downright sluggish. he was certainly not paying attention to pancakes — which was strange for him.[break][break]

it was annoying to be woken up like this, but it was especially annoying that willow sat on the couch next to ollie, consoling him in his confusion while he’d only been lonely in dealing with his own.[break][break]

he hadn’t told her in high school. it had been silent and personal, a curiosity just barely explored and then all but abandoned — mostly because he’d pursued her instead, and then he’d never stopped loving her. it had been a nonissue. being bisexual had not felt like such a key part of his identity, anyways.[break][break]

so why now, in this moment, did he feel like he was hiding something?[break][break]

ollie’s words carved through his back to his heart. they’d shared one drunken night and it hadn’t even gotten that far, but he’d been emotional, feeling like the world was going to end that week, and willow would be in someone else’s arms, and his son would probably die mad at him for something. he would have failed both of his brothers and his mother, and never have mended things with his father.[break][break]

he had never felt quite so lonely as he had that week, and ollie had been smiling like an angel.[break][break]

it hurt more because it was so unexpected from someone who seemed so caring.[break][break]

”gee, thanks,” he muttered at him never finding a guy hot. must’ve been drunker than i thought. at least they’d only made out. if only he could take it back.[break][break]

then, through the power of the years he’d spent pining for her, he could hear that willow was prompting him to speak without having to look at her.[break][break]

he set down the pancake mix and turned, looking ollie dead in the eye again with a hurt look.[break][break]

”you really don’t remember? or are you just so ashamed for some reason that you won’t admit that it happened?”[break][break]

[attr="class","olivertop"]

[attr="class","oliver"] it was working. wils always had a way of making him feel better, even when'd he fucked things up beyond imagination.

[break][break] he glances at her, face breaking into a half-smile as she brushes her thumb against his wrist, consoling him the words that he knew that he needed to hear.

[break][break] ollie sighs, running a hand through his hair. "i know. i know you're right - i just, i don't know if it's that i'm afraid of the kiss, what it means, or about our friendship - "

[break][break] was he afraid of GIDEON GRAVES? was he afraid of the kiss?

[break][break] was he afraid of what PENELOPE LIVY might think if she found out?

[break][break] 'you aren't together,' an insidious voice inside his head whispered. 'she'd rather fuck matias than even look your way.'

[break][break] ollie blinked when willow atkins admitted that she had never questioned her sexuality. not that he'd ever really been surprised... he was pretty sure that he'd never seen her look at girls the way that he looked at -

[break][break] "you really don’t remember? or are you just so ashamed for some reason that you won’t admit that it happened?"

[break][break] his head whips around to stare.

[break][break] not at the delicious pancake batter that his fellow ranger captain has whipped up.

[break][break] it doesn't even have to do with the rugged way that boruta maher looks in the daytime, enough to make plenty of girls' heads turn.

[break][break] it didn't even have to do with the way he looked shirtless in the morning, dappled sunlight shifting through the atkins' windows.

[break][break] his throat felt dry.

[break][break] "i... what?"

[break][break] and it was then, all of a sudden, memories came rushing back. the dimly lit bar after splashfest, the sound of idle chitchatter in the distance as they knocked back two microbrews. promises of sky-diving in kalos. deep laughter. the flash of a rougish smile, hands tangled, swollen lips.

[break][break] it wasn't the bar at new years, where he'd gone home with wils.

[break][break] there was a version of this story where ollie could've gone home with bo.

[break][break] a flush suddenly surged rapidly through ollie's neck, as he ripped his hand away from willow's grip, instead to turn fully towards bo.

[break][break] "we kissed."

[break][break] "at splashfest."

[break][break] "at the bar."

[break][break] he was bright red.

[attr="class","ooc"] willow atkins boruta maher

☉

willow's pretty good at reading the back of bo's neck so she notices, as she's talking, that his shoulders stiffen, that he looks uncomfortable. or like something's bothering him. and she attributes it just to the awkward situation at hand, thinks maybe he might share some sentiments that samuel does, but - 

wait, what?

ollie says each line and one after the other, her stomach does little flips. her brows furrow. she doesn't know what she feels as it settles, only that it's a lot. 

and bo looks so hurt. why does he look so hurt?

"you two...? ollie, you...? i..." she draws her hand back. she stands up. she sits down. she looks away from ollie's bright red face and she looks anywhere but at bo and she chews her lip.

her best friend? he kissed her best friend? who is ollie? who is a man? the same best friend who kissed her after she tried to console him when penny broke his heart for the millionth time? 

boruta maher ollie morales

☉