when chu-e asked about the lip gloss he had to look over to see which one he was talking about because he had a lot of them. "oh yeah that brand is great, and if you put it on a solid surface and then rub a piece of paper over it then it'll pick up fingerprints." it was fashionable and a tool. "plus it smells like caramel." so that was always a good thing too. having all four of the galar fossils in the same room felt like a weird dream come true. he really wanted to have them all on his team at one point. but of course getting a hold of galar fossils around here were fucked odds. but he didn't really give a shit about odds on a normal basis.

"Like, I don't think we have enough parts to put them together properly like... What fucking head belongs on Jerky's fat ass?" It was super hard to figure out what went where when he wasn't even sure what part belonged to what creature. He wasn't a fucking scientist or anything. All he knew was eat hot chip, steal and lie.

Chu-e Choi

Name: glitch maverick

Pokemon 1: Golisopod
Pokemon 2: Zweilous

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so what if he showed up a little bit on the late side? and so what if there was a bunch of shit going on that involved some people that weren't him getting rewards or whatever. if you needed to have a shadow pokemon to kick ass then how strong could you really be? how strong could you like... actually be? it didn't add up. it didn't make sense. if you were already a badass why did you need some hyper ass freak pokemon to be even stronger? it was fucking stupid. but whatever. he was supposed to be on 'good behavior' whatever the hell that meant.

but how good could his behavior be when the snacks sucked and he wasn't allowed to rob people blind at a rocket event? he was bored and hungry and really that was probably the worst combination of things. until of course darkrai showed up. that was at least a little bit interesting. climbing up on top of bug-juice to get a better look he couldn't suppress one of his nearly manic giggles at the idea of fighting whatever the fuck that thing was.

tapping the goliospod on the top of his shell he urged it a little bit. "fuck that thing up bug-juice!" this was more exciting than anything he was expecting really. "fuck it up!" bug-juice reciprocates the request by sending a pin missile at the dark type legendary.

glitch is just, chilling and not wanting to ruin his boots with this bullshit tbh, he wants to drop kick darkrai with his gucci boots settles on using pin missile instead

slushie obviously didn't care that it was an abomination to nature and that it needed to be hand fed in order to survive. it just liked being able to have food flung into it's mouth as it munched away on the chips. it was having a good time and that was fine. after all as long as it does it's duty glitch didn't care how many bags of chips he had to give it.

glitch was more excited to see whatever chu-e was going to pull out of his bag. especially if he had two of the other fossils that were not in his collection yet. he always wanted to see more of these freaks of nature. he didn't have either of the ones that chu-e had and that was fine because he had two that the underboss didn't have.

"hold on let me find it." he dug around in his bag some, pretty much dumping it out on the table as he looked for the pokeball labeled 'jerky'. more lipgloss than anything fell out but finally he found it and pressed the button. "it's a dracozolt and he's got some fat fucking legs." jerky was obviously more used to being out of it's pokeball and was more alert than slushie seemed to be. but that was fine. "behold, galar's finest fuck ups." but he loved them regardless.

Chu-e Choi

haha holy fucking shit it was a dinosaur motherfucker. glitch was way more concerned about the fact that it was really hard to get a picture of the danger lizards that were flying around right now than the fact that he was probably the perfect size for a snack or whatever. he wanted to get a selfie with one of the shits but of course, that seemed like it was going to be impossible. they didn't really land or whatever they just, flapped their big ass wings and ruined people's day. just like he would do if he had wings. evolution really fucking screwed humans over or whatever.

pissed off he decided the best way he was going to get a really good fucking picture would be to catch one. of course that meant actually trying but he supposed he could sacrifice a little for the sake of instagram. the shit he was willing to do, honestly. with a swift chuck of his pokeball he wondered if he was actually going to hit one of the barenaked ass chickens flying around. if he didn't he wouldn't be mad. he would just harass someone who actually did manage to catch one for a picture.

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