“No idea, but I can definitely tell you that shit ain’t normal!”

She was going far too slow for her liking—what with the rain of ruined and shredded treetops raining down all around them, she really had nothing else to it so she pulled out a battered, scuffed Friend Ball and out popped her Braviary from the burst of red light, a loud squawk of alarm as he emerged amidst the rain of the debris.

“Yeah, Sora, GO!” she hollered as she literally threw herself on the Braviary’s back, and hung on for dear deer life as the avian Pokémon took to the skies, but staying low and flying as well out of range as possible from those snapping mandibles—

The Durant let out an angry screeching, skittering noise, like it was attempting to call a swarm of its own kind to their current location a few moments afterward.

“Go, go, go!” she yelled as she flattened herself on the back of said Braviary as they slashed through the jungle growth.

Where were they heading, she had no idea—however the idea of putting as much space between themselves and this damned-ass kaiju-sized bug as possible was the current objective!

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14: encounter gigantic bug-type pokemon that will attempt to ensnare, hunt, or kill you. (where to next lesgo)

Okay so she was hoping to find something at the very least useful for her husband’s research but—she wasn’t expecting to tumble out into a completely alien, different reality entirely!

Was this…was this like the time he mentioned that before Mount Chimney blew its shit some time ago they’d somehow ended up in ‘another’ Hoenn? Was it something like that?! Either way…

She pinched the bridge of her nose before realizing they couldn’t just be standing around!

“Goes without saying to keep your eyes and ears peeled for—” she began before the low, distant rumbling started. They—they weren’t out in an open field, were they?

It was consistent, at first, at least until—

A massive shadow engulfed most of the entire place where she was standing and she thought to turn around and look and saw that there was—

A completely massive pair of pincers snapping the air overhead, ominous crackling from its burnished form literally making its entire body shimmer.

Oh, hell—

“Don’t tell me we’re in some kind of Jackass like reality show! RUN!” she yelled, realizing that there was a kaiju-sized Durant approaching them and fast, mandibles clicking menacingly and easily snapping off treetops in half.

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14: encounter gigantic bug-type pokemon that will attempt to ensnare, hunt, or kill you.

Thankfully, the one they were looking for finally made an appearance, although she had to blink a couple of times because her Swampert almost stepped on the danged thing due to how small it was!

What the hell?!

Before she could say anything, though, the Tatsugiri lashed out with a Water Pulse attack that made the Swampert cringe as he got hit—only to attempt to retaliate with a Hydro Pump but realizing that instead of getting hit, it was… absorbing the effect?!

“No, don’t wet it!” she yelped, bracing herself because there were only two possibilities that would follow: one involved an avalanche of boulders, and another involved violent tremors—

Speak of the devil, the Swampert huffed before punching his ‘fists’ together and causing an avalanche of multiple boulders in the form of a Rock Slide come raining down around the little… sushi-like Pokémon?!

It let out a pained squeal of shock before it tried to use Mirror Coat but it… well, you can guess how that went.

An Earthquake then shook up the nearby area, causing some of the remaining boulders to bean the Tatsugiri sideways—very nearly getting squashed flat—before she threw her fourth and final Safari Ball…

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Premium Safari, lesgo | catch attempt on Tatsugiri!

The next Pokémon was clearly too small to see, however fact of the matter was that there was an incoming flash-bang grenade of an explosion of fae light (Dazzling Gleam) that gave the Cutiefly’s position away—

“Whoa!” she yelped as she closed her eyes and braced herself against the light that went off like a thousand flash bangs set off at the same time.

“Find it and bring it here!”

The Swampert wasted no time as an avalanche of boulders in the form of a Rock Slide came crashing down, blotting out the burst of light and giving away the shape of the tiniest Cutiefly before the little dual-type retaliated with a loud, nascent buzzing of its wings in a Fairy Wind attack.

That caused her to clap her hands over her ears, cringing before another burst of hoselike water in the form of a Hydro Pump sent the Cutiefly screaming, flitting towards her way—and another Safari ball thrown.

They had to hurry it up, otherwise they’d miss the target of the day!

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Premium Safari, lesgo | catch attempt on Cutiefly!

And the next encounter would bring with it—a loud, screeching Pokémon ready to kick some fucking ass because a Pancham just dropped from out of nowhere ready with a Seismic Toss aimed at the Swampert—okay how was that going to work?!

Nonetheless, the Swampert got lifted and tossed to one side—catching both the dual-type and Izumi off-guard. Holy hellbals how did that shit happen?!

“Go, go, go!” she cheered, realizing that they were running on very short time now and literally had to bring this danged thing to heel because a certain Pokémon they were chasing may not appear for a long time again…

The Swampert then Screeched his dismay, to which the Pancham retaliated with a Low Sweep attack, knocking the Swampert off his proverbial legs so to speak.

Just before the panda Pokémon could retaliate with a close-range Slash, the dual-type countered with a hoselike jet of Hydro Pump and right into the Safari Ball she’d chucked at the incoming Pokémon who would be coming with her whether she liked it or not!

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Premium Safari, lesgo | catch attempt on Pancham!

Thankfully amidst all the chaos, her Gyarados managed to contribute and get the job done—what was surprising though was seeing Dunamus suddenly come out of nowhere, Mega Evolved to boot, and literally yeet himself with as much dispassion as the Swampert was known for—at the gigantic Huntail.

“Geez, what a mess… anyway!” she crackled over the private hubby-only line and looking towards the drenched Chocobo her better half. “You okay back there?”

Thankfully, the immediate threat has been handled—she doesn’t miss the Zigzagoon that dropped a rather large pearl in her hands before it scurried away—and then she realized that the Huntail was a gigantic anomaly of a species…

“Gimme a bit, I want to check out this whopper.”

She then made headway towards the now… pretty-much decimated Huntail and took some pictures of the beast as well. How the fuck did something grow this large, anyway? This was beyond anything she’d ever seen…

And then wondered if she’d be able to sneak something away from it, too. No harm in trying, right?

---

• Zuzu makes a crack at the big-ass Huntail, smirks at the Mega Swampert
• ooh shiny pearl why thank you little Ziggy
• she then takes out her phone camera and snaps as many pictures as she can of the anomalously-sized Huntail
• also comin’ for that looty booty

The moment the next Pokémon came charging at her from the undergrowth she had to backpedal a few moments because—

Holy shit there it was!

“Feisty, aren’t you?!” she exclaimed, pulling out a random Pokéball before tossing it forward and seeing that her Swampert had landed from the beam of red light—

And before she could as much as issue a single command the Scorbunny literally came screaming their way with a Bounce attack!

(And for some reason, it looked like it was slightly more powerful than usual?)

“Are you gonna take that lying down? No, right? Let’s get to it!”

The Swampert roared (for lack of a better term) and a sudden avalanche of boulders caught the Scorbunny by surprise a few minutes later, the effects of the Rock Slide causing the poor thing to crash toward the ground snout-first!

“Okay, no need to go overboard, but you know—” she continued as the Fire-type got up and then threw themselves at the dual-type, Flame Charging in the process—

Before a powerful, fire hose-like jet of water caught the Fire-type off-guard, face-first into the Hydro Pump and dropping to the ground soaking wet.

A Safari Ball is then chucked at it before it has the chance to get away.

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Premium Safari, lesgo | catch attempt on Scorbunny!

“I gotta tell my husband about this. Pretty sure he’s gonna lose his shit when he finds out Primeape can still evolve.”

In fact she had to contact Josh Dragomir as soon as possible and let him know that there were apparently, new forms that were out there!

(Of course she had no idea that he already had a Clodsire of his own, but of course she’d call it the brown Quagsire or something like that when she saw it.)

“Have you seen any more of the… of the new Pokémon around here?” she hummed, suddenly curious because she realized that… if there was a Fire-type amongst the new ones, she definitely had to get her hands on them as much as possible!

Right as the strange-looking Primeape leaped out of the building holding the other people they’d managed to find (followed by a Dewott no less) the Primarina put on the hose at maximum power, and so did the Inteleon—and then the sirens cut through the air; the local firemen volunteers had arrived!

“Oh, I know a better place to grab a coffee,” she continued with a grin as the Inteleon leaped like a Bond stuntman towards where they were, followed by the Primarina as she recalled both Water-types as well.

And it was off! To her family’s café no less!

Just how much fire water power was needed in order to clean a spaceship?

Well, the brochure didn’t specify a specific Water-type move, just bring something and throw it at the spaceship hanger to help hose down the spacecraft that were housed there.

And so today we would find a Sealeo waddling along, escorted by one of the employees before being pointed to a particular problem spot for it to hose down.

What, hose down? All she knew was Water Gun! Definitely nothing as powerful as Surf, or Waterfall, or even Hydro Cannon…

But even then, there was a niche for finesse-level cleaning, so here we were.

Ready, aim, and—

A precise burst of water fired by the dual-type, looking to scrub out a particularly nasty patch of dirt.

Another day’s work done!

Back outside, the Inteleon and the Primarina continued to douse the building with water, hoping that the firemen would arrive soon with their Water-types and help out with extinguishing the flames in the process.

At least they managed to keep the flames within the complex area and not have it spread outward, which was good!

When she explained how Primeape actually evolved further, she had to hit the brakes and blink.

“Wait, wait, hold up a second… Primeape can still—evolve?!” she exclaimed in a stage whisper, look of utter disbelief on her face. “How the hell is that possible?”

She—she had to contact the hubby, now. As soon as possible. As fast as she could manage! What the fresh hell?! She knew that Primeape was one and done from Mankey, so for it to become a two-stage evolution? What did she miss?

Unless… it was the doing of those distortions…

Originally she was supposed to send her tree-dragon… how the hell was the Alolan Exeggutor a Dragon-type she could not comprehend, so…

She’d been advised to deploy a Dragon-type that could fly, so there was that. Either way, off went her Salamence, flying along with the other Dragon-types and generally having a good time.

While there were some draconids that were having a contest flying up ahead, her Salamence decided to cruise along within sight of the client they were escorting…

These were strange times indeed.