the stiffness in her shoulders never subsided. she wondered briefly if there was another dragon in rocket’s midst, but decided the likelihood of one infiltrating the empire was low. still, it was something she’d be discussing soon with Cillian Quinn .

her cigarette burned, neglected, a sign of intense processing and consideration. her eyes idly passed over dorian’s, while her mind was momentarily elsewhere. it rushed back when the name of her old gang was breathed into the air, a forbidden taboo of sounds, dissonant to her ears. she felt decidedly uncomfortable, now.

lulu sipped her drink and swallowed, choosing not to react.

then, he asked for the story. typically, she wouldn’t find herself in a sharing mood, but dorian had an air of power coming off of him that compelled her to talk. she was with rocket for protection, after all.

“i fucked up, got caught.” she looked still vaguely disappointed in herself, slowly spinning the tumbler a little on its edge, staring into the crystal facets of its shape. “i was hacking a security system and they found me. still don’t know how.” she shrugged, pulling smoke from a tan filter as she momentarily paused, sighing. “so i went to prison. just got out a few weeks ago.”

she chewed on her lip a moment, not sure whether to say the next words. she felt possibly unfriendly eyes on her back, but then again, she had stronger allies, now. “i only served half my sentence and they let me out on good behavior. no tellin’ them that, though.” 'them' being the dragons. it looked bad. she hadn’t ratted anyone out, but she’d known the questions would be there. of course, by running, she’d made herself look even more suspect. it was a catch-22.

“i’m here cause i’m not dumb enough to go back.” she took another drink, sighing. dorian was the first person she’d shared this information with, aside from gavin. it felt strange.

they were some lemons, alright. she stamped out her cigarette, which had burned down mostly without her intervention. as she listened to dorian talk, however, the tension in her shoulders began to ease up. although next to him, she’d previously felt as if she were sitting alone in a way, but now, he had her back. they had her back.

lulu supposed that an organization in which she was forced to conceal her identity was one that she could not trust, but just these words alone relaxed her skepticism. lulu had trusted the dragons with her life. that was something she did miss, at times. perhaps one day, she’d feel like she was running with her own pack again.

she let the tumbler lay flat on the bar again for a moment before raising it to her lips, draining what was left in the glass and then setting it to the bartender’s side of the bartop, eyeing him as though to mean ‘fill it up, asshole.’ another thing that was ingrained in her was her sense of rivalry and distrust for outside groups. she had no niceties for the man, who begrudgingly poured the tequila, quiet.

just as she was sipping her drink, he mentioned rustboro. she nearly choked. so they’d already been here the whole time. her breathing quickened, though hardly noticeable. “that’s news.” fuck. the bartender, having been eavesdropping was perceptive of her body language and decided to comment.

‘shit, i’d be scared too.’

a second passed, no eye contact. then, lulu threw the drink back like a shot and threw the glass right past the man’s head. it hit the wall with a loud shatter. “don’t fucking talk to me.” she snarled viciously. she’d combusted nearly out the blue.

just as quickly, the fire seemed to die.
there was a distant, defeated look on her face. she removed a cigarette from her pocket and lit it. leaned back in her stool with a thousand yard stare. “i’m dead.” suddenly, any aforementioned trust went out the window. shit was too real. shouldn't've ran.

her face felt hot, and there was a strange calm that washed over her that was like a momentary acceptance of her fate. she pulled the cigarette to her lips and stared at the curved edge of the wooden bar, looking at the surfaces of a world that she felt she was seeing anew behind the eyes of a dead woman.

she listened to his words as he spoke them into the side of her ear, not looking at him. her face showed careful consideration, but she never did snap out of it. when he began relating with her, her interest was piqued, and she looked over at him, but there was new tension. as curious as she was, she didn’t want to talk any more about gangs, or rocket. she cleared her throat. “i should leave.” with that, she slid out of her seat. her eyes fell idly on the floor for a moment, but in the end, she said little more. “i'll see ya.” then, after stamping out her half-smoked cigarette, she walked out. she hadn't paid, and the bartender didn’t dare to protest.