mend these hurts

i used to dream in the dark of palisades park

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played by

dove

dr. graves
he / him
36
October 28
fallarbor town, hoenn
bisexual
museum director
professor / researcher
hardwired
allopatric isolation
6'4" / 193 cm height
6'4" / 193 cm height
i get by, but it's hard to forget in the smoke of denial and the fog of regret.
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512 posts
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TAG WITH @gideon
GIDEON GRAVES
mend these hurts
POSTED ON Jun 5, 2023 21:38:08 GMT
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"Let's grab a drink."[break][break]

A surprising request from , considering how icy the two brothers had been toward one another the past few weeks. [break][break]

But he'd shown genuine concern for Gideon's burned arm in the Ultra Crater, and now here in a Slateport Clinic, where the professor was given the 'all clear' by medical professionals to head home. His injuries were minimal, thanks to 's quick thinking.[break][break]

"Sure." He assented, knowing of a public house just down the block. They walked there in relative silence, sat at the end of the bar, and ordered their drinks with as few words as possible.[break][break]

Minutes passed. Ice clinked in glasses, murmuring from other patrons filled the space around them.[break][break]

Gideon was the one to break the silence first.[break][break]

"... Why'd you ask me here, Gunner?"




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played by

gunsmile

"Lancer"
he / him
34
September 5
Fallarbor Town, Hoenn
pansexual
paralegal / special agent
agent
6'1" / 185 cm height
6'1" / 185 cm height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
1,455 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gunner
Gunner Graves
mend these hurts
POSTED ON Jun 6, 2023 12:30:54 GMT
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Gunner was terrible at apologies. Worse than that, however, was the cold distance that dwelled between him and Gideon during these past few weeks.[break][break]

The brothers had always been close. Playing together as children, studying together as teenagers, and keeping in contact as much as possible despite years of separation. And through it all, Gunner had always admired Gideon's intelligence and ambition, even if his work ethic had devastating consequences.[break][break]

And now they hadn't spoken in weeks, all because of… what, a misunderstanding? Initially, Gunner had refused to think he'd been wrong. Wrong to keep his work a secret. Wrong to deceive his family. After all, as long as they were safe and healthy, why did it matter what happened to him?[break][break]

But 's words from their recent fight echoed in his head: "What about my feelings, Gunner?"[break][break]

Perhaps, in his effort to protect his loved ones with his life, he forgot to consider how they felt about possibly losing him one day.[break][break]

"I'm sorry I called your bugs stupid," Gunner blurted out, not sure what to say first. He stared into his glass of vodka tonic, flushing with embarrassment. "Your work is important. It's important to you, and I shouldn't have belittled it."



[attr="class","ooc"]
[attr="class","tag"]
[break]

NOTES


Mission: Poisonous Possession (B&B)



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MADE BY GUNSMILE


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played by

dove

dr. graves
he / him
36
October 28
fallarbor town, hoenn
bisexual
museum director
professor / researcher
hardwired
allopatric isolation
6'4" / 193 cm height
6'4" / 193 cm height
i get by, but it's hard to forget in the smoke of denial and the fog of regret.
awards
512 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gideon
GIDEON GRAVES
mend these hurts
POSTED ON Jun 8, 2023 22:07:47 GMT
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[nospaces]
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The fucking bugs.[break][break]

As if all his anger and worry and fear had been caused by Gunner insulting his bugs. God, he really was just like the child Gideon remembered sometimes. [break][break]

But he was trying. And that was important to .[break][break]

"No, you shouldn't have..." Agreement spoken sternly through the rim of his glass. [break][break]

"But... we were heated. I get it." Gideon had also said things he regretted, like calling his younger brother a fucking idiot. Ugh... what a mess.[break][break]

"I'm sorry, too." Glancing over, he made eye contact with .[break][break]

"...I gotta know why, Gunner. Why did you choose a life like this?"





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played by

gunsmile

"Lancer"
he / him
34
September 5
Fallarbor Town, Hoenn
pansexual
paralegal / special agent
agent
6'1" / 185 cm height
6'1" / 185 cm height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
1,455 posts
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TAG WITH @gunner
Gunner Graves
mend these hurts
POSTED ON Jun 9, 2023 18:53:59 GMT
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Gunner released the breath he'd subconsciously been holding as soon as Gideon voiced his own apology. Not that Gunner wanted to hear his brother apologize for the argument. With how much time had passed, he didn't care about being right. He just wanted to be able to talk with Gideon again, like before.[break][break]

But he did pause for a large swig of his drink before he answered Gideon's question.[break][break]

"When Sayori died, I didn't know what to do," Gunner began in a halting explanation. "I felt lost, like I'd been unmoored. I hated everything. Team Rocket. My bosses. Myself."[break][break]

He took a deep breath. It had been a long time since he'd talked about what had happened with anyone. Of course, Gideon knew the circumstances, but to discuss the events after so much time had passed felt strange.[break][break]

"I wanted to destroy something, Gideon," Gunner admitted, his voice low. The confession felt shameful, somehow. "It didn't matter what. The HBIC… they convinced me to put my urges toward a greater good."[break][break]

He took another drink.



[attr="class","ooc"]
[attr="class","tag"]
[break]

NOTES


Mission: Poisonous Possession (B&B)



[attr="class","pkmn"]




[attr="class","credit"]
MADE BY GUNSMILE


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played by

dove

dr. graves
he / him
36
October 28
fallarbor town, hoenn
bisexual
museum director
professor / researcher
hardwired
allopatric isolation
6'4" / 193 cm height
6'4" / 193 cm height
i get by, but it's hard to forget in the smoke of denial and the fog of regret.
awards
512 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gideon
GIDEON GRAVES
mend these hurts
POSTED ON Jun 11, 2023 3:17:53 GMT
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[nospaces]
[attr="class","gideon-wrap"]
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At the mention of Sayori, Gideon's expression soured into one of commiserate sadness. He remembered her, of course, and the void she'd left behind after her tragic passing. It made sense that Gunner would want to fill that emptiness with a larger purpose.[break][break]

Gideon didn't respond right away. It was a lot to process — heavier emotions than he and Gunner had likely ever shared before. He didn't want to fly off the handle as he'd done back at his apartment.[break][break]

"...Have you not destroyed enough?" If had started his career with the HBIC after Sayori's death, then it had been years of dangerous work. Was his anger and loss not sated?[break][break]

"You're putting yourself at risk every minute that you stay with the HBIC. Why continue?"





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played by

gunsmile

"Lancer"
he / him
34
September 5
Fallarbor Town, Hoenn
pansexual
paralegal / special agent
agent
6'1" / 185 cm height
6'1" / 185 cm height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
1,455 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gunner
Gunner Graves
mend these hurts
POSTED ON Jun 12, 2023 1:24:50 GMT
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"Have you not destroyed enough?"[break][break]

Gunner did not want to answer that question. He'd certainly hurt and killed many people, but enough of them? The uncertainty hung heavy in his chest, an admission he was not ready to speak out loud.[break][break]

Instead, he chose to answer Gideon's other question.[break][break]

"I like what I do." It was the truth, as shocking as it must have sounded to his brother. "I'm good at it. I feel like I have a purpose in life, like I can actually make a difference in the world we live in."[break][break]

Gunner finally raised his gaze to meet Gideon's, determined blue eyes meeting the umber ones brimming with concern.[break][break]

"And the risk is one I'm willing to take if it means preventing what happened to her from happening to you, Mom, and Dad."



[attr="class","ooc"]
[attr="class","tag"]
[break]

NOTES


Mission: Poisonous Possession (B&B)



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MADE BY GUNSMILE


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played by

dove

dr. graves
he / him
36
October 28
fallarbor town, hoenn
bisexual
museum director
professor / researcher
hardwired
allopatric isolation
6'4" / 193 cm height
6'4" / 193 cm height
i get by, but it's hard to forget in the smoke of denial and the fog of regret.
awards
512 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gideon
GIDEON GRAVES
mend these hurts
POSTED ON Jun 18, 2023 22:50:39 GMT
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Gunner was more noble than his pragmatic older brother. He'd always had this strong sense of justice about him. People were drawn to him, to the protective light he exuded like a calling beacon. As further detail came out about his ties to the HBIC, it made more and more sense to why this was the route he'd taken in life.[break][break]

Gideon's logic was more rigid in its scope, however. In his mind, he still saw running with him in the woods behind their house, catching fireflies in the dusk, spending their summers laughing and playing together.[break][break]

But Gunner wasn't a child anymore. Not someone to covet and cherish to the point of stifling his ideals. It was time for Gideon to break from that mindset.[break][break]

"...I suppose," He sighed heavily, expelling the old and allowing the new to sink in. "You're right."[break][break]

Gideon took a big swig of his drink. These were hard topics to breach, after all.[break][break]

"You've already saved my life once. And for that," He placed a meaningful hand on Gunner's forearm, looking for eye contact from his brother. "I'll never be able to thank you enough."[break][break]

"I'm proud of you, Gunner."






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played by

gunsmile

"Lancer"
he / him
34
September 5
Fallarbor Town, Hoenn
pansexual
paralegal / special agent
agent
6'1" / 185 cm height
6'1" / 185 cm height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
1,455 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gunner
Gunner Graves
mend these hurts
POSTED ON Jun 19, 2023 14:54:12 GMT
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Gideon's acceptance did not come easily. In fact, Gunner had half-expected his brother to continue resisting the truth. But Gideon was a man of science. In his field, old truths had to make way for new ones.[break][break]

But while the acceptance — and even the words of gratitude — did not come as too much of a surprise, Gideon's last words did.[break][break]

Gunner had spent the last six years humbling himself. The HBIC had told him he would not receive accolades or recognition for his work from the public he worked so hard to defend. He would toil in the shadows of the League government. Whatever pride he could take in his career would be his own to cultivate.[break][break]

So to hear "I'm proud of you" from the man he admired above all others brought unexpected emotion. Gunner flushed red. A bashful smile spread across his face. He tried to hide it with another swig of drink.[break][break]

"Thanks," he said at last, unable to avoid the conversation. Then he sighed, finally ready to apologize for the real issue at hand.[break][break]

"I'm sorry I kept it a secret from you for so long. I thought it was better if you didn't know. I didn't want you worrying about me. Mom and Dad don't know, either."



[attr="class","ooc"]
[attr="class","tag"]
[break]

NOTES


Mission: Poisonous Possession (B&B)



[attr="class","pkmn"]




[attr="class","credit"]
MADE BY GUNSMILE


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played by

dove

dr. graves
he / him
36
October 28
fallarbor town, hoenn
bisexual
museum director
professor / researcher
hardwired
allopatric isolation
6'4" / 193 cm height
6'4" / 193 cm height
i get by, but it's hard to forget in the smoke of denial and the fog of regret.
awards
512 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gideon
GIDEON GRAVES
mend these hurts
POSTED ON Jun 22, 2023 2:28:45 GMT
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[attr="class","gideon-wrap"]
[attr="class","gideon-main"]
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Gideon saw Gunner's visceral reaction, but did not comment on it. Instead he simply patted his brother's forearm before removing his hand completely, snaking it back to grasp his glass of whiskey.[break][break]

Then came the real apology. The one from 's heart, born out of concern for his family's safety and wellbeing. And it made sense. His logic was sound.[break][break]

But still, deception was deception. Lies still hurt no matter their reason.[break][break]

Gideon was already over the hump, but...[break][break]

"I'm assuming you still don't want them to know?"






[attr="class","gideon-notes"]









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played by

gunsmile

"Lancer"
he / him
34
September 5
Fallarbor Town, Hoenn
pansexual
paralegal / special agent
agent
6'1" / 185 cm height
6'1" / 185 cm height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
1,455 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gunner
Gunner Graves
mend these hurts
POSTED ON Jun 22, 2023 14:24:57 GMT
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[nospaces]
[attr="class","gunner2"]
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Uncertainty flashed in Gunner's face. For the first time, perhaps, Gideon would see the young boy he'd always known his brother to be. The doubt reflected in his voice when he spoke.[break][break]

"Yes… A lot of my work is confidential in nature, so I wouldn't be able to talk to them about it if they asked. And I don't want them to stay up at night worrying about me."[break][break]

He looked up into Gideon's eyes.[break][break]

"Unless you think that's wrong?"[break][break]

Generally, Gunner was not the kind of person to seek advice from others. He acted with the full confidence that his decisions were the right ones.[break][break]

But in moments of vulnerability, when the emotions he worked hard to contain were already pouring out, he knew of no better person to turn to than his brother.



[attr="class","ooc"]
[attr="class","tag"]
[break]

NOTES


Mission: Poisonous Possession (B&B)



[attr="class","pkmn"]




[attr="class","credit"]
MADE BY GUNSMILE


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played by

dove

dr. graves
he / him
36
October 28
fallarbor town, hoenn
bisexual
museum director
professor / researcher
hardwired
allopatric isolation
6'4" / 193 cm height
6'4" / 193 cm height
i get by, but it's hard to forget in the smoke of denial and the fog of regret.
awards
512 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gideon
GIDEON GRAVES
mend these hurts
POSTED ON Jun 25, 2023 0:43:53 GMT
GIDEON GRAVES Avatar
[nospaces]
[attr="class","gideon-wrap"]
[attr="class","gideon-main"]
[attr="class","gideon-words"]





A second swig of his drink had coming to yet another hard acceptance. [break][break]

What he decided next would make him complicit in Gunner's lies. It didn't sit right with him... but what other choice did he have?[break][break]

"It is wrong..." There was a defined conviction in Gideon's voice as he began to voice his opinion, though it soon dwindled into a nearly defeated lull.[break][break]

"...but one can only hope that the good you're doing counteracts all the lies."[break][break]

That's all could hope for at this point. Gunner was going to live his life as he saw fit, doing the work he felt was important.[break][break]

"I know you're doing what you think is right. And... truthfully, they're safer not knowing." He sighed again, meeting Gunner's eyes.[break][break]

"I won't tell them, if that's what you want."







[attr="class","gideon-notes"]









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played by

gunsmile

"Lancer"
he / him
34
September 5
Fallarbor Town, Hoenn
pansexual
paralegal / special agent
agent
6'1" / 185 cm height
6'1" / 185 cm height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
1,455 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gunner
Gunner Graves
mend these hurts
POSTED ON Jun 25, 2023 1:56:35 GMT
Gunner Graves Avatar
[nospaces]
[attr="class","gunner2"]
[attr="class","text"]

Gunner's body relaxed with relief, and he let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. "Thank you. That means a lot, for you to help me out like this."[break][break]

The discomfort and uncertainty returned to his face within moments, however. He stalled by finishing off his drink and flagging down the waiter for another. Then, when there was nothing else to do but proceed, he said to Gideon:[break][break]

"Summer doesn't know, either. And honestly, I don't ever want her finding out."[break][break]

Not just for her safety, but because Lion Heart Trading Co. was Gunner's case for the HBIC. He had no idea how she'd react if she found out the truth. Of course, that led to another complication he didn't know how to address.[break][break]

One he was desperate to voice at last.[break][break]

"She doesn't know a lot of things, actually," Gunner admitted, feeling more lost for words than when he and his brother had first arrived at the bar.



[attr="class","ooc"]
[attr="class","tag"]
[break]

NOTES


Mission: Poisonous Possession (B&B)



[attr="class","pkmn"]




[attr="class","credit"]
MADE BY GUNSMILE


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played by

dove

dr. graves
he / him
36
October 28
fallarbor town, hoenn
bisexual
museum director
professor / researcher
hardwired
allopatric isolation
6'4" / 193 cm height
6'4" / 193 cm height
i get by, but it's hard to forget in the smoke of denial and the fog of regret.
awards
512 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gideon
GIDEON GRAVES
mend these hurts
POSTED ON Jun 25, 2023 3:47:34 GMT
GIDEON GRAVES Avatar
[nospaces]
[attr="class","gideon-wrap"]
[attr="class","gideon-main"]
[attr="class","gideon-words"]



When Gunner flagged down the bartender, Gideon ordered his second drink, too. He'd need more of a buzz to endure the next part of their conversation.[break][break]

.[break][break]

"Fuck." He nearly groaned. "Of course she doesn't."[break][break]

How did do it? Lie to his loved ones so easily? Gideon couldn't even comprehend looking into the eyes of his partner every day and misleading them to such a degree.[break][break]

"What else haven't you told her, Gunner?"






[attr="class","gideon-notes"]









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played by

gunsmile

"Lancer"
he / him
34
September 5
Fallarbor Town, Hoenn
pansexual
paralegal / special agent
agent
6'1" / 185 cm height
6'1" / 185 cm height
i used to dream in the dark of palisades park.
awards
1,455 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gunner
Gunner Graves
mend these hurts
POSTED ON Jun 26, 2023 12:41:43 GMT
Gunner Graves Avatar
[nospaces]
[attr="class","gunner2"]
[attr="class","text"]

Gunner tossed back half his drink in one go. Like Gideon, he needed to be more inebriated to deal with their next topic of conversation.[break][break]

"I told her about what happened to me in Kanto, but I haven't told her about Sayori. I haven't told her about what I was going through during these past few years."[break][break]

The more he thought about it, the more it seemed knew nothing about him. Of course, she knew about his childhood and young adulthood, his family, his dreams and ambitions as a kid. But to Gunner, all that seemed a lifetime away.[break][break]

He was a different person now. He had different goals, a different perspective on life. And it all related to his work, of which she was oblivious.[break][break]

"And also, I'm starting to have doubts about what I want. I thought I liked her but…" Gunner trailed off, struggling to be vulnerable. But as the alcohol flooded his system, the looser his tongue became. "Honestly, I feel kind of trapped."



[attr="class","ooc"]
[attr="class","tag"]
[break]

NOTES


Mission: Poisonous Possession (B&B)



[attr="class","pkmn"]




[attr="class","credit"]
MADE BY GUNSMILE


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close tab

played by

dove

dr. graves
he / him
36
October 28
fallarbor town, hoenn
bisexual
museum director
professor / researcher
hardwired
allopatric isolation
6'4" / 193 cm height
6'4" / 193 cm height
i get by, but it's hard to forget in the smoke of denial and the fog of regret.
awards
512 posts
part of
TAG WITH @gideon
GIDEON GRAVES
mend these hurts
POSTED ON Jun 27, 2023 1:43:43 GMT
GIDEON GRAVES Avatar
[nospaces]
[attr="class","gideon-wrap"]
[attr="class","gideon-main"]
[attr="class","gideon-words"]




The elder Graves brother took a large swig of his drink as well. Vulnerability had never been Gunner's forte, nor Gideon's for that matter, so such a deep conversation like this was a rarity. Social lubrication was a must.[break][break]

"You kept it light. That makes sense for a newer relationship." Gideon validated, seeing reason for Gunner's omissions even without considering his ties to the HBIC. Talking about loss and the turmoil that comes after was never easy, no matter the circumstance.[break][break]

But still, it spoke to a potential lack of trust and security in the relationship. Gideon was about to voice this thought, but Gunner's next statement made him pause. [break][break]

When Gideon continued, there was a nervous edge to his voice.[break][break]

"Trapped how?"






[attr="class","gideon-notes"]









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img
The Shula Region
Hogwarts AU
RPG Unlimited
MR
The Enroi Region
N:FB
Vyrehaven
Celestial Guardians, AU Sailor Moon RP
EO GENESIS
Code and Crown: An advanced literate warriors cats RP, set in medieval times
Swords Clashing