LOVE IS A WEATHER BEATEN MAN WITH DIRTY TOENAILS

There was a question on Passerby Analytics recently, asking people: “What does the Apocalypse look like for you?”

To many, I’m sure they’ve answered with a variation on fire and brimstone. And to the point, I imagine that really would be what occurs during an actual apocalypse, which probably results in a painful and miserable death.

But, for me, an Apocalypse is the darkest event that can possibly reside. And the truest darkness wears Love for a face.

In Plato’s Symposium, the courtesan Diotima overhears Socrates and his nerd friends in a conversation about love, and steps into conversation.

Before Diotima, the entire conversation was about how Love is the greatest force and a wholly good being, the source of all things beautiful and divine.

Diotima scoffs, then denies them this entire notion.

“Love is not beautiful.” Diotima says, “Do not confuse Love with Beauty.”

“What then, do you think Love is?” Socrates asked.

“I will tell you.” Diotima replies.

“On the day that the goddess Beauty was born, a great feast was held at Mount Olympus to celebrate the occasion.

Upon the feast, the Goddess of Poverty, approached mortal son of the God of Invention: Contrivance.

Poverty had previously seen Contrivance whittle fine engravings into the simple wooden cups of the wine, and thus wanted her child to have his skill. When Contrivance went to sleep that night, Poverty lay with him, and conceived Love.

Love was therefore born at the same time as Beauty. Since Love understood Beauty from his mortal father Contrivance, and constantly felt starved from his mother, Poverty, Love became a devoted servant to Beauty, hopelessly following it around, conveying maelstroms of wind where he goes.

Far from the beautiful, divine being that many believe Love is, his true character is that of an ugly, elderly man, adorned with hideous pink, sitting atop a cloud. He is poor, weather beaten, homeless and forever travelling.

From his mother, he lives in want, never satisfied with what he obtains. But from his father, he is always scheming, designing and thinking of how to possess Beauty.”

There is of course more to the story, a separation between Divine and Vulgar Love. But for the purpose of my explanation, this will suffice.

So, why am I writing about this?

Because I want to dispel the notion that comfort, stability and happiness are the precursors to Love. That love somehow completes you, makes you whole. On the contrary, Love should not be confused with the object of love’s appreciation, Beauty.

Love is the wound you feel divesting the part of yourself to another person. It is the hunger you feel when you find yourself lacking. And it is an inherent condition of being human.

No one is able to be in love if they feel wholly satisfied. We are forever a broken coin, attempting to look for others to be pieces of us, to be fully complete.

Do not force the need to feel complete onto others. Find in yourself what is beautiful, and recognise that no matter how confident or capable another seems, they too have the same condition as you do.

Easier said than done, however.

See you in the next concert!

PASSERBY ANALYTICS HQ #6

answered in-character & anonymously

SURVEY #1
"What is your favorite way to travel?"

• Flying, beyond a doubt.

SURVEY #2
"What have been your missed opportunities in life so far?"

• I should have fired hot sauce at people in Splashfest instead of ketchup.

SURVEY #3
"What’s the best and worst relationship advice you've ever received or given?"

• The best I’ve ever received was to listen in order to understand people, instead of listening so you have something to say.

SURVEY #4
"Is the person you are now, the person you wanted to be when you were younger?"

• When I was six i didn’t think I’d live past twenty.

SURVEY #5
"Have you told your loved ones that you care about them recently? If not, why?"

• Roman Keating has the answer.

SURVEY #6
"What is your go to karaoke song?"

• All We Are by One Republic.

SURVEY #7
"How have your parents shaped you? For better or for worse."

• I think regardless of good or bad, they were doing what they could at the time.

SURVEY #8
"What would you say to a deceased member of your Pokemon team if you had the opportunity?"

• I would tell them that I miss them dearly. I would tell them that they made me happier every day. That I wish I had realised how short our time together would be. That they made me into a better person. And that it’ll just be a while longer before I’m there with them.

SURVEY #9
"What do you think about when you're alone?"

• ”Holy shit I’m tired.”

SURVEY #10
"Tell me about a time when you truly felt safe?"

• When I first got my check after the Splashfest tour: I sat down in my apartment, my rent fully paid until the next year, and bought a stupid amount of takeout. To this day I associate financial freedom with fried chicken and nausea.

SURVEY #11
"Would you save our universe, even if it meant that all other universes would be destroyed?"

• I don’t really care for the universe itself, just the handful of people inside of it that I like.

SURVEY #12
"Gut check: do you expect people to act in their own self-interest or in the interest of others?"

• People act in the interest of others much more than they often realise.

SURVEY #13
"If someone really wanted to hurt you right now, what should they do?"

• Man I’d be so hurt if someone gave me a 4 week luxury cruise vacation and a full set of mint condition original Pokémon TCG first edition trading cards.

SURVEY #14
"Do you believe in the afterlife?"

• Yes.

SURVEY #15
"What would the apocalypse look like or feel like for you?"

• The apocalypse looks like 3 people: A beautiful brunette in a silk white dress, a child with black and silver striped hair, and Tony. They are happily singing some stupid ad chime in Unova during breakfast.

SUGGESTIONS?
"Do you have a suggestion for a future survey question? Please submit it below."

• How are you doing right now?