[attr="class","samjermain"]With the hit of the Aerial Ace, Calpurnia grinned. A bit of encouragement was called down to him from her little soap box. “What a good boy, Purrsy!” The feline just stared back with a look best described as mild disdain. But he was bathing in the praise. Momma could tell.

Out of range of most of the Sharpedo—and immune to their crunches—the cat watched as the sharks drew nearer with bated breath. He hoped to see a chunk taken out of the ghost. He was curious what color it would bleed. Instead, with some ectoplasmic nonsense, it disappeared from the middle of the hoard. With a series of fleshy thumps, the trio of sharks crashed into one another. Their fangs tore at corrupted flesh as they added injury to their embarrassment.

What stupid, bullish creatures. Calpurnia thought huffily as the brawl started. It would be beautifully feral if it was not so annoying. "Ooooooh~<3" The sight of the Shadow Luxray drew a delighted gasp. “Someone's a naughty boy!” The ultimate in sacrilege to some, Shadow Pokemon were an interesting subspecies. Kelpie quite enjoyed them. A true treatise on the power of sacrifice and limits.

Taking an opportunity where she saw one, the woman unleashed a Pokemon off the edge of her seat. From the other side of the rock, a Sharpedo emerged with angry, hungry eyes. This creature drew closer to the Luxray with a Shadow Sneak. Its teeth glowing with a violet lie—which could be mistaken for a crunch—the ‘shark’ moved to take a chunk out of the Luxray’s tail. Its eyes were filled with almost goblin-like mirth.

The other Sharpedo, hit by the electric attack, retreated for a moment. Their teeth gnashed.

[attr="class","samjerpoke"]

[attr="class","samjermain"]
In the lab, she regularly interacted with \Nihelego. Any fear she felt at the sight of one faded after the first few encounters. Like jellyfish, they were almost completely devoid of grey matter. There was little to fear from them. The realm itself may be dangerous, but her ability to stay calm kept most predators at bay. Sharks went after those who flailed at the water’s top, typically. Something still in the water likely did not taste good.

At his declaration, Calpurnia laughed. The sound echoed around the cavern, the bell-like sound’s echoes quickly making it unnerving. “Ah, an honest man.” Calpurnia purred. “What a rarity.” Any amusement ended however when the brute launched an attack at her boo-boo bear. For a moment, the beautiful face twisted with rage. “Hitting first?! What a nasty thing to do.” With a flip, she landed on the spire nearest her friend. Though not wobbling in the air was difficult. “Purrsy. Teach that renaissance goth some manners.”

A smile appeared as she turned toward the distant part of the cavern. Attracted by the blood, a horde of Sharpedo
The cat jumped away from the Ceruledge. A yowl tore from his throat as the blade tore through his front ruff—shedding thick fur and a few extra drops of the red stuff. This he moved to splatter across the damnable specter’s face. His blue eyes narrowed irritably. With a hiss, he dove in with an Aerial Ace, all eight front claws slashing at the ghost-type. A cough from his trainer drew his eyes to the right.

With a surge from his back legs, he evaded the charge of the first Sharpedo. Its Crunch aiming to take the Ceruledge’s helmet with it.


Almost bored by the barbarity, Calpurnia sank onto the top of her pillar.

Notes

• +10 MP for post

[attr="class","samjerpoke"]

[attr="class","samjermain"]The elder of the two chirped, “I am sure we shall.” Calpurnia knew questioning another’s work was wise, but it stil did not make it being done any less irritating. Especially when she had been doing this sort of work longer than Shizue had been alive. Allowing the woman to survey her work—confident it would be satisfactory—the violet-haired vixen turned her attention toward the horizon.

“Wow.” Everything around them was lit up like the remnants of a fireworks show. It really is beautiful. The light came not from some artfully applied gunpowder, however. It was the effect of a hundred battles below. The light and glimmer of a terastal crystal. The blinding light of a Z-move or desperate mega evolution. As Shizue proofed her work, one manicured hand dropped to her feline companion’s head. “It’s stunning.” Hopefully her babies and besties would come out all right.

Calpurnia smiled. “Desperate times. Desperate measures, hm?” Testing could be damned in a situation like this. Though, in truth, she thought it could be damned in all situations. “Few things are as effective as a trial by fire.” At the question about birds, the woman chuckled. “No, no. It is a Hoennian turn of phrase.” Kelpie smiled, turning to give Shizue her full attention. ”I was thinking we could pass this formula to a few more science checkpoints.” It would make synthesis easier. “The more the merrier, right?” And, in the case of the league, the deader.

“Though we could try sending it via passenger Pidove.” She chuckled, almost tauntingly. Though, the second she said it, the more effective the idea seemed to be. Airwaves were a lot easier to break into and pass to some opposing egghead.

NOTES

• +10 MP for post

[attr="class","samjerpoke"]

[attr="class","samjermain"] At the demand, a slim pink brow lifted. Slim arms lifted to fold across her chest, the cat at her feet lashing his tail. She certainly did not look like a Rocket. She had even procured this ugly little outfit. But his initial snap wasn’t the end of it.

Ah. What a rude little boy. It was no wonder he was all alone with no thunder cat to keep him warm at night. Instead of responding with a scratching quip, Calpurnia merely smiled. “And if I don’t?” Gym leaders weren’t the ones who did the heavy lifting. Their muscles weren’t rippling in the open air as they threw blows. It’d be actually interesting if it was. She might even tune in.

Tsking beneath her breath, Calpurnia continued her strange pantomime. “If this is how you treat a friend, I shudder to think what you would do to an enemy.” She jingled her charm with a soft, alluring smile. “Your mother must be ashamed.” If one of her boys ever talked to a lady that way—especially one old enough to be their mother, they would get more than a slap outside the head. Certainly no toys or Pokemon for a couple of weeks.

“Honestly, you act like there aren’t a hundred ways through this cavern.” Kelpie huffed. “It is not like I am a Snorlax.” She put a lot of effort into keeping her body trim, thank you. That was why she could still share her daughter’s wardrobe.

That route—and that stupid ending—really made her want to wipe the floor with this silly little muffin. Not that she really battled often. Nor was she particularly skilled at it. She mostly trusted the vicious beasts to do what instinct demanded—with a little bit of strategy tossed in. Right now, she was just stalling until she came up with one of those.

Notes

• +10 MP for post

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[attr="class","samjermain"]“Do you?” Calpurnia inquired of the man below her. She gave a lazy backstroke bringing her closer to the source of his voice’s echo. Movement from in front of her—like glass shifting in water—caught her violet gaze. An elegant hand reached out, almost ghosting across the Nihilego’s tentacle as it swirled its way across the cavern. She faked a sniffle. “Such a big, strong man, scared of little old me?” A good idea in fact. This cougar had claws.

Crocodile tears now? Was this woman a whole darn menagerie? “Am I really so frightening?” She lifted her tooth-shaped necklace to her hand. “I really should—ow!” A point dug into her skin, a few drops of crimson falling through the air to the walkway below. These she waved away irritably, like a mosquito. The cat at her side rolled his eyes, finally putting some effort into propelling himself downward. Digging his claws into the top of a stone spire, Perseus righted himself. He preferred being regal to looking like a cat on a leash.

From his perch, he resembled a certain leonine Disney villain—just without a facial deformity. His spring tails waved back and forth with obvious irritation. One paw lifted as he licked at his claws.

Thomas’s next words drew a laugh. “Are you trustworthy?” The crimson swam in the air between them. Not such a big deal on its own. But, to the observant, it was enough to cause a shift in the patrolling Sharpedo in the water.

Notes

• +10 MP for post

[attr="class","samjerpoke"]

[attr="class","samjermain"]The caves echoed with the sounds of battle. Crystals lit up like fireworks—though refraction made it difficult to tell just where the battles were coming from. While others shouted and gritted teeth, the scientist looked as if she was taking a walk through a roadside zoo. Instead of powerful trainers, she saw balding bears with Russian circus scars. What a vicious, feral battlefield.

With her mask exchanged for a league regulation helmet—courtesy of a very attractive corpse—she was able to weave between the league’s lines mostly unnoticed. Her fellow Rockets, meanwhile, recognized Purrseus and his telltale collar. A designer backpack was slung over her shoulders. In it were notes from her encounters this evening and a few valuables she’d picked up. A strange charm—violet and shaped like a shark tooth—hung from her bangle. “Through here, Pursy.” Calpurnia murmured as she guided them into a quieter tunnel.

When the pair emerged, it was into a mid-sized cavern. The stalactites above made navigating by air a dangerous experience. A number of large rock pillars constrained movement—giving little room to build up speed and momentum. But none of these drew her immediate attention. That honor went to the dark-haired man at the room’s center. A vague sense of recognition tickled her synapses. Ah, yes. The god stalker. What was it he called himself?

Ah, yes! It was a nickname she gave to her first college boyfriend. The one with a hare trigger and zero idea how to make a woman purr. Dark lips curled up at their edges.


“Well, well.” Calpurnia cooed at him as she confidently made her way across the stony cavern. “If it isn’t the Master of Faster.” Aside from his disturbing obsession and hypocritical do-gooder nature, the gym leader was quite attractive.

Judging by his face, Purrseus did not agree.

Notes

• + 50 MP for Start
• + 10 MP for Post

[attr="class","samjerpoke"]

[attr="class","samjermain"]For hours, they’d slaved away at the table in hopes of cracking a particularly challenging nut. Apparently some silly little Leaguer had found a way to mitigate a few of their more insiduous weapons. It really made her quite testy.

So, to prove her poisons still had a place in this conflict, the scientist was doing her best to find a workaround. It reminded her of evolution on steroids. The Ekan’s poison grew more potent. The Yungoos slowly evolved resistance to it. The war continued ad infinitum. Truly beautiful. And something humans had lost a need for far too long ago.

Calpurnia stared down at the field lab, violet eyes hawk-like in their observations. A smile curled her lip as she pulled the newest batch of science from its reservoir. A quick trip to the microscope confirmed her earlier suspicions. A vicious smile twisted the elder woman’s plumb lips as she pushed the repurposed camping chair back from the rickety table. “I think we have it, Shizue.” Calpurnia announced to her companion as she stood up.

From his napping place, Perseus rose with a toothy yawn. His two-toned eyes turned critically to the other scientist as he padded over to her. On his heels, Calpurnia followed with pronounced clicks of her heels. Violet eyes flickered to a nearby communication tower as the purple-haired woman sat down on Shizue’s desk. “Well, love.” Shapely legs crossed. “I believe it is time for you and I to be little birdies.” A paper—recently printed out—was clutched in the elder woman’s claws. Written on it was a chemical formula. Though many people would think it Greek.

Hopefully, no silly little bootlickers were listening in.

Notes

• + 50 MP for thread start
• + 10 MP for Post

[attr="class","samjerpoke"]

[attr="class","samjermain"]The elder of the two, Kelpie’s Charizard stared down at the whippersnapper with a near. One that was made less intimidating by the fact that his eyepatch matched his trainer’s outfit—pink and all. It even had a little heart on it. “Grrrr.” It rumbled at the younger dragon as the beast took to the air. It turned its blue eyes to one of its tormentors, the urge to battle screaming in its veins. Smoke poured from its nostrils as it stood neutered, claws balled into tight little fists.

Again, he acted like she was some silly damsel. She’d dealt with worse than this in high school. A fact that many women would echo. “I assure you I have no intention of getting in your way.” Especially since they were going in the same direction. “But I am also not a child, Gerry.” What gave him the idea he could control her when he could not control his sister most days, Calpurnia did not know.

With a melodramatic sigh, Calpurnia let her head fall back. Violet eyes lifted to the sky as she noticed the Salamence’s trainer hot on its owner's heels. Another dragon—a Hydra thing—clutched between his muscular thighs. Points for handsomeness. More detracted for his silly childhood obsession with dragons. “But if it will help you feel more like a man, I’ll just twiddle my nails and let you get ambushed.” Offended by no small amount, the vindictive woman decided to do exactly as ordered.

Until her nephew begged for her assistance. Sometimes it took a bit of pain to learn a lesson. “Mel, baby. Come away from there.” The dragon turned with a look of befuddlement, its flaming tail lashing like that of an irritable cat. What the fuck, lady? his eyes said. But, remembering what she’d help do to his eye, the fire-type took a few reluctant steps backward.

The Hydreigon roared. Its trainer—requesting surrender from the masked individuals—slid off his dragon’s back.

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[attr="class","samjermain"]Watching her recent discoveries being put to devastating use tickled Kelpie in all kinds of places. While poison burning off faces was certainly grotesque, it was beautiful in both savagery and brutality. Currently out of her own personal stockpile—with her nephew off playing soldier elsewhere—the scientist retreated into the alienness of the Ultra Deep Sea. While waiting for the fighting outside to die down, she may as well get work done.

A former member of the swimming team, she felt comfortable in this place of upside-down gravity. Each kick of her legs bringing her in whatever direction she wanted—the typical rules of physics be damned. The heavyweight cat beside her didn’t seem as pleased. Laying on his side, he just allowed the winds to carry him. Whether by luck or happenstance, those currents kept him within paw’s reach of his master’s heeled boots.

Calpurnia convinced herself she enjoyed the realm on its own merits. That part of her affection did not come from it being the site of her missing husband’s last mission. Some part of her hoped he’d just pop up again. Save her from all the drudgery of playing mommy and keeping house. And, of course, him reminding her why she’d kept him around longer than the rest. But, for now, she just drifted amongst the Nihelego, admiring the translucent beasts. A notebook in her hand was quickly filled with scrawl as she let the ideas flow.

New weapons and abominations to push human evolution. Items designed to make a world without Pokemon—or most Pokemon—a reality. Things that would make people the true inheritors of the Earth. You’d think peons would be grateful.

Suddenly, Perseus jerked his head up. A rumble drew Calpurnia’s attention to the ground below. Ah, why did people have to ruin this. Did no one teach them to knock on the doors of interplanetary portals? Flipping so she was on her belly, the scientist smiled at her unseen intruder. “Why skulk around, darling?” A purr emerged from her chest, as dangerous as honeyed nightshade. “The aether’s fabulous.”

Her pen dropped from her fingers to the path below, its crystal handle sparkling in the dim light.

Notes

• +50 MP for thread start
• +25 mention Ultra Beast
• +10 per post

[attr="class","samjerpoke"]

[attr="class","samjermain"]While she considered herself above menial labor, Kelpie knew there were times one needed to dirty one’s hands. If Team Rocket failed in their attempts to collect seal stones, her mission of surpassing the gods would be more complex. Then, of course, the do-gooders at the League would swoop in like righteous eagles, tearing all of her work apart. The ultimate irony, she supposed. It was barbaric they said, but they still used some things inspired by her work.

They did not mind progress, they just did not want to pay the price to get it. Calpurnia was. That is why she was here. Not silly enough to stroll out unaccompanied—fancying herself a noble lady in need of an escort—her violet eyes flickered from face to face in hopes of a palatable partner. Then, she spotted someone familiar. She knew that mask. His slouch kindled up feelings of paranoia. Not caring about blowing her own disguise, Calpurnia strolled toward her nephew. “Ger-Bear! Look at you!” Kelpie cooed with no small amount of warmth. “You look like a little action figure! Trying to be all big and bad!”

Even with her own mask in place, the mockery on her face was impossible to miss.

After the typical introduction—which included suffocating him in her chest—Kelpie turned to the mission at hand. The box, which included some very important research documents, was given to her Dracovish to hold on to. Partially because it was a powerful menace. Partially because she cared not one iota if it died.

When the battle began, Kelpie rocked back on her heels with a smile. She gave him a squeeze. Stepped forward instead of back. For all his grumbling and gruffness, he really did care. “Aw! My hero!” A smile appeared as he tossed out a Charizard. “I have one of those things now too! Lab was going to terminate it. But he—” She tossed a Pokeball out. A large lizard roared to life. One of its eyes was gone, its entire body covered in scars. “--had some utility left.”

Another ball was tossed out, revealing a Mr. Rime. The glint in his eyes was just as dangerous as those in Calpurnia’s. The tapping of his dance echoed throughout the rift. “Do use my darlings how you want.” Not that she wouldn’t interfere of course. Gerry might be a tough little hedgehog but strategy, well, that was best left to someone with brains.

An enemy Salamence dove for the Dracovish and it's box. Kelpie looked at her nephew, seemingly unconcerned.

Notes

• +50 MP for thread
• +10 MP for post

[attr="class","samjerpoke"]

[attr="class","samjermain"]Aww! He really was just a feral little cat! All grumpy hisses and arched back whenever someone showed him the teensiest bit of affection. It made her want to amp things up a little bit. Then again, she detested people who resisted her. Still, the poor dear was here to help her. Perhaps it was best not to frighten him away.

With some reluctance, she released Gerry from her embrace. As always, the hint of a pout was apparent. A look that somehow said, ‘leaving so soon?’ without a single decibel. Violet eyes did sparkle, however, when she noticed the dot of red she’d left behind. It brought some much-needed color to her nephew’s dour, sallow little face. Not that she would breathe a word about it. Poor baby boy—such a sensitive soul.

At his protest, one manicured brow went up. A critical gaze swept up and down his form, confirming her earlier suspicions. Her honey dumpling had no idea how to dress. Did he not know that goths stopped being cute at 16 or 17? Voice brimming with disbelief, she posed a question. “Is that right?” They likely both knew it wasn’t. “I really think you would look good in pink. It’d soften all of those—” She waved her hand at him in a vague fashion, not quite sure how to summarize his prickly cactus demeanor. “--edges.”

When he asked why she’d summoned him, like he minded. Calpurnia smiled. But it was not a kind gesture. It indicated bad things, whether that meant chores or a scolding was hard to tell. “I need help getting cupcakes ready for the office party tomorrow!” She sighed. “Without your uncle here—” She sniffed. Dabbed at her dry lashes. “--it is hard to make room for all these silly little things.” The woman moved to take Gerald’s coat, closing the door behind him. Cutting off his escape. Trapping him here.

She moved to take his coat. If allowed, she would move to grasp and squeeze his tense shoulders. “I need a big strong man to bake some cupcakes.” Hopefully, with two of them, they could get the job done.

[attr="class","samjerpoke"]

[attr="class","samjermain"]Watching his trainer with a cool gaze, Purrseus offered ‘moral support.’ Which, judging by his demeanor, had nothing to do with concern or empathy. Instead, it consisted of looking exasperated and bored while maintaining the look of someone who’d just been hit by a frying pan.


With a scowl, Calpurnia tossed the boots into the nearby undergrowth. There, they flopped. Unbeknownst to her, one of the rocks they hit was anything but. With surprisingly harsh movements, the woman examined her ankle. Though she made a living trying to break body plans, she knew the proper means of assembly. Fortunately—for this tree—nothing appeared to be broken. It would bruise. It would hurt. But she would finish this silly walk.


The sound of the young man rushing through the undergrowth brought Calpurnia to her feet—her injured foot balanced like a ballerina in pirouette. Something she’d never gotten to experience. Her parents were too poor to actually enrich their children. And thus, if she hadn’t clawed out of the pit herself, too trapped to break the cycle. But that was neither here nor there. Taking a deep breath, the scientist put on a soft, friendly expression. At her feet, Purrseus glared angrily at Ito. His springy tail swished irritably behind him.


“Yes, yes.” Calpurnia cooed. One manicured hand lifted to bat away the tension. “I just took a tumble over a silly little tree root.” Her violet eyes lifted to the young man’s. Up went a pink brow. “Though I think I should be the one asking, love.” She shook her head. “You look like you swallowed a Toxicroak.” Though that phrase was silly. Doing that would likely kill you, not leave you with a sour face. “Didn’t your mom tell you your face would stick that way? Tsk. Tsk.”


Beneath her boots, yellow tendrils emerged. But this didn’t hold her attention as much as the little black shape she saw dart into a bush. A Salandit! She had been after one of these for eons! Its hormones—and their ability to endear those who smelled them—would make for excellent mind control. Hopefully, this one was useful (i.e. female). No longer caring about the pristine state of her stockings,Calpurnia planted her foot firmly. “Purrseus.”


The cat grabbed a Pokeball in her tail, tackling the little lizard with every one of its pounds. The sounds of battle ensued, its beefy mitts drawing squeals of panic from the little lizard. Knowing her little boo-boo would get the job done—he always did—she turned to the silly interloper. “What brings you all the way out here, sweet stuff?” She grinned coyly. “Cougar hunting?”

---

Catching the Salandit!

[attr="class","samjerpoke"]

[attr="class","samjermain"]The scientist’s knowledge of Elise’s approach came long before Elise announced herself. The impending company first announced itself in her Pokemon’s behavior. The Vivillon at her side slowed its wingbeats, raising slightly higher. Powder began to gather in the anxious bug’s hands. Purrseus, meanwhile, wrinkled his little nose in distaste. An annoyed grumble tumbled from his mouth. Lowering her fanciful binoculars, Calpurnia tutted at the pair. “Now, now, is there any reason to be rude?” The cat lifted a haughty snout. "What a sour whiskers you are."

An indulgent sigh passed from Calpurnia’s lips as she gently ruffled the feline’s ears. Asking her boo-boo to play nice was like asking a Hoppip to be grounded. For her part, Kelpie did not mind the idea of a stranger’s approach. It could prove amusing. And, even if it did not, a simple conversation would not kill her. Slowing slightly, she allowed Elise time to draw even with the group. “I do not own the path, my dear. Intrude away.” Not Pokemon company, of course. Animals could never quite scratch the itch that a person did. Those who let them were sick, sick puppies.

“I’m Kelpie, but my friends call me auntie.” Her enemies called her a madwoman. She gestured to the cat at her side. All of the walking left him irritable. Normally pristine fur was slick with sweat and dotted by dirt and leaves. “This gorgeous specimen is Purrseus.” Notably, she did not mention the other Pokemon Keeping track of one of the beasts was bad enough.

Above them, a Dustox swooped through the clearing. While a stunning creature, it seemed far too close to the one at her side. “What sort of evolutionary hiccup produces eyes like—” The noise sent a little plant scurrying out of the bushes. She knew this one. "Come to mommy, you mycelium menace."

It was quite useful in psychiatric settings. Which, in her line of work, meant it had a few potential assignments. “I do believe we have a new friend. Purrseus.” With a glower, the cat jumped for the mushroom, pinning it beneath two glowing paws.

Chink! The ball bounced off its head with a clumsy, unceremonious noise.

---

Catching the Morelull!

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