Are you even? Sure, you could have killed her, but you didn't. Meanwhile, she was actively trying to kill you, and the only reason she didn't is because you stopped her. Shouldn't it still be a little bit uneven in your favour? Just by the smallest, tiniest amount? Just by a smidge?

"...Yeah, sure." You concede. Well, concede might be the wrong word, because that implies you ever really tried to fight it in the first place. That doesn't mean you think she's right, mind! You're just not going to argue about it because you don't care. You're both still alive, so there's no point splitting hairs about a little attempted murder. Besides, if she's going to be grateful towards you, it should be because you did something cool, not because you didn't snitch on her for almost killing you. "Water under the bridge."

Then, the topic moves along towards the other reason you came here: The aforementioned weird tentacle.

"Vaguely?" You answer, roaming eyes finally settling upon the curious Poipole as a good-enough thing to settle on. "It was pinkish, fleshy, made up of a bunch of loops, like a big weird chain. It's like that one tendril all the Nihilego had? If you can remember that? It seemed to sprout wherever, though. You had yours on your head, but others had them just about anywhere and everywhere..."

You pause for a moment, then speak again.

"...What, uh... What the fuck was that, anyway?"

---

Lulu Flint

SIGN-UP (RSVP)

CHARACTER RSVPing: Shred[break]
ROCKET POSITION: Beast[break]
POKEMON: Scrimblo the Meltan[break]
PLUS ONE?: Minus two[break]
WHITE ELEPHANT GIFT?: One "Shred Zeppelin Favour Coupon", consisting of a single A5 page unevenly torn from a notebook. Upon the front, the terms of the coupon are laid out in messy writing - The owner is owed one favour from Rocket Beast Shred Zeppelin, which they may spend to cash in said favour. Within smaller text along the bottom, the caveat is made that "the favour must be cool and/or sexy", that "I won't do fucking lame shit", and that there are "no refunds", whatever that means. On the back, a crude picture of four mice holding hands has been drawn in crayon, signed by a series of incoherent scribbles. The relation of this drawing to the rest of the coupon is unknown.[break]
EVENT CONTRIBUTION?: Shred did not help whatsoever. In fact, by regularly distracting Howard from his planning work, it could be argued that he actively hindered the party more than he aided.
[break]

Wow, that sure is a lot of mice. What did Team Rocket need with so many Maushold? Perhaps you would be better off not knowing the truth of this matter. Whatever the reason, it couldn't be good.

You take a moment to watch the mob of mice as they mill about. With so many household of Maushold all together, it almost seems like there’s a whole community of them gathered here. You could even call it a Vermillage… A Rattown…? A Cheesecity? Okay, look, not all your names can be as good as Ursabloodmoon. You’ll leave the evolution of this yet-to-be-discovered Maushold evolution to the scholars.

…Well, this was fun, but you should probably get going.

”I don’t think any Skitty would orchestrate this. A Raticate, maybe, but not a Skitty.” You shrug, handing the bag over to Alba as you check your watch and look to the horizon. ”Now, we’re already two minutes late, so pack it up and let’s get going.”

---

Alba Evovae
MP TOTAL:
SUPPLY - 100MP
5 IC POSTS - 50MP
ASSISTING A CHARACTER (HE HELPED ALBA OPEN THE BAG IT COUNT) - 10MP
COMPLETING AN RT MISSION - 100MP
PARTICIPATION - 50MP
LOSING (THEY WERE TWO MINUTES LATE :WORRYPOINT:) - 300MP
TOTAL = 610MP.

Most people don’t even try to fight back against the disaster bearing down upon them. After all, how can one fight against this natural phenomenon, unnatural though it may be. Most of the crowd just run for their lives. Others hunker down underneath whatever shelter they can find. The end result is complete and utter chaos.

One of those trying to escape said chaos is ana fell, whose Gardevoir the pair to safety. Alas, perhaps she should have been a little more scrupulous about what “safety” was. Instead of landing on solid ground, ana fell found herself in the air, and would quickly proceed to fall down, right on top of where Eris Halla was standing. Still, they were safe, and that was what mattered.

Fortunately, before things could get too out of hand, Aidan Hereford’s Gengar would step up to the challenge of stopping the raging whirlwind. Although, it wouldn’t quite go how it had hoped. As it opened its mouth wide to perform a Hypnosis upon the force of nature (A somewhat questionable choice, given it was neither awake nor asleep in the first place), it unintentionally ended up sucking the icy whorl straight into its mouth, devouring it whole. That, of course, was the good news. The bad news, however, is that it left the Gengar with a killer case of brain freeze.

However, that gave the others the opportunity they needed to strike back against the source of all the havoc - The Iron Bundle.

First up was Eris Halla’s Wooper, who fired out Stone Edges meant to act as a ramp. The logic was to use the Paradox Pokemon’s own momentum against it, to send it flying high into the air and crashing down to the ground. However, as the mysterious machine skidded about, the moment it grew too close to the Stone Edges, it suddenly ground to a complete halt.

Still, it wasn’t all bad, because it left the others with a stationary target.

Tempest Quinn was the first to take advantage of this, but he made one critical mistake - Candy Type might’ve perfectly countered Machine Type, but Candy Type was countered in kind by Creepy Type, rendering the match-up neutral. Thus, the Iron Bundle quickly turned the tables, extending a flipper towards the Syrup Bomb, and causing it to freeze in mid-air. Then, with a flick of its joints, the globule of syrup was sent flying back, hitting Tempest Quinn and completely coating him in the sticky liquid. This action would surely be seen for what it was, and surely, no childish innuendo would be made about it.

Kazimir Wynter, meanwhile, would have a little more success. His Lokix leapt straight into action, and aimed an Axe Kick to hit the Iron Bundle. However, it would return this gesture in kind, leaping up and aiming a Flip Turn towards the Lokix. The two attacks would clash, and while Lokix was clearly more powerful, the Iron Bundle would be able to escape, a geyser of foul-smelling water spraying out and sending it flying back.

And then, there was a showdown - Three muscled men on one side, a horrifying robot on the other, with two women watching on the sidelines. For his part, the Iron Bundle made no moves. It just slouched over, staring at the ground, completely unmoving. It was as though it was daring them to make the first move.

Just how would this escalate next?

---

The next deadline is the 23rd of November 2023, 7PM GMT.
Tempest Quinn Eris Halla ana fell Kazimir Wynter Aidan Hereford

As the train chugs onward and the Iron Bundle makes its escape, everyone makes their own attempt at stopping it. After all, this is a violent and unpredictable menace they’re dealing with. If it gets away here, then it’ll certainly go on to cause even more chaos, and if that happens, then Christmas could be ruined!

schuyler tate’s Pangoro takes the most direct action. After all, the train can’t get away if the train can’t move. So, the hulking brute charges towards the rails, aiming to break them beyond repair. But as he does, the dazed conductor shouts towards him, panic writ plain upon his face.

“No, Pangoro! THE THIRD RAIL!”

SLAM! A Hammer Arm hits the track, and then, BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT! Electricity courses through the bear’s body, intense voltage racing through his body. If one squints hard enough, they can almost see its skeleton. That was bad enough, and it would only get worse for the Pangoro, as it was struck by the full force of the train. Granted, the train’s top speed was only about fifteen miles per hour, but still.

Next up to the plate was robin coello’s Gengar, who floated up to the front of the train to hit the Iron Bundle with a Hypnosis. Yet, before he could put his devious plan in motion, the ghost was hit by a flurry of attacks. First, two flippers poked him directly in his wide eyes. Then, they grabbed its long tongue, and proceeded to pull it as far as it could stretch. Finally, with all its might, it proceeded to kick the ghost in the jaw, forcing it to bite down on its tongue. Not only did the Iron Bundle fight dirty, but it Played Rough, too.

Evidently, fighting this Iron Bundle head-on wasn’t working. So, trinity beckman would attempt a less violent solution, trying to blackmail the Paradox Pokemon by holding a plush toy of a Delibird hostage. That would indeed provoke a reaction from the criminal, though not the one she might’ve hoped.

SLORCH! The body of the Gengar, still reeling from its many owies, was thrown towards the plush toy with extreme prejudice, hitting it dead-on. It seemed that appealing to the pathos of this cold, unfeeling machine would not sway it from its violent ways.

It seemed that all attempts to stall its escape had failed, so all that was left was to chase it. virgil roach and his Cubone both managed to leap aboard the moving train, pulling themselves aboard one of the passenger cars, and ensuring they’d be able to keep up with the runaway. Meanwhile, as luka chêne was dealing with her newfound fan, her Togepi would perform a Metronome. In an instant, the tiny egg would begin to Fly, soaring high in the air for only a precious moment, before dropping back down onto the roof of the train.

But despite all their efforts, they still hadn’t stopped the rogue robot, and it wasn’t going to take this interference sitting down. Aiming its sack forward, it fired out a flurry of Air Cutters, shooting forth the slicing gusts towards those not currently on the train. Luckily, that meant virgil roach and luka chêne’s Togepi were safe. schuyler tate, robin coello, trinity beckman, and luka chêne herself, however? Were not so lucky.

---

The next deadline is the 23rd of November 2023, 7PM GMT.
schuyler tate robin coello virgil roach luka chêne trinity beckman

Arriving unfashionably late, John Sullivan is thrown into the deep end, and he decides to swim deeper. Enraged by his ruined gifts, he rushes towards the Iron Bundle, intending to punish the mischievous machine for its misdeeds. Unfortunately, in his anger, he misses out on one key detail - That being the flashbang still hanging in the air. It explodes in a flash of eye-searing light, and he ends up caught in it too. Thus, he ends up charging right past the Iron Bundle, and crashes straight into a stall selling fine china.

SMASH! CRACK! SHATTERSHATTERSHATTERSHATTERSHATTER! Dozens upon dozens of cups and plates come tumbling down, and John Sullivan is left to figuratively pick up the pieces. And, if the screaming shopkeeper is anything to go, he might end up having to do it literally, too.

Another of the blinded suffers a far less expensive fate. In his stumbling, Jack Napier doesn’t bump into hundreds of Pokedollars of ceramic, but into Elise Calcifet instead. Fortunately, neither of them are hurt by the fall, though arguably, the fall in the least of their concerns.

Elise Calcifet’s Mismagius, Hyakkaryōran Tsubaki’s Gengar, and Momo Sakai’s Cherrim all retaliate against the Paradox Pokemon in quick succession. First, a Sludge Wave crashes down upon it, dousing it in acid, and sending a used car battery bouncing off of its head. Then, a Petal Blizzard swarms around it, battering the penguin with a flowery barrage. Finally, as though to add insult to injury, its very own gift was thrown back at it with Psychic, the eight ball slamming into its body and bursting, covering it from toe to tip in white powder.

With such an effective combination of ruthless attacks, the fight is almost over. Sparks shoot out of its body as the robot stumbles back and forth. The Iron Bundle is clearly reaching its limit. All it would take is one more good hit to--

PSSSSSSSSST! Reaching into its bag, the Iron Bundle nonchalantly pulls out a shady-looking potion and sprays itself, and soon enough, it’s back in tip top shape. Now, back to work, and double time! After all, it needs to make up for all the time it’s already lost!

Thus, the mailman begins to gift like there’s no tomorrow. Already behind schedule, it resorts to giving away that which it has the most of - fireworks. Sparklers, firecrackers, roman candles, Catherine wheels, skyrockets, all of them are haphazardly tossed into the open arms of the eager public. It’s even so kind as to pre-prepare them, igniting each one before it tosses it into the crowd.

It’s truly an inspiring showcase for the quick pace and unrelenting work ethic of these machines. Before long, a dozen lit explosives have been littered around the market, and if he isn’t stopped, then a dozen more will be given out, too!

---

The next deadline is the 23rd of November 2023, 7PM GMT.
Hyakkaryōran Tsubaki Jack Napier John Sullivan Momo Sakai Elise Calcifet

She's okay. That's good! You're glad she's alright. You were worried she might've been horribly traumatised by the whole "getting kidnapped by aliens and infected with an unknown parasite" thing, but fortunately, that doesn't seem to be the case. Which, actually, is a convenient little segue to the other thing you came here to--

Before you can get that far, Lulu moves closer, and you instinctively straighten up. You're not quite sure why. Maybe you were hoping for some out-of-nowhere intimate moment, as though this were some trashy romcom. More likely, you were expecting her to start attacking you again. Whatever the case, she stops short of either, which is probably for the best. Both of those outcomes would've probably lead to a meeting with HR, and you're already on thin ice with them for "inappropriate use of language in a company email" and "smoking in prohibited areas". Instead, she asks you what happened between the two of you.

And that is one hell of a loaded question.

"...You, uh, tried to kill me." You murmur, glancing around the laboratory. Primarily, you're checking for eavesdroppers, anyone who might be listening in when they shouldn't. Secondarily, it's a great excuse to continue avoiding eye contact. "Because of that weird tentacle on your head, I think. And then I cut it off, and then you were fine again...?"

---

Lulu Flint

Aaaaah, shit.

"It's fine! It's fine." You shout, and then you whisper. Sure, it's dream mist, but also, it's just dream mist. That doesn't necessarily mean that there's any Paradox Pokemon hanging about. It's like smoke - Yeah, it's a bad sign, but it doesn't mean that there's a fire going on. "Don't cause a fuss. We just need to get out of here, before--"

CLANG! BZZZZZZZZT! As though Paradox-Arceus is acting specifically to spite you, silhouettes rise out of the vent. It's grotesque and gangly and long, horribly misshapen and overall awful. With a few wobbly steps, the shadow steps out of the pink fog and reveals itself as... A Magneton? A really, really malformed Magneton. Why is it so hairy?

ZAP! A Thunderbolt races past your head, as the Sandy Shocks continues to amble forth with malicious intent. Well, seems there's no time to be critiquing its aesthetic. At least, not when it's trying to kill you.

"SHIT!"

---

howard slayte

Today just really isn't a good day for you, is it?

First of all, it's a Monday. That's not inherently bad, but it's the day after a weekend, so of course that means you're also hungover. Then, you get shafted by the chore lottery and end up with janitor duty for the day. And, to top it all off, you've been called into some mysterious meeting with the higher-ups that they keep playing coy about. So, to summarise: Your head hurts, you're stuck scrubbing walls and mopping floors, and there's a strong possibility that you're going to be murdered before you see tomorrow. Joy.

Still, it's not all bad. The woman briefing you is pretty easy on the eyes. Apparently, she's someone important within Team Rocket. What was it... Admin? Underboss? Underadmin? Something like that. Whatever she is, just standing in front of her makes Howard act like a death row inmate. Grigori, meanwhile, is as stoic as ever. Personally? You think she's pretty hot, but that's neither here nor there.

"Nope." You simply reply, walking past Elisabeth as you make for the door. After all, what questions would you even need to ask? This is a glorified animal control job, how hard can it really be? Plus, you get to glance at her ass as you walk past, and you figure that's good motivation to keep you going. "No point stalling. After all, this'll be over in no time."

Yeah, you're totally "that guy" right now. You're definitely "him". She's very "impressed". Nevertheless, you keep laying the "cool" on thick. Raising your foot, you plant a boot straight in the middle of the door to the baths, kicking it wide open...

Or at least, that's the plan. Instead, your foot bounces off, the door doesn't budge an inch, and your leg hurts, too. Hm. That's weird. Why the hell is the door stuck? And why the hell did it have to happen while girls were watching?

"...Gregory, open the door, please."

---

Elisabeth Fiorelli howard slayte Grigori Sokolov

DRK Triad this, Avatarship that. As you've just recently learned, they're both very important things to the upper echelons of Team Rocket, and very good reasons to be interested in the appearance of Kyogre. They're also very convenient excuses for you to come along, though you aren't here for either of those aforementioned reasons.

No, you're here to fight it. You've already had the misfortunate of crossing paths with it once, but this time, it's going to have the misfortune of crossing paths with you. You might not kill it, hell, you might not even win in the slightest, but you'll certainly leave that leviathan bloodier than it was than when you arrived. You'll be like, uh... The guy from Moby Dick... What was he called again...? Y'know... Y'know, him.

Okay, you haven't read Moby Dick. As it happens, you also haven't ready all those refresher emails you got about the DRK Triad, which is why you can't really relate to the Head Scientist. Oh well. You'll find the time eventually. For now, you just need to bullshit that you're in the know.

"...Yeah, definitely."

You lean back in your seat, glancing around at the open sea. Things are plenty rough and plenty stormy, but there's no sight of that big fucker floating along on the surface. So, where the hell is he hiding, and where is he going to attack from?

---

Naomi Sato

"Man, this fucking sucks."

You look over to the crumpled body of Chester C. Coins, laying on a crater in the ground. He's not even dying! He just got knocked out and he's mumbling in his sleep. With a sigh, you return him to his Pokeball, which handles the first problem. Now you're just left with the second problem, which is how you're supposed to climb back up to the rest of the cave.

"And it was all going so well, too." You grumble, fruitlessly checking your pockets, and confirming what you already knew: You do not, in fact, have a way to get back up. "Well, I've got nothing. What about you, have you got any kind of hooks or rope or..."

You pause. Sniff. Sniff sniff. Huh, the air smells funny in here. Have you been sitting on top of a deposit of natural gas this whole time? No, no time to think about that now. You've got to take today one hustle at a time, and right now, making sure that none of your captives are escaping is top priority.

---

howard slayte

It's debatable whether or not a Xurkitree even can get concussed. After all, it is an alien. Maybe it doesn't have a brain in that weird bulb that's vaguely anomalous to a head. Is it even conscious? Can it think, can it feel? Is it even real?

But if it truly does have a brain, then it would absolutely be concussed by the following sequence. As the Heatran bursts from the ground, its jaws trap the Ultra Beast, clamping down on its legs. Then, the Stone Edge smashes into its head, hitting it like a dozen uppercuts all at once. One can almost hear its grey matter slamming against the top of its skull (if it has either of those), only to be suddenly brought crashing down to the bottom as its dragged down into the ground. The damage is bad, but the whiplash is worst. Still, it won't be enough to put them down.

"Tch! Playing dirty, are we? Fine! Xurkitree, Zap Cannon that Heatran!"

Nothing. The Ultra Beast remains limp, unmoving. Was that really enough to knock it out? What the fuck! What happened to the super strong bastard that you had to deal with in the Ultra Plant? This is just like that thing when you beat a boss in a video game, and you finally unlock them, but they turn out to be weak as shit. Highly disappointing. And now what the hell are you supposed to do?

"...Ugh, fine! I am Shred Zeppelin." You give up the ghost, but that doesn't mean you have to like it. Still, you can't afford to waste any more time on this, so you'll have to make a small sacrifice to get this over with. "Are you happy? Now hand over Howard."

---

Eris Halla

Gifting Gacha Rapidash to Elise Calcifet